Unsettling encounter - am I being paranoid? (Long)

Status
Not open for further replies.

TarDevil

Member
Joined
Dec 29, 2009
Messages
2,681
Location
NC Coast
Wife drove us to CVS, pulled into our parking spot. Almost immediately a 20ish hispanic man pulls in beside us.

Wife took a few extra seconds to gather her things, then we got out. Man beside us is still sitting in his car, head down.

In the store, my wife went down an aisle, I stayed at the end of the aisle near the front of the store. Suddenly I hear "Excuse me," turn to see the same young man waiting to pass by. He had plenty of room, but whatever... I said, "Sorry" and moved into the aisle with my wife.

Seconds later I see him in the adjacent aisle, focusing on us. When he sees me looking at him he turns away and aimlessly walks a few steps in both directions in his aisle before eventually entering an additional aisle over. I moved closer to my wife then looked over again at the young man... looking hard at us again. This time I lock eyes with him, making sure he knows I noticed his stares. He immediately leaves the aisle and I loose sight of him. I moved around a little to find him to no avail. Never once did I see him look at any merchandise on the shelves.

'"C'mon," I took my wife's arm and led her to the back of the store near the pharmacy. She was understandably confused so I explained what was happening while continuing my scan of the store. It was then I saw the young man hurrying out the front door.

Wife asks me, "Are you carrying?"
"Of course."
"On you now?"
"Yes."

We were walking to the checkout counter while I'm giving my wife more details when the same guy comes hustling down the adjacent aisle in the opposite direction. Again I locked eyes with him and he quickly looked away, jerking his cell phone to his ear. We paid, left the store, got in our car. "Hang on, Hon."

Sure enough, the kid comes out the door. When he sees us sitting there, he abruptly stops and again raises his cell phone.

We pulled into the parking lot of a convenience store across the road. The guy waits for a few minutes. The gets in his car and drives slowly past the convenience store. We stayed there 'till he was completely out of sight then left.

Wife asks me, "Call the police?"
"He's done nothing illegal... yet."

We saw no more of him.

I've racked my brains trying to understand what his motives were and why he was checking us out so intently. My wife does irritate other drives when she's behind the wheel, but I was not aware of anything she had done on our drive to the store that would set someone off. And we certainly weren't in a good place for this guy to try robbing/mugging us.

Very confused, and a bit rattled.
 
Huh, sounds like he was stalking you. He may have done it from a distance and you didn't notice him so he got closer and this time you did notice him. May be doing this to see what type of reaction he got from you. All in some plans on maybe robbing, or harming you or her in some way.

Either that or he was out of his mind. High or crazy. Either way just be on the lookout. You might want to go to the police station and tell them about it. Sometimes you can ask for increased police patrols where you live.

Btw, no you're not being paranoid. I would have probably reacted similarly.
 
I wasn't there and sometimes it's something sublime about a situation that gives one that intuition or vibe that something isn't right, but if I had to cast a vote one way or the other based on your description I would say you were being paranoid.

If some stranger kept staring at me and making eye contact with me like you did, I would probably look back like you are crazy and he may have been thinking the same thing about you.
 
I think if I were you, I would definitely inform the police of the incident so there would be some record of the incident if something were to happen. If nothing comes of it, no harm no foul, but it will be beneficial to you if something did happen and you end up seeing this guy again. I don't think you are being paranoid, and it would not hurt a thing to report this. You never know what is going through a persons mind anymore.
 
I wasn't there and sometimes it's something sublime about a situation that gives one that intuition or vibe that something isn't right, but if I had to cast a vote one way or the other based on your description I would say you were being paranoid.

If some stranger kept staring at me and making eye contact with me like you did, I would probably look back like you are crazy and he may have been thinking the same thing about you.

You may be right. Before I "Locked eyes" I was able to observe him in the opposite aisle. As I said in my OP... he NEVER looked at or purchased any merchandise.

I've been around for a while... I don't spook easy.
 
Also had kind of a incident this morning coming out of a local restaurant this morning for breakfast. A pan handler starts over towards me asking if I had 50 cents. Was something about this guy that set off my radar in my head. Living in a large city like Cleveland I run into these people down on their luck. But this guy was different, so I held my left hand in the universal stop sign position. I told him I couldn't help him today, while turning to a more defensive angle. I did have my carry on me and am happy to report he stopped his advance.

Like your incident shows it pays never to let your guard down so one can avoid trouble. I pray that I never have to pull my gun!
 
Sounds like a good reason for heightened awareness, which is how you responded. He may have been looking for an opportunity to rob you, he may have been overwhelmed by your wife's good looks, he may have been stoned out of his mind, or he may have simply been bored and walking around the store for exercise. Being watchful is the right response.
 
First of all, trust your gut. Second, your first job is to keep your wife safe, not concern yourself if you've offended someone or not.

He might have been there to shoplift and you happened to notice him.

Or maybe he was completely out of his element, buying feminine supplies for his wife/girlfriend. He might have been nervous, acted it, and is now telling his friends about the "crazy guy staring me down".

We'll never know. But it doesn't matter because you avoided confrontation. Just keep your eyes peeled for a few days around your neighborhood.
 
Last edited:
I hope you didn't go straight home.
Next time get a picture with your cell phone, between the two of you this should be an easy task. The car and the plates, him if you can do it.
I agree this is fishy.
 
I did not get a license number... thought about it but suspected the dude would be out of the store quickly after we left. I didn't want to be caught out of my car and, as 1911 guy says, leave my wife's side.

I did phone my best friend... assistant DA in my county. He took down the information I had... appearance, make and color of car.
 
I hope you didn't go straight home.
Next time get a picture with your cell phone, between the two of you this should be an easy task. The car and the plates, him if you can do it.
I agree this is fishy.

Absolutely not, we drove in and out of parking lots in the area in case anyone was following. I kept my head on a swivel to see if anyone made moves consistent with ours.

IF this guy had bad intentions, I'm hoping he realizes he was "made" and made other plans.
 
Not paranoid at all. I have had people act oddly around me from time to time. Usually not much sense in contacting the police if nothing illegal was done. Staying alert and aware is paramount to avoiding confrontation where deadly force may need to be used.
 
I like what 1911 Guy said. To add, I'd make sure your wife knows about situational awareness and what to do if something happens.
 
I like what 1911 Guy said. To add, I'd make sure your wife knows about situational awareness and what to do if something happens.

Yep. Always caution her about checking surroundings. She's diligent about checking out her car before approaching and entering it.
 
Your not paranoid, situational awareness is the first step for a good defense. I have a story that is not personal like yours, but more opportunistic.
One night I pulled a 16 hour shift at work (till 23:00 hrs) and on the way home stopped at a little store that was open to get some coffee. While paying someone entered, but he kept his head down with his cap bill completely obscuring his face. He walked back to the furthest point of the store, looking I never did see his face. At this point, I am aware we are the only three people there. Exiting notice a his friend sitting in a truck waiting for him. I get in my truck and drive toward the highway, but do a U turn and position my passenger door less than 2' behind the bumper of their truck. Through the plate glass, chest high window I see him walk up to the counter still with his head down. The clerk is who I am really watching to see if she does any panicky moves. Evidently my bright red Chevy truck caught his eye because all of a sudden he looked straight out to where I was. I could see his mouth moving and she pointed to the direction my truck was facing. Once he started toward the door I pulled away from their truck, he got in and they left rather quickly in the opposite direction she pointed. So I pull back up to the store and ask her if everything is OK. She was not aware I had never left, but thought I did she might get robbed. I asked what he bought, nothing. He asked her where Port Arthur was (that was the pointing), I told her they headed the other way toward I-10. She thanked me for hanging around and told me next time my coffee would be free.
So if you are paranoid, then so am I along with a lot of other people I know. Paranoid must be the new norm!
 
Paranoid or not, no harm in being too careful! I mean you might hurt someone feelings lol but I would rather do that than something worse happen. I know I am paranoid but I can also tell you that my paranoia has saved my butt more than a few times overseas, even my families. Americans traveling abroad, depending on where you are, can instantly be painted targets. Keep us updated.

I just wonder what he was doing on his phone. It sounds to me like he had been following you guys, possibly for someone else and he was reporting back. Or he could have just thought you were crazy and he was on the phone telling whoever it was on the other line exactly the same type of stuff you are telling us lol. You just never know nowadays!
 
Not paranoid at all. I've had one or two similar encounters at home that never did turn into anything but I'm convinced we're very close to bad ones. Body language and being a young fit guy helped.

I've also had one particular encounter that went bad overseas.

In each case, I trusted my gut instincts and kept a cool head.
 
I just wonder what he was doing on his phone.
I never saw or heard him say a word on that phone. I think the phone was a ruse.

It sounds to me like he had been following you guys, possibly for someone else and he was reporting back.
I keep wondering that... and if he had been following me, I can't imagine why. We drive old cars, live in a modest house, and don't dress lavishly.
The idea that he was "reporting" to someone is even more frightening (assuming he actually was talking). We actually thought of that and kept up our vigilance driving home.

Magnuumpwr, that's quite an interesting story... and pretty bold action! Good on you!
 
I will admit I didn't read it all

But it is possible it was someone that worked there and was in loss prevention and was dressed in civilian clothes. If you go there again, see if you notice him again.

I've worked retail and pick up on the "security" people quite a bit.

This is just on possibility and he could be just a crazy person, stalker, robber, or even all three. It's good that you are keeping an eye on your surroundings
 
It's possible...possible, that he 'made' you carrying and got spooked, perhaps trying to notify authorities.

I've had a couple situations where people get sketched out and get flustered, not sure of what to do next.

But it is possible it was someone that worked there and was in loss prevention and was dressed in civilian clothes. If you go there again, see if you notice him again

This.
 
Get that cell phone out and take pics. Had this happen once and that's what I did. He left like his a$$ was on fire and his head was catchin'. Car, plates and him if possible. If things go wrong you still got the final solution.
 
Of course, the next question is, is your wife prepared to defend herself?

I've been very persistent in persuading my wife, adult daughters and daughters in law to get their concealed carry permits, and to be armed at all times. Most robberies/muggings are sneak attacks that unfold before the intended victim knows what has hit them.

I'm a big fan of compact firearms, super bright flashlights, and Sabre 3 in 1 spray for the ladies.
 
NorthBorder brings up what I was going to, and that's the possibility that he was intrigued by your wife.

Mine is actually pretty hot, and has had her fair share of extra-long looks, some of which have gone into unnerving territory.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top