What gun for terror Squirrel?

[Brat7748]

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,208026,00.html

It was an unrivaled force of destruction capable of inspiring sheer terror in the hearts of the stoic. It was a sinister picnic crasher hell-bent on havoc. It was a vicious villain who seemed to take pleasure in inflicting injury on the innocent.

It was a squirrel. And it was one bad rodent.

When word spread about the demise of the squirrel in Winter Park's Central Park, more and more of its victims came forward with tales of unprovoked fury and picnics crashed.

Dylan Osborne, 19, says he could’ve ended the critter’s seven-day reign of terror if authorities would’ve heeded his call, the Orlando Sentinel reports.

He and his friends were celebrating a birthday in the park when they came face to face with the furry fiend’s fury. The squirrel jumped on his friend, latched on to her leg and bit her. When they shook it off, it attacked her shoes as they lay by the fountain....

 

[Hoppy590]

gamo air rifle. and some pieces of bread

 

[Roadwild17]

Deff 22lr

 

[ravencon]

These attacks stem from a network of Jihadist squirrels who hate our freedom and democracy.

Nothing less than an airstrike will suffice.

 

[PATH]

I concur!

 

[MrZ]

The best part of that whole story...

""I was furious," Lance Osborne, Dylan’s father, said. "My son basically sat on top of this squirrel on a cake box and on a bucket in downtown Winter Park, and no one did anything about it."


HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Operator: "Animal control, how can I help you?"

Schmuck: "Yes, I'd like some assistance at winter park, I've captured a squirrel that has been attacking people."

Operator: "......"

Schmuck: "Hello!?"

Operator: "I'm sorry sir, did you say a SQUIRREL?"

Schmuck: "Yes, that's correct. It attacked me and my girlfriend, but I have it trapped in a cake box. Can you send someone to get it?"

Operator: "A squirrel!?"

[Angry squirrel sounds. Gnawing and scratching sounds]

Schmuck: "YES a SQUIRREL. It's very vicious and...wait a...hold on, it's chewing through the box...hold on...no, give me that bucket...no the bucket"

[More angry squirrel sounds]

Operator: "Sir...?"

Schmuck: "...O.K., ready...GO..."

[More angry squirrel sounds]

Schmuck: "WATCH ITS FANGS!!! WATCH ITS FANGS!!!"

Operator: "Sir...are you there?"

Schmuck: "...hello...yes...can you send someone?"

Operator: "Is this for real?"

Schmuck: "YES!! This squirrel is very vicious and I need your help!"

Operator: "I'm hanging up now."

[CLICK]

Schmuck: "No don't hang...."

[More angry squirrel sounds]

 

[Glock_10mm]

I'd go .50 BMG


J/K the Gamo or Beeman .22 or .25 airrifles are pretty good for this, otherwise a .22LR or a .410 bore shotgun if you cant get a quick enough shot. Depends where you live too, the airrifles mentioned first have a pop but less than a .22 which is more discreet if you cant shoot of firearms in you city.

 

[oneshooter]

American 180 with 2-3 xtra drums!!!

Oneshooter
Livin in Texas

 

[Dave Markowitz]

Calling Brother Maynard!

...And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this, Thy hand grenade, that with it, Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits... in Thy mercy." And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and large chu... [Whereupon the friar is urged, "skip ahead a bit, brother"]... And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it." Amen.

 

[el44vaquero]

Just stop by Washington Co, in Oklahoma. Pick up any kid, drop him off with a 6 pack of coke, a bag of ruffles, a marlin 60, and come back in a few hours. Every squirrel withing 500yrds would be stacked neatly in a burlap sack waiting to be cleaned and fried.

 

[bubbygator]

Pest animals in Florida may only be legally shot with .22 or .410 - and then only on your own property.

I used that little legal gem to add a .410 to my arsenal when we had a pesky coon.

 

[Jac]

I would use a Tromix converted Saiga in .410

Blam, blam
GET BACK HERE, SQUIRREL!
Blamblamblamblamblam

 

['Card]

"Game over, man! Game over!!"

 

[hankdatank1362]

The squirrel is often the most underestimated of all rodent game. They are very quick, elusive, and cunning creatures, and possess razor-sharp teeth and claws that can shred through human skin like a Ginsu knife with only the slightest glancing blow. They should all be considered extremely dangerous, maybe more so than a cape buffalo or lion, and should be engaged with no less than a GE minigun or .50 BMG. GOOD CITIZENS BEWARE!

 

[dracphelan]

Nuke it from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

 

[just one question]

...

I wouldn't want to tangle with a squirrel! Yes I am confident I could kill it;but they must have sharp teeth and claws for those acorns


The little guy could probably scratch you up pretty good...

On another note I am the only person on earth who doesn't like them...they are an ugly rat with a bushy tail!

 

[The-Fly]

just point the suckers out to me, and i'll go in with my extrema 2 and leave no witnesses

 

[Abby]

Man, if you guys had heard some of the "Killer Squirrel" calls I took when working at Fish and Wildlife...

I think this particular squirrel may have required what I refer to as my "rat in the trash" ensemble - that is, a .22 pistol and a Yorkshire Terrier.

 

[ksnecktieman]

You terrible BRUTES,, it would not be that way if it's father had not been run over by a car when it was young. It does not know it is a vegetarian. We should capture it, and teach it what it is supposed to eat, and release it back into the park,,, after all,,, it is not this young squirrels fault...... It was deprived,,,,,

OH , GEEZ, I sound like my sister......

 

[Hemicuda]

I do believe that this is EXACTLY the problem that the Hornady Mach 2 was designed for...

as a launching platform, I sugguest the Savage MKII rifle, in a laminate thumbhole target stock, stainless bull barrel, accu-trigger, and good optics...

 

[sm]

Stare it down...

Who needs a gun? Just show it a Picture of Sen. Clinton.

It takes one look to frighten a squirrel to death.

 

[FSCJedi]

This is a freakin' hilarious story. Reminds me of The Squirrel Grenade that was on here (I think) a long time ago...

Oh, and hankdatank1362... I loved the movie that your sig is from! Just saw it for the first time this past weekend. And the quote is so true, as well.

 

[Christianninja]

Reminds me of an article I read like last year that showed squirrels attacking pigeons and other small animals in droves, literally tearing it to pieces and running off with little flesh bits. They said it had to do with food shortages and loss of habitat, and they could move on to larger animals....

*everyone freaks out, unseen, I scratch a blackboard in the back*

My friends, squirrel season starts tomorow. The other day I sighted in my .22 rifle, and have nearly five hundred rounds at the ready. I shall pursue the enemy...I shall kill it...and I shall eat it with reckless abandon.

Pray to whatever Deity you may worship that I don't fall prey to their tiny, tiny jaws.

 

[Zen21Tao]

 

[loki.fish]

LOL, funny stuff

Zen, I like the photoshop on the revolver, priceless.