Revolver option
If the Smith is getting to be a more serious choice, but you are worried about recoil, consider trying out a Ruger SP101, 2 1/4" bbl, .357. It's a bit heavier than the S&W, but the extra mass will help absorb the slap of the magnum recoil. It won't be a kitten* of a gun to shoot, still, but it would be more comfortable than a lighter gun. It weighs about 25 oz, so the weight is more noticable. If accuracy is a concern, you can McSize it to a 3" bbl and only add 2 more ounces to the gun. It's in the j-frame size, but a k-frame weight. Best of both worlds???
Q
*To the moderators & readers of this post: Originally, I used the other term for "kitty cat" (starts with P, rhymes with T, and stands for pool) and it got ***'ed. My deepest and most sincere apologies. I wasn't trying to get away with any words that do not live up to THR standards. I simply didn't think about it being a flagged word. I CERTAINLY wasn't trying to use inappropriate language and take a low-road vocabulary.