John Kerry: A Deeply Ignorant Man

[Cool Hand Luke 22:36]

Washington Prowler
Kerry Lite
Published 5/12/2004 12:07:58 AM


LET THEM EAT RIBS
Presumptive Democratic presidential candidate Sen. John Kerry thinks he has a gravitas problem. "He thinks he has too much of it, and he thinks that's a problem," says a former campaign staffer.

To counteract his perceived perception that he is too serious and weighted down by the vagaries of intellectual and physical prowess, Kerry's staff has had him using humor in his stump speeches.

For example, over the weekend, while talking about health care reform, Kerry cracked that he would not delve into too much detail. No one in the audience appeared to see the humor.

As well, Kerry told a reporter that he enjoyed going out for beers with the fellows, knocking back a few and whooping it up. "It's not easy humanizing a guy like Kerry," says the former staffer. "You have Vietnam, and you have friends who can speak to his private life, but Kerry himself is not a great advocate for himself in that regard. He's just too stiff and patrician."

Just how serious a problem it is, and how desperate the Kerry campaign is to try to shatter the stiff myth, was again apparent during Kerry's swing through Jacksonville and Orlando on Tuesday. Both are areas that are thought to be Bush strongholds, though in 2000, Gore made a race of both in the general election.

So Kerry's staff decided their man needed to spend some time down and dirty with the everyday folk. They asked Rep. Corrine Brown, the Democrat who represents the Jacksonville congressional district, to do some research and find a local hole in the wall that Kerry could visit.

"They said it had to be a place where Senator Kerry could appear to just make an impromptu stop, nothing planned," says a Democratic National Committee staffer doing work in Florida. "The campaign had a bunch of people scrambling for the right spot."

That spot turned out to be a Jenkins' Quality Bar-B-Que franchise. Kerry, who arrived at the restaurant with Brown in tow, made a point of ordering some ribs (on the house, as it turned out), asked to look at the kitchen, then announced to all that none of the workers had health insurance! With that, he and his contingent of staff and reporters left. Kerry the everyday guy barely touched his ribs. Perhaps because there wasn't a knife and fork and silk napkin around.

"That they have to stage these things, and then he can't even perform isn't a good sign," says a Democratic media consultant in Washington, D.C. "You'd think they'd have learned from that cheesesteak fiasco in Philadelphia, where Kerry didn't even know what the sandwich was. Just give up and let him be who he is."

http://www.spectator.org/dsp_article.asp?art_id=6551
____________________________________________________

"Didn't even know what the sandwich was"

wut?...***??...***???....WHAT THE FAROUK????

How in the hell could anybody NOT know what a Philly Cheesesteak is????

:banghead: <-- Average Americans ponder this news.

And they're running this stiff for President? God help us!

 

[throwweight]

A patrician gigilo....all the stiffness of Al Gore AND Bill Clinton combined.
The left gets what it deserves.

 

[Joe Demko]

A patrician gigilo....all the stiffness of Al Gore AND Bill Clinton combined.

When was Bill Clinton ever stiff, except for that incident with Ms. Lewinski? Gore had trouble with his public persona, no doubt about that. Bill Clinton, however, was a consumate politician. He weathered scandals, accusations, the wrath of the NRA, impeachment, etc. and was elected twice and served out both terms. I despised the man, but one thing you cannot accuse him of was inablility to work a crowd.

 

[Kharn]

He asked for swiss cheese on his cheesesteak...

Kharn

 

[Yowza]

When was Bill Clinton ever stiff, except for that incident with Ms. Lewinski?

Something tells me you just answered your own question. I believe that was what we call "tongue-in-cheek."

Rick

 

[w4rma]

That article is from the thoroughly discredited Spectator. The Spectator is funded by Richard Mellon Scaife, a very reclusive man who inherited a lot of wealth.

Here is David Brock's book about his work making up smears on Democrats for the Spectator:

Blinded by the Right: The Conscience of an Ex-Conservative
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0812930991/103-7334092-2825461?v=glance

 

[capt_happypants]

If you can't attack the message, attack the messenger.

John Kerry is so stiff, he's a walking testament to Viagra.

 

[Cool Hand Luke 22:36]

Here's another take on Kerry's common touch from the rabidly right-wing Philadelphia Daily News

_________________________________________________________
Posted on Thu, Aug. 14, 2003

Cheesesteak bites Kerry

PREZ HOPEFUL ASKS FOR SWISS CHEESE!

BY DON RUSSELL

[email protected]


THE presidential election is still 15 months away, the nation's attention is on Ben and Jen, and the biggest name in politics is Schwarzenegger.

But we may have just witnessed the unraveling of the Democratic front-runner's campaign for the White House right here in South Philadelphia, at 9th and Wharton.

Let it be recorded: At lunchtime on Aug. 11, 2003, under the familiar awning of Pat's King of Steaks, Sen. John Kerry attempted to eat a cheesesteak.

For presidential candidates, eating a cheesesteak in South Philly is a political rite of passage. Clinton did it, and so did Gore. John McCain gobbled one, with hot peppers.

