PennsyPlinker
Member
I didn't do it, but I was ready to. We live in an old stone farmhouse out in the country. We are not the only ones living in it. That will become clearer in a moment. Last might it was a balmy one degree with the wind howling along at about 25 mph. It won't rattle the stone, but it does rattle the windows. Temperature in the house varies from 58 deg (setback on the thermostat) to somewhat colder in the extremes of the house.
Lying in bed, I was awakened by what sounded like an entire construction crew of mice working on one of their tunnels through the plaster over the stone walls. At least, that is what I thought at the time. Having heard those sorts of noises before, there is little to do but go back to sleep, resolving to feed the cat less tomorrow, and purchase some traps besides. But this sounded like a whole lot of mice, or a very big one, so much so that Mrs. Plinker, who sleeps very soundly, woke up too. She agreed with my assessment and went back to sleep. In this weather mice in the house is a given. There may be more mice or less mice, but there are always mice.
Fast forward to 5:00 AM. Mrs. Plinker gets up and begins her preparations to leave for work. All of a sudden there is a scream! I leap out of bed, only to hear her exclaim that there is a squirrel running around loose in the hallway between the bathroom and our bedroom! Being a city girl, she first posed the theory that it was a mouse of exceptional size (or is that rodent of unusual size?)
Then she suggested baby squirrel. As soon as I saw it I realized my friend the flying squirrel was back.
Fresh from my bed, I was adorned in only my tactical briefs, with no holster available for my CCW. We chased the home invader around with a small plastic tote, the same weapon I used last time the squirrel made an incursion into the human section of the house. It literally disappeared into the woodwork. Mrs. Plinker had to get to work, so I commenced surveillance of the most likely routes of approach, all the while back in my warm bed - this time reading a sci-fi book about bug eyed scaly devils invading the earth. This was probably not a good idea. The next thing I knew, the squirrel had leaped onto the bed and was headed straight for my head!
I yelled so loud he jumped straight into the air, reversed direction (just like the cartoons) and ran back the way he came. I leaped out of bed again, grabbed my containment bucket, and started chasing him around the house again. All the while I am thinking, I've got that new Taurus Judge and #8 shot. It probably wouldn't make too big a hole in the wall - just a little in the plaster. And it won't damage the outer stone walls at all. But if I hit the water bed, I am going to be sleeping in the barn for the next few weeks. The temptation was almost too much to bear.
Victory was finally mine when the squirrelly little devil jumped up on the bed again. I clapped my tote down over him, and slid the lid gently under his feet, giving him time to step up onto it. One squirrel does not a meal make, especially these little flying ones. Besides, who needs the JBT from PETA at the door?
Still dressed in my BVDs only, I walked out onto the back porch and set the little monster free. Just like last time, he made it back into the house before I did, but at least he used his own front door instead of mine. You see, we have had these buggers living in the stone chimney of the walk in fireplace for years. For the most part they do not bother us, and we do not bother them - for now anyway. The time will come when I can turn my attention to evicting them permanently. In the meantime, I need to practice more with that Taurus Judge.
Lying in bed, I was awakened by what sounded like an entire construction crew of mice working on one of their tunnels through the plaster over the stone walls. At least, that is what I thought at the time. Having heard those sorts of noises before, there is little to do but go back to sleep, resolving to feed the cat less tomorrow, and purchase some traps besides. But this sounded like a whole lot of mice, or a very big one, so much so that Mrs. Plinker, who sleeps very soundly, woke up too. She agreed with my assessment and went back to sleep. In this weather mice in the house is a given. There may be more mice or less mice, but there are always mice.
Fast forward to 5:00 AM. Mrs. Plinker gets up and begins her preparations to leave for work. All of a sudden there is a scream! I leap out of bed, only to hear her exclaim that there is a squirrel running around loose in the hallway between the bathroom and our bedroom! Being a city girl, she first posed the theory that it was a mouse of exceptional size (or is that rodent of unusual size?)
Then she suggested baby squirrel. As soon as I saw it I realized my friend the flying squirrel was back. Fresh from my bed, I was adorned in only my tactical briefs, with no holster available for my CCW. We chased the home invader around with a small plastic tote, the same weapon I used last time the squirrel made an incursion into the human section of the house. It literally disappeared into the woodwork. Mrs. Plinker had to get to work, so I commenced surveillance of the most likely routes of approach, all the while back in my warm bed - this time reading a sci-fi book about bug eyed scaly devils invading the earth. This was probably not a good idea. The next thing I knew, the squirrel had leaped onto the bed and was headed straight for my head!
I yelled so loud he jumped straight into the air, reversed direction (just like the cartoons) and ran back the way he came. I leaped out of bed again, grabbed my containment bucket, and started chasing him around the house again. All the while I am thinking, I've got that new Taurus Judge and #8 shot. It probably wouldn't make too big a hole in the wall - just a little in the plaster. And it won't damage the outer stone walls at all. But if I hit the water bed, I am going to be sleeping in the barn for the next few weeks.
The temptation was almost too much to bear.Victory was finally mine when the squirrelly little devil jumped up on the bed again. I clapped my tote down over him, and slid the lid gently under his feet, giving him time to step up onto it. One squirrel does not a meal make, especially these little flying ones. Besides, who needs the JBT from PETA at the door?
Still dressed in my BVDs only, I walked out onto the back porch and set the little monster free. Just like last time, he made it back into the house before I did, but at least he used his own front door instead of mine. You see, we have had these buggers living in the stone chimney of the walk in fireplace for years. For the most part they do not bother us, and we do not bother them - for now anyway. The time will come when I can turn my attention to evicting them permanently. In the meantime, I need to practice more with that Taurus Judge. 
