Is this a good letter to my university newspaper?

[the naked prophet]

I'm planning to send this to my university newspaper, please let me know if this needs some rewriting.

Bailey CO, September 27, 2006. An unidentified gunman entered a Platt Canyon High School, took 6 girls hostage and possibly raped some of them before shooting and killing one of them and then himself.

Weston WI, September 29, 2006. A disgruntled student came to school armed. The Principal was shot while disarming the student, giving opportunity for others nearby to tackle the shooter.

Lancaster County PA, October 2, 2006. An unknown gunman entered a one-room schoolhouse and took several hostages, eventually killing at least three and injuring seven before killing himself.

There are two common threads in all three shootings that have taken place in schools this past week. 1. All the shootings took place in a "gun free zone" and 2. The Good Guys With Guns did not show up in time to stop the Bad Guys With Guns. It should be clear by now that the "gun free schools" policy does not work.

Current laws (both federal and state, as well as school policies) forbid guns on school property. The people who plan to shoot teachers and students obviously do not care about a "gun free school" law any more than they care about the laws against murder. The police are good people who do their best - but they can't be everywhere at once. The only people who are at the scene of the crime when it happens are the shooter and the victims. That leaves only the victims to protect themselves. "Gun free school" laws only disarm the victims and give the attackers peace of mind that nobody can stop them until the police arrive.

In light of the obviously failed "no guns" policy, the victims should be able to arm themselves. Responsible adults who have concealed carry permits (background checks, training, minimum age, etc.) should be allowed to carry in schools: administration, teachers, staff, and in the case of colleges, adult students. It takes a minimum of training to safely and effectively operate a handgun - a few weeks ago Margaret Johnson, an elderly wheelchair-bound grandmother in New York City, shot a mugger who was strangling her. One teacher with a gun in a nearby classroom could quickly end a shooting rampage.

Pearl MS, October 1997. A student brought a rifle to Pearl High School and fired dozens of rounds before Joel Myrick, the Vice Principal, could run a quarter of a mile to his truck to retrieve his own gun. Myrick returned to school (violating several laws) and held the shooter at gunpoint until the police arrived. The shooter had planned to drive to the nearby Junior High and continue his rampage while the police were at the High School.

Grundy VA, January 16, 2002. A failing student at the Appalachian Law School brought a pistol to campus and shot six, killing three including the Dean and a professor. The shooting was stopped by two students who went to their vehicles and retrieved their own pistols (violating school policy) to hold the shooter at gunpoint until police arrived.

In these cases, the time required to go get the gun allowed more innocents to be murdered. If these people had been allowed to carry a gun with them, they could have stopped the shooting more quickly. Perhaps if John Klang had been allowed to carry a gun in Weston Wisconsin last week when he confronted the shooter, this hero would still be alive. The policy that prevented him from carrying a gun did not prevent a murder-minded teenager from carrying a gun. Decades of experience with concealed carry in several states show that there have been no problems with in any location where it is allowed and in some states even in schools.

We need to change stupid laws that do not stop murders from killing at school, that only prevent innocent victims from being able to protect themselves. We need to pressure state lawmakers to remove schools from the list of places prohibited from concealed carry. We need to pressure our national lawmakers to repeal the federal "Gun Free School Zones" law. We need to pressure University officials to change the policy regarding legally carried guns on campus. Until this happens, the people in charge of these policies are responsible for every shooting that occurs in these places where by law only the murderers are allowed to have guns.

 

[MatthewVanitas]

Well-written, but WAY too long. Take a glance at the editorial page of your U paper: how short/long are the other editorials?

People will not read things unless their interest balances out the length of the document.


Trim it down to be as short as or shorter than other editorials in your U paper. Avoid petty words like "stupid", and make sure that you sound as neutral as possible. Make it easy and smooth to read while presenting the _simplest_ variant of your argument.

Best of all, get one or two gun-neutral friends to read your draft version and comment on its bias, ease of reading, and how interesting they find that. The crueller and pickier the friend, the better.

-MV

 

[the naked prophet]

This is as short as I could get it. They have printed longer letters from me.

Bailey CO, September 27, 2006. An unidentified gunman entered a Platt Canyon High School, took 6 girls hostage and possibly raped some of them before shooting and killing one of them and then himself.

Weston WI, September 29, 2006. A disgruntled student came to school armed. The Principal was shot while disarming the student, giving opportunity for others nearby to tackle the shooter.

Lancaster County PA, October 2, 2006. An unknown gunman entered a one-room schoolhouse and took several hostages, eventually killing at least three and injuring seven before killing himself.

There are two common threads in all three shootings that have taken place in schools this past week. 1. All the shootings took place in a "gun free zone" and 2. The Good Guys With Guns did not show up in time to stop the Bad Guys With Guns. It should be clear by now that the "gun free schools" policy does not work.