But this is more than just shaking hands and kissing babies. For a pol, eating a cheesesteak is like running the gauntlet - past the surly counterman, through the variety of toppings, finishing it off without looking lame.

We want to see if you can survive. And if you can't manage a dripping steak, why should we have any confidence that you can handle a slippery character like Osama bin Laden?

Kerry, you may have heard, failed miserably.

He ordered a cheesesteak with Swiss cheese.

Now I suppose in some corners of the world, Swiss is a perfectly acceptable sandwich ingredient. Switzerland, maybe.

But in Philadelphia, ordering Swiss on a cheesesteak is like rooting for Dallas at an Eagles game. It isn't just politically incorrect; it could get you a poke in the nose.

I once witnessed a sandwich-maker reach halfway out a store window, grab a dude by the neck and threaten to kneecap him and his girlfriend just because the guy asked, "With what?"

Onions, you idiot!

Pat's Steak owner Frank Olivieri had the good grace not to throttle Kerry. But he did advise him that, here in Philly, we don't much like Swiss-eating campaign monkeys.

He got Cheez Whiz instead. The damage, though, was already done.

At first, reporters snickered. Then word filtered into the national press that Kerry looked like a doof. Yesterday, the Washington Post compared the debacle to the first President Bush's out-of-touch questions upon encountering a common supermarket scanner.

Dukakis in a tank.

Quayle's "potatoe" misspelling.

Nixon's five o'clock shadow.

And now this: Kerry's cheesesteak mistake.

I blame it on his handlers.

I mean, who was the dope on his advance team who told Kerry to order a cheesesteak hoagie? For cryin' out loud, the guy's a rookie; eating a cheesesteak hoagie, with its layers of lettuce and tomato, is like trying to hit a major league fastball.

Kerry asked the photographers to stop shooting pictures. Right. You see a train wreck coming, the last thing you do is put down your camera.

So the man who would be president of the people was photographed delicately gripping the sandwich with his fingertips like he's some kind of Boston blue blood playing the piccolo. You half expected him to ask for a silk napkin, Jeeves.

If Kerry had any sense, he'd have gone to our Gov. Rendell for some culinary advice. Here's a guy, the former chairman of the Democratic National Committee, who got himself elected mayor of Philadelphia a decade ago almost solely on his ability to stuff a cheesesteak down his trap without ruining a necktie.

We in Philadelphia expect nothing less of our Commander in Chief.

http://www.philly.com/mld/philly/news/local/6528601.htm?1c

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What kind of Dork would order Swiss Cheese on a Philly Cheesesteak?

<----Inquiring minds want to know.

 

[El Tejon]

I'll have you know Johnny Ketchup was in Vietnam and he does not own an SUV (the family owns it).

 

[foghornl]

John sKerry makes Al [woody] Gore look like New Orleans at midinight on Mardi Gras.

 

[Cool Hand Luke 22:36]

More on Kerry's Philly Cheesesteak faux pas from the propaganda outlet of the vast right wing conspiracy: CNN

___________________________________________________

WASHINGTON (Creators Syndicate) -- President Gerald R. Ford faced a stiff challenge from former California Gov. Ronald Reagan in the 1976 Texas Republican primary.

Because presidents command local media attention, TV cameras in San Antonio recorded the president's embarrassment when he tried to eat a tamale without first removing the husk. The line on the press bus was that Ford had sewed up the " klutz vote."

Four years earlier, South Dakota Sen. George McGovern, the Democratic presidential nominee, while campaigning in New York City, had committed his own gastronomical gaffe: In a kosher delicatessen to go with his corned beef sandwich, McGovern asked for a glass of milk.

Now it is Sen. John Kerry's, D-Massachusetts, turn for a food faux pas. Last Monday afternoon, at 9th and Wharton in South Philadelphia, Kerry showed up for a scheduled visit with supporters and customers at "Pat's King of Steaks." There, Kerry did what presidential candidates are supposed to do. He ordered the local favorite, a Philadelphia cheesesteak hoagie.

Apparently, unlike candidates John McCain and Al Gore, who knew when they stopped in South Philly that the cheese in a cheesesteak is Cheese Whiz, John Kerry made the mistake of asking for Swiss cheese.

Owner Frank Olivieri confided to reporters that he had persuaded the Democratic presidential candidate (who as a 10-year-old had actually gone to boarding school in Switzerland) that what he really wanted was Cheese Whiz. But the invited press had heard the exchange and the damage was done.

American candidates have long used their food preferences to define their politics. When England's King George VI, on the eve of World War II, visited President Franklin Roosevelt at Hyde Park, FDR offered the British monarch and his royal entourage a menu of very American hot dogs and decidedly non-premium Rupert's beer

To prove he was just folks, President George Herbert Walker Bush, like Kerry an alumnus of a prestigious boarding school and Yale, emphasized his incurable appetite for pork rinds. And who could forget Bush's 1990 declaration of dietary independence? "My mother made me eat broccoli. I hate broccoli. I am president of the United States. I will not eat any more broccoli."

