Best Caliber Against Monkeys?
- Thread starter TBeck
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You folks laugh now, but when they take over the world, we're really gonna need Charlton Heston back. He's the only one with experience on how to deal with monkeys in control.
(Drops to knees at the foot of a half-buried Statue of Liberty)
"D@#$ you all!!!. D@#$ you all to H$%$!!!"
(Drops to knees at the foot of a half-buried Statue of Liberty)
"D@#$ you all!!!. D@#$ you all to H$%$!!!"
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/02/22/AR2007022201007.html
I had forgotten to mention before that theyd begun to exhibit tool-making. That, coupled with evidence of organization and coordinated attacks starts to look grim...
Also, lol at "anything with a banana clip"
I had forgotten to mention before that theyd begun to exhibit tool-making. That, coupled with evidence of organization and coordinated attacks starts to look grim...
Also, lol at "anything with a banana clip"
oldironman
Member
Good grief, that would be kinda like hiring the Hell's Angels to police up our drug dealers, eh?
Halo is for Kids
Member
Finally, an real world application for the 5.7X28:
FN P90, available from the factory in the TACTICAL MONKEY DROPPER CONFIGURATION:
Killin monkeys is harder than you might think:
http://www.owensworld.com/flashgames/play-24.htm
FN P90, available from the factory in the TACTICAL MONKEY DROPPER CONFIGURATION:
Killin monkeys is harder than you might think:
http://www.owensworld.com/flashgames/play-24.htm
.223 is your best bet, preferably in anything with a large magazine. Shotgun will make noise and mess, but you'll need the range and faster follow-up for when its buddies run.
For a babboon I wouldn't trust anything smaller than 7.62x51. Those things are a lot stronger than you'd expect based on their size, and their fangs will tear a limb to bloody ribbons. They're also mob attackers, and as mentioned, smart.
For a babboon I wouldn't trust anything smaller than 7.62x51. Those things are a lot stronger than you'd expect based on their size, and their fangs will tear a limb to bloody ribbons. They're also mob attackers, and as mentioned, smart.
Slugless
Member
#9 -
A Rhodesian Ridgeback is not a good choice for a monkey attack dog, as in a "go get 'em boy". Well, mine would "go get 'em" once.
Now if the monkey attacked you, that's a different story although one of mine would probably wuss out. The boy dog would mix it up.
Some kind of big mutt with terrier in him would be the way to go.
What's the caliber to launch a big mutt? 16" rifled gun? I suppose a carronade would do the trick.
This is "Close Quarters Primate Combat" in urban territory. Lots of civilians around, rifles seem like a bad, bad idea. Monkeys are quick.
#4 shot from an intermediate sized barrel. You may have to pick 'em off high in trees, so a short barrel / 00 may not be the best choice.
A Rhodesian Ridgeback is not a good choice for a monkey attack dog, as in a "go get 'em boy". Well, mine would "go get 'em" once.
Now if the monkey attacked you, that's a different story although one of mine would probably wuss out. The boy dog would mix it up.Some kind of big mutt with terrier in him would be the way to go.
What's the caliber to launch a big mutt? 16" rifled gun? I suppose a carronade would do the trick.
This is "Close Quarters Primate Combat" in urban territory. Lots of civilians around, rifles seem like a bad, bad idea. Monkeys are quick.
#4 shot from an intermediate sized barrel. You may have to pick 'em off high in trees, so a short barrel / 00 may not be the best choice.
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Wes Janson
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*golf clap for Halo*
I wonder if it would be anything like fighting the insectoids in Halo 3 using the assault rifle (or maybe the SMG)?
I wonder if it would be anything like fighting the insectoids in Halo 3 using the assault rifle (or maybe the SMG)?
Seancass
Member
somebody had to quote that and say LOL!
strangelittleman
Member
A good, short levergun in either the; .357, .41, .44 mags, or in .30-30, .35 Rem., with a heavy handgun on one's side, preferably in the same caliber as the magnum pistol caiber leverguns, of course.
slabuda
Member
See with monkeys, just like people ya got to train em right. Most people are trained to be good and its only the few that are bad and need shootin. And as monkeys being primates like us they are easy to train.
Well I bet ya are asking how do you train a bunch of wild monkeys!?!