Current laws (both federal and state, as well as school policies) forbid guns on school property. The people who plan to shoot teachers and students obviously do not care about a "gun free school" law any more than they care about the laws against murder. The police are good people who do their best - but they can't be everywhere at once. The only people who are at the scene of the crime when it happens are the perpetrator and the victims. That leaves only the victims to protect themselves. "Gun free school" laws only disarm the victims and give the attackers peace of mind that nobody can stop them until the police arrive.

In light of the obviously failed "no guns" policy, the victims should be able to arm themselves. Responsible adults who have concealed carry permits (background checks, training, minimum age, etc.) should be allowed to carry in schools: administration, teachers, staff, and in the case of colleges, adult students. Decades of experience with concealed carry in several states show that there have been no problems with in any location where it is allowed and in some states even in schools.

Pearl MS, October 1997. A student brought a rifle to Pearl High School and fired dozens of rounds before Joel Myrick, the Vice Principal, could run a quarter of a mile to his truck to retrieve his own gun. Myrick returned to school (violating several laws) and held the shooter at gunpoint until the police arrived. The shooter had planned to drive to the nearby Junior High and continue his rampage while the police were at the High School.

Grundy VA, January 16, 2002. A failing student at the Appalachian Law School brought a pistol to campus and shot six, killing three including the Dean and a professor. The shooting was stopped by two students who went to their vehicles and retrieved their own pistols (violating school policy) to hold the shooter at gunpoint until police arrived.

We need to change dangerous laws that do not stop murders from killing at school, that only prevent innocent victims from being able to protect themselves. We need to pressure state lawmakers to remove schools from the list of places prohibited from concealed carry. We need to pressure our national lawmakers to repeal the federal "Gun Free School Zones" law. We need to pressure University officials to change the policy regarding legally carried guns on campus. Until this happens, the people in charge of these policies are responsible for every shooting that occurs in these places where by law only the murderers are allowed to have guns.

 

[RioShooter]

I only wish my students could write as well. Good job.

 

[Werewolf]

Too long? Too short - depends on the erudition and interest of the reader. Seems fine to me but the message is one I agree with.

You've put together an excellent editorial that probably will not go over well in a university newspaper. Be prepared for a round of criticism from a lot of yung'uns who still filter their thoughts thru their hearts instead of going directly from brain to mouth or pen.

How do I know you'll get blasted - at the University of Oklahoma while I was there the honors program was running short of money. I wrote a letter to the editor suggesting that money be taken from the athletics (specifically the football) budget to offset the shortfall. Does the word pariah mean anything to you. Hell - I got veiled death threats in not a few responses and after a week the head letters to the editor guy had to put in a notice to the effect that no more letters to the editor referencing my heinous suggestion would be accepted.

 

[mattf7184]

Good letter. My school paper would not publish one that long though. If yours will then definately go for it. I like it and feel the same way. The school I go to now is not in the best area, but the state does not feel I have the right to protect myself there.

 

[critter]

I think you have made one serious mistake. You have assumed that the academic leaders can address this subject logically. They can't, won't, don't.

 

[LkWinnipesaukee]

Be sure to include the shooting today in PA

 

[American By Blood]

Bailey CO, September 27, 2006. An unidentified gunman entered a Platt Canyon High School, took 6 girls hostage and possibly raped some of them before shooting and killing one of them and then himself.

Weston WI, September 29, 2006. A disgruntled student came to school armed. The Principal was shot while disarming the student, giving opportunity for others nearby to tackle the shooter.

Lancaster County PA, October 2, 2006. An unknown gunman entered a one-room schoolhouse and took several hostages, eventually killing at least three and injuring seven before killing himself.

There are two common threads in all three shootings that have taken place in schools this past week. 1. All the shootings took place in a "gun free zone" and 2. The Good Guys With Guns did not show up in time to stop the Bad Guys With Guns. It should be clear by now that the "gun free schools" policy does not work.

Current laws (both federal and state, as well as school policies) forbid guns on school property. The people who plan to shoot teachers and students obviously do not care about a "gun free school" law any more than they care about the laws against murder. The police are good people who do their best - but they can't be everywhere at once. The only people who are at the scene of the crime when it happens are the shooter and the victims. That leaves only the victims to protect themselves. "Gun free school" laws only disarm the victims and give the attackers peace of mind that nobody can stop them until the police arrive.

In light of the obviously failed "no guns" policy, the victims should be able to arm themselves. Responsible adults who have concealed carry permits (background checks, training, minimum age, etc.) should be allowed to carry in schools: administration, teachers, staff, and in the case of colleges, adult students. It takes a minimum of training to safely and effectively operate a handgun - a few weeks ago Margaret Johnson, an elderly wheelchair-bound grandmother in New York City, shot a mugger who was strangling her. One teacher with a gun in a nearby classroom could quickly end a shooting rampage.

Pearl MS, October 1997. A student brought a rifle to Pearl High School and fired dozens of rounds before Joel Myrick, the Vice Principal, could run a quarter of a mile to his truck to retrieve his own gun. Myrick returned to