New York is a tossed ethnic salad. The late Republican Nelson Rockefeller (who was born not with a silver spoon in his mouth but instead with complete silver place-settings for 12) demonstrated an unmatched common touch while campaigning for governor by feasting on knishes and kung pao chicken and tacos and hot dogs and cannolis. Because politics is probably the most imitative of all the American arts, candidates ever since have tried -- mostly unsuccessfully -- to match the delightfully ravenous Rocky.

In the knife and fork department (or, more accurately, in the carry-out line), Democratic presidential candidate Bill Clinton was undeniably a small 'd' Democrat. Who couldn't identify with the Arkansas governor's weakness for Big Macs and fries? Nothing pretentious about that.

Ketchup has played its own important political role. The administration of Ronald Reagan stupidly and indefensibly classified -- for school lunch purposes -- America's favorite condiment as a vegetable. A favorite dish of President Richard M. Nixon, a man of undeniably different tastes, was cottage cheese with ketchup on it.

All of which brings us back to ketchup and John Kerry, whose own pockets became very deep indeed after he married an heiress to the Heinz fortune.

People who know what it's like to fall behind on a 48-month car note and whose favorite cheese is not brie, but Velveeta. He can be grateful that his Philly cheesesteak stumble was in the week of Arnold-mania and in the month of August 2003, rather than September 2004. Otherwise, he would be eating only crow.

http://www.cnn.com/2003/ALLPOLITICS/08/18/column.shields.opinion.lunch/

 

[Kharn]

(who as a 10-year-old had actually gone to boarding school in Switzerland)

bwahaha, "the common man" indeed.

Kharn

 

[Cool Hand Luke 22:36]

who as a 10-year-old had actually gone to boarding school in Switzerland)

I'll bet he wore much better Lederhosen than the other fancy lads.



Cabinboy, starring John Kerry as Nathanial Mayweather

 

[Thumper]

Golgo...I think that was throwweight's point. Pretty funny guy.

 

[Art Eatman]

Folks trying for high office are supposed to be able to look toward the future, to plan ahead, right? So part of the campaign trail thing oughta include planning ahead, right? And if you're in a part of the country where the various "neat deals" for food are totally unknown to you, why don't you ask some local "handler" about the "How to?" part of the deal? If you can't plan that far ahead, like an hour or two, how do you deal with that "Great big world, out there"?

I oughta run for something. I've got two war cries about food: "Call me anything, as long as it's in time for supper," and, "If it doesn't bite back, I'll eat it."

Heck, were I campaigning in ChinaTown, I'd get my happy self photographed taking chopstick lessons...

In general, though, senators are among the "stuffed-est" shirts on this old earth.

Art

 

[USAFNoDAk]

I think it boils down to arrogance and elitism as to why John Kerry would be reluctant to ask for help in dealing with local issues that he really is uninformed about (the cheese steak debacle).

Can't you just hear old Lurch: "Me? Ask the common folks to guide me as I try to show how common I am? I am a Vietnam Veteran. A battle tested hero, with three purple hearts, which I didn't throw over a fence, to prove it. I am married to one of the richest women in the US. I don't own expensive SUV's but my family has lots of them. I have served as a US Senator for multiple terms. I am too smart and well informed on world affairs to ask a commoner how to behave like a commoner".

 

[Mulliga]

Quite frankly, I don't like Cheese Whiz that much, either. Is there something so fancy about Swiss cheese? Can't people find more pertinent measures of character than food?

 

[Cosmoline]

What do you wanna bet Kerry has no clue what bread and milk cost. These people are barely human, they're so far removed from the real world.

 

[Moparmike]

Ok, I must be missing something. I have never seen a Philly Cheesesteak without swiss cheese.


Grant you, I have never been to Philly though.




And I would surely have more sense to send out feelers to get a grasp of local delights and so on. Like in Lincoln, Ar, its apples. Apple cider there is GREAT. But I wouldnt know that if I was from Wyoming or something.

 

[c_yeager]

It would only take a small bit of preparation to NOT look like a total fool in front of the locals. Not that Kerry is in much danger of LOSING philly anyways.

On a side note the idea of a sandwich slathered in Cheese Whiz doesnt make me particularly happy either. But, im not running for president.

 

[Shanghai McCoy]

If an eclectic appetite,for food, is a major qualification to be Da Prez then I'd be a heck of a candidate.....

 

[Destructo6]

When was Bill Clinton ever stiff, except for that incident with Ms. Lewinski?

Yeah, he definately did not suffer from being overly formal. His looseness got him into trouble, regularly.

Something tells me you just answered your own question. I believe that was what we call "tongue-in-cheek."

Something in cheek, anyway.

 

[Standing Wolf]

Just give up and let him be who he is.

The next Dukakis.

 

[bountyhunter]

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When was Bill Clinton ever stiff, except for that incident with Ms. Lewinski?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Something tells me you just answered your own question. I believe that was what we call "tongue-in-cheek."

Rick

If you think that was his tongue in her cheek, I humbly suspect you missed health Ed the day they covered all that stuff.

 

[Lone_Gunman]

There is plenty wrong with Kerry, and yet we are now discussing his dislike of BBQ?