Gun laws in Heaven?

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Amadeus

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I was watching “Inside the Actor’s Studio with James Lipton†the other night. He ends each interview by asking his guest 5 questions. One of which is: If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive.

My answer – among other possibilities – is, “We’re a shall issue territory.â€

Got me thinking though. Are there gun laws in Heaven? What are they?
 
"Welcome to heaven! The gun store is the first door on the right. They're all free, even the full-auto stuff and the artillery. So's the ammunition!"

Somehow, I don't imagine heaven as having a lot of laws, or it wouldn't be heaven.
 
I hate to be a wet blanket, but...

Heaven is a kingdom, not a democracy. The King makes the rules/law. The good news is that we will be OK with whatever the rules are.
 
With all the strict entrance requirements, I'm not so sure... ;)

In Nirvana, you wouldn't even want guns. :uhoh: :( So I guess that's out for me.

Nirvana aside... it'd be fun to play around with reincarnation, passing a Springfield 1903 to yourself along the times. :D

But heaven? Yeah. Where the streets are paved with brass, and the twelve gates are made from Copper, wood, iron, lead, stainless steel, carbon fiber, bowling pins, pyrodex, precision-ground nitrogen-filled glass, paracord, a giant Hoppes can, and leather slings. The bells are replaced with empty M1 clips, the range is from 2 to 10,000 meters, etc...

Talk about going overboard...

:D

So heaven it is, then. :)
 
Well heaven is a prepared place for prepared people. Those who obey God's word and remains faithful til death will see heaven. But, it is a spiritual place. There will be no guns there! All of our guns, as well as everything else will be melted down! 2 Peter 3:10
 
it is a spiritual place. There will be no guns there! All of our guns, as well as everything else will be melted down! 2 Peter 3:10
Click to expand...


Sounds like Heaven is a little leftist. But hey --- if it's in exchange for eternal bliss I might be willing to work with it. I guess.
 
There may not be any guns in heaven, but there will be no need for them. The Lord will be able to fill our every desire. The Lord also can NOT stand any evil so there will be no need to protect yourself since all the evil guys are burning in an eternity of Hell without the peace that the Lord brings.

I won't preach here, but if you want to know more let me know.
 
Oh Gus, some people don't use their guns for evil purposes. Unless you consider shooting paper and steel as evil. There are other uses for them.

Now heaven's range facility with God as the range master would be interesting. After making a great shot then mumbling "good Lord did you see that" to yourself and immediately hearing "yes" would be a little unnerving at first. :uhoh:
 
If they are not used for evil then they are used for.....? Pleasure? I covered that when I said, "The Lord will be able to fill our every desire." All the fun you get from shooting will be surpassed by being in the presence of the Lord God Almighty. All the pleasures of this world will be surpassed by being with Him.

I'm sure if there is a range in Heaven it would be interesting to see how well Jesus, Peter, Paul, and anyone else there shoot and what is their favorite gun and what is their favorite caliber. Interesting thinking.
 
If heaven has any bowling pins and steel plates, we'll still need our guns. The trash must be taken out...for the children :D

Now if the brown paper men taped themselves up, now THATS what I'm talkin' about ;)
 
rule #1: no polymer!

rule #2: john moses browning is the range master.

rule #3: corrosive powders will be alchemically altered to be non-corrosive.

rule #4: all flyers can be recalled and redirected to the rest of the group, provided you give god all the glory.

rule #5: the ammo angel is NOT the same as the beer angel.

rule #6: while shooting in heaven, all alcoholic beverages will lose their intoxicating effects.

rule #7: on fridays a drawing will be held to select one lucky winner to take potshots at the devil or any brady minion currently residing in hell.

rule #8: wednesday will be known as "ballistic wednesday", and the laws of time/velocity/trajectory will be amended so everyone can learn/discuss/experiment with different loads and test out the new barrels wildalaska makes.

rule #9: slot reserved for future amendments.

rule #10: slot reserved for future amendments.
 
If there's no shooting in Heaven, why did God make John Moses Browning? You think he's up there playing harp!?!?

No telling what he, Sam Colt, Daniel Wesson, Paul Mauser, et. al are working on. Won't be too much longer and Mr. Kalashnikov and Jeff Cooper will be coming to that firing line in the sky, too.
 
In heaven the AR-15 is perfectly reliable and you never have to clean it.

In heaven you can hit the 800 meter gong every time, off hand, standing.

In heaven Gale McMillan is your shooting coach.

In heaven, all guns come with real ivory.

In heaven, you can try out John Moses Browning's new designs.

In heaven you can talk guns with John Wayne.

In heaven you can go hunting with Teddy Roosevelt & George Patton.

In heaven every pickup truck has a rifle rack in the rear window.

In heaven, you can stop at a roadside cafe and get a new S&W that's blued with no lock, an inch thick cut of medium rare prime rib done to perfection and still have change left over from a ten-spot for a tip.

In heavan....
 
A lightning range. Sorta like a .50 BMG competition for the pious. I like it.

Can we aim for houses or do we get penalized for smiting?
 
Oh my. All through reading this thread, I have been hearing a Weird Al song: "What if God smoked Cannibis?":scrutiny: :uhoh: And I dont know why.


Anyway, in Heaven you could hold any gun offhand and hit the gong at 800 meters, but that would be taking the challenge out of it. You have to keep the "rules" toggle-switch set to "earth", and not "Cool!". It would be really cool to take a Barrett single handedly and point downrange, pull the trigger (with only a mild push), and hear a gong being ripped to shreds.:D

And I would be able to get that "Photon gun I want too.
 
I don't see any anti-gun laws there. We'll all have them and we'll all be responsible. All the BG/miscreants/lowlifes won't be there with us anyway. Nothing wrong with sporting purposes, is there?
 
"The Lord will be able to fill our every desire." All the fun you get from shooting will be surpassed by being in the presence of the Lord God Almighty. All the pleasures of this world will be surpassed by being with Him.
Click to expand...
Then after getting to heaven do you just sit thru eternity? Seems you can't do anything pleasurable to you, or are you assigned tasks which gives you no pleasure (which by the way sounds like hell)?
 
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