"Gun Show Math!"

[duck911]

Does anyone else use "Gun Show Math" when justifying or explaining firearm related purchases? I try to rely heavily on this new breed of math to explain firearms that suddenly pop up in the safe to my wife.

Here's an example (note that anything in parenthesis that follows is between you and the gunstore only, and disclosure to the wife is OPTIONAL!) :

I purchased a shotgun for my teenager to learn to hunt, and I paid $200 (not including tax). Gander Mountain was running a 20% cash back (giftcard) promotion at the time. I ended up with a $200 gun and a $40 gift card.

I later sold the gun for $180, to fund a $300 muzzleloader I really wanted that was on sale for $250. Another 20% back on the muzzleloader via gift card (same promotion), and now I had a $300 muzzleloader for $250 and and the original $40 gift card and another $50 gift card from the muzzleloader for free.

I used the $90 in gift cards to buy (most of) a $250 scope that was on sale for $150. The scope wasn't quite what I needed so I sold it for a profit (if you only count the cash I used out of our checking account, Dear) for $125, which I used to pay the original $200 credit card bill from the shotgun mentioned earlier.

So, the way I figure it is, in the end the muzzleloader cost me $75!

See how that works? Here's another tip: recite the numbers and facts QUICKLY when explaining them.



My buddy is so good at this method, he has his wife CONVINCED that he usually gets PAID to buy a gun! My hero!!

Let's here yours....

--Duck911

 

[Kenneth Lew]

Don't be doing that fairly often especially at gun shows, you may give the impression to the public/ATF that you are dealing in firearms. '

 

[duck911]

Kenneth,

Loosen the chin strap on the tinfoil hat, I'm having a little FUN.

Icons suck as and and usually indicate that the thread you are reading may be slightly less than serious

--Duck911

 

[statelineblues]

I guess that would work better than "Honest, honey, the Kimber followed me home - can i keep it?"

 

[Old Fuff]

Isn't this the way the government explains the national budget??

 

[C-grunt]

Problem is...my wife would then shoot me with said 75 dollar muzzleloader.

 

[Majic]

What happened to the son learning to hunt?

 

[gyp_c2]

yup

... I get it...

...already divorced from usin' it though!

...BTW...where's that ROTFLMAO...thingee' when you need it...

 

[hunttheevil]

I just tell the wife i'm going to going to get a new firearm. Worked this weekend when I got the Saiga 308-1 for $325.00. I don't complain about her pile of shoes neither.

 

[22-rimfire]

Gun show math is good. Don't you know they are all investments?

If my wife shot, we'd probably have twice as many guns and price would be no object... based on her buying habits.

 

[HKUSP45C]

I gotta go along with HuntTheEvil on this one.

 

[duck911]

I was obviously just trying to have fun with this thread - although my buddy IS the king of Gun Show Math and that's what inspired the post. Luckily, I don't have the need to hold anything back from my wife.

That isn't to say I don't have to PLAN for purchases however. We save **aggressively** for retirement and emergencies, including cash, 401K, roth, etc, etc. So, if I want a gun it may take me a few months to save the cash for it, especially if it's an expensive one.

And yes, my stepdaughter still has her 20 gauge and in fact came goose hunting with me this weekend.

Boy, you guys can sure suck the fun out of a thread

 

[Sunray]

That's the kind of math that drives gun shop accountants crazy. Simplified, a shop takes two rifles plus some cash for one of the rifles in stock. One of the trade ins gets sold for cash, the other sits for a while then gets sold along with another rifle that's been sitting for a long while, said rifle is sold for a lower price just to be rid of it. Balance the books. Makes non-shooting accountants burst into tears. The shooting accountant would have traded his services for firearms.

 

[Cliff47]

Makes perfect sense to me, but then I'm single, so that I don't have to explain why something 'followed me home' from the last show. It's still cheaper than chasing women.....

 

[M2Pilot]

I thought it was funn7 & enjoyed the post. Thanks Duck.

 

[SoCalShooter]

my wife

Nice math but the root of your problem is "my wife" remove this issue and there is no issue.

 

[grizz]

1 kidney sold on Chinese black market = $7,500.00.

1 Barrett M82A1 = $7,500.00. Coincidence? I don't think so.

 

[CrazySpyder69]

Am I the only one on her with a woman who strongly supports my lust for fire arms? I got a little Savage .22 and now she wants one. She wants me to get the black powder gun that her Dad is supposedly suppose to get me for xmas. AND supports my decision for me wanting to get a 12 gauge. Money is the only thing stopping me at this point.

Sorry to ruin yer fun guys!

 

[22-rimfire]

It really comes down to how much money you have and what you earn. That is simple math. More money=more guns.

These threads are fun, but the responses are somwhat canned as we have done them before.

 

[Nightcrawler]

Reminds me of Special Forces Beer Math, taught to me by some SF guys I've known. Essentially, if you do your calculations right, an eight man team will require sixty-four cases of beer.

 

[pangris]

It is a matter of conditioning. Before we got married, my wife and I were at dinner with a friend. He was struggling because his girlfriend was an anti, but he really liked her. She wanted him to at least trim back the collection.

My advice (in front of my future wife) was to drop her like a hot rock, because no matter how much he liked her, she didn't get him... and if she didn't get him and he was willing to act against his nature, it was doomed anyway. I explained that in my opinion it wasn't about the guns themselves, but understanding that he was a warrior at heart, and that 10,000 years ago, he and I would have been the guys slaughtering mastadons, not planting crops. A woman that couldn't understand our need to own and be proficient with our tools would never truly understand him, and therefore they could never achieve true happiness.

He broke up with her and went on to join the FBI and is now on their regional SWAT team.

My wife has never questioned one of my acquisitions or training classes. She even owns a few and trains a little herself!

 

[SASS#23149]

Kidney for sale !! Kidney for sale!!!

WOW. 1 of my kidneys is gonna have to learn to speak chinese!!
I could by a mighty nice riflegun for what that little piece of meat would bring.

 

[mikedavis120]

No Babe you don't understand, i got it cause the others were lonely.

 

[TexasRifleman]

Don't you know they are all investments?

Exactly. I only buy Investment Grade firearms; ask my wife

 

[Furncliff]

I just pout...

til I get what I want.


I know it's unmanly but subversive tactics need to be exercised occasionally.