By killing a chicken thats how. See ya cant train a chicken at all, but the monkeys don't know that. They just see you trying to train one and laugh their arse off. Yea he tried that with us but we aint 'avin none of it, he must be 'avin a laugh.
Well what ya do is make it sit in the corner. Ya know "Sit!" "Stay" Well that dumb chicken dont know any better so he walks off. Ya pick him up and do it again "Sit" "Stay" Sure enough that little bstd walks off again. And again ya move him back and tell him to stay. Bout this time the monkeys are pissin themselves laughin to bits.
Thats when ya strike. Ya just pick up that damn chicken (Which by the way was meant for dinner any way) and chop off its little head. Heck pull an Ozzy and bites its head of for better effect on them stubborn monkeys. Toss the head to them little piss ants, pluck it and eat right in front of em.
Their eyes get really big round this time and when ya say "sit" they "SIT!"
Next group of little smart arse monkeys come by and act up ya say sit. Well they start to laugh and their buddies go WOA WOA WOA. SHHH thats one crazy fella ya better sit or your for dinner and were using yer head for footie!
Problem solved!
Well I bet ya are asking how do you train a bunch of wild monkeys!?!
By killing a chicken thats how. See ya cant train a chicken at all, but the monkeys don't know that. They just see you trying to train one and laugh their arse off. Yea he tried that with us but we aint 'avin none of it, he must be 'avin a laugh.
Well what ya do is make it sit in the corner. Ya know "Sit!" "Stay" Well that dumb chicken dont know any better so he walks off. Ya pick him up and do it again "Sit" "Stay" Sure enough that little bstd walks off again. And again ya move him back and tell him to stay. Bout this time the monkeys are pissin themselves laughin to bits.
Thats when ya strike. Ya just pick up that damn chicken (Which by the way was meant for dinner any way) and chop off its little head. Heck pull an Ozzy and bites its head of for better effect on them stubborn monkeys. Toss the head to them little piss ants, pluck it and eat right in front of em.
Their eyes get really big round this time and when ya say "sit" they "SIT!"
Next group of little smart arse monkeys come by and act up ya say sit. Well they start to laugh and their buddies go WOA WOA WOA. SHHH thats one crazy fella ya better sit or your for dinner and were using yer head for footie!
Problem solved!
bosshoff
Member
H & R .410.
Cannonball888
Member
As used in gorilla warfare.
USMC - Retired
Member
I actually hunted monkeys in Japan and got paid around $180 a tail for them by the Japanese government. The monkeys were actually targets of opertunity while we were hunting wild boar and sitka deer. Standard load was 000 buck. Worked like a charm. One things for certain, them things stink to high #@!!.
Crunker1337
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Can we please cut with the jokes and sarcasm? A person has actually DIED here. There are places in the world that monkeys are a very real threat to people especially children and the elderly.
If one is actively hunting a monkey, then a .223, slow, heavy bullet would do nicely. I've seen the guns that Indian officials use, they're mostly .303 Enfields. Those could also do nicely.
But for defense, when the monkey or a group of monkeys is attacking, a shotgun loaded with slugs is probably best. Shotguns are quite popular for defense in India, as are .44 Special revolvers. That could be devastating also.
A dog used as an alarm system of sorts would also be useful. Monkeys are generally afraid of dogs, they won't mess with them unless they have a big numerical advantage and they really need to. Stray dogs are common in India also, and it's not hard at all to find a nice one and make friends with it.
A note: exotic firearms such as automatic pistols, semiauto shotguns and rifles are not easily available at all in India unless you're a powerful gov't official. A 30-cal, 12 gauge pump action, or a .44 Special revolver is about as good as it gets.
Forgot to mention: it is socially acceptable to carry long sticks and even machetes down the street in India.
If one is actively hunting a monkey, then a .223, slow, heavy bullet would do nicely. I've seen the guns that Indian officials use, they're mostly .303 Enfields. Those could also do nicely.
But for defense, when the monkey or a group of monkeys is attacking, a shotgun loaded with slugs is probably best. Shotguns are quite popular for defense in India, as are .44 Special revolvers. That could be devastating also.
A dog used as an alarm system of sorts would also be useful. Monkeys are generally afraid of dogs, they won't mess with them unless they have a big numerical advantage and they really need to. Stray dogs are common in India also, and it's not hard at all to find a nice one and make friends with it.
A note: exotic firearms such as automatic pistols, semiauto shotguns and rifles are not easily available at all in India unless you're a powerful gov't official. A 30-cal, 12 gauge pump action, or a .44 Special revolver is about as good as it gets.
Forgot to mention: it is socially acceptable to carry long sticks and even machetes down the street in India.
The reason there are places in the world like that is because people in those places dont control the monkeys. They literally wont kill them or do anything to injure. (Except train larger and fiercer monkeys to attack them?????????????)
I know they are taught from day one, but any human being has enough intelligence to figure out that an animal is an animal and to defend themselves. I was taught some things from day one that I could see were wrong as I matured. Above the town where I live is an Amish man who was ex-communicated for fighting back when home intruders where attacking his family. He was taught differently, but instinctively he understood that when innocents are attacked, you must fight back!
Someone's gotta say it. May as well be me.
Oh please. We get a "What caliber for "_____" thread here once every 14.9 hours. Most of them tend to have this atmosphere about them.
Yes, someone died. And that is sad.
Perhaps enough reverance for that fact has not been explicitly stated, but it hardly justifies berating people for making a few comments.
I mean, we are talking about monkeys here. The complusion to say something is too strong.
Besides, MOST of us will NEVER see a monkey outside of a zoo. It becomes hard to imagine this. Most may not even realize how dangerous some primates can be.
If we are going to be so solemn, I have to question the point of even posting a thread "What caliber for monkeys?"
But then again, I think 99% of what caliber for "X" threads are pointless.
-- John
Crunker1337
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I agree Kentucky, and I can tell you from personal experience that Indian people are fighters. Ever seen a crowd of Indians beating on a robber or vandal? Scary.
I guess the problem is India is starting to be politically correct about animal control (relocation not education is the way! OMGZH SAVE TEH MONKEEZ). My cousin's uncle however, is more traditional. He keeps a shotgun at his house and farm, and frequently carries a .44. As a farm-boy, I'm totally sure that he'd have no qualms with blowing a monkey away. And let me tell you, they aren't the cute little cuddly animals that they're made out to be. Some are, but some monkeys are downright mean and many are capable of inflicting significant harm on small humans.
I have seen monkeys in the wild, indeed, in India, and they are not all nice. They have become accustomed to people and know to take advantage of them if possible. A monkey crawled onto my sister (10 years old) and looked into her purse for food. A big guy scared the monkey off by I think advancing on it fists raised. I personally waited for it to come back, and then shot at it a few times with my 6mm (airsoft gun). Maybe it will learn to not mess with people, but probably not as my actions were probably an isolated event.
I guess the problem is India is starting to be politically correct about animal control (relocation not education is the way! OMGZH SAVE TEH MONKEEZ). My cousin's uncle however, is more traditional. He keeps a shotgun at his house and farm, and frequently carries a .44. As a farm-boy, I'm totally sure that he'd have no qualms with blowing a monkey away. And let me tell you, they aren't the cute little cuddly animals that they're made out to be. Some are, but some monkeys are downright mean and many are capable of inflicting significant harm on small humans.
I have seen monkeys in the wild, indeed, in India, and they are not all nice. They have become accustomed to people and know to take advantage of them if possible. A monkey crawled onto my sister (10 years old) and looked into her purse for food. A big guy scared the monkey off by I think advancing on it fists raised. I personally waited for it to come back, and then shot at it a few times with my 6mm (airsoft gun). Maybe it will learn to not mess with people, but probably not as my actions were probably an isolated event.
I have encountered monkey troops in Taiwan, Vietnam, Cambodia and Thailand. They are aggressive and can swarm you if they feel threatened. Monkeys have teeth and jaws that can remove all your fingers in one bite and if they jump on you, they can take all the skin off your face (including your eyes) in a few seconds.
The real reason why there will be more encounters is because humans have encroached into their habitats to the point where they can no longer retreat.
I'd prefer shotgun loaded with 00 buck.
The real reason why there will be more encounters is because humans have encroached into their habitats to the point where they can no longer retreat.
I'd prefer shotgun loaded with 00 buck.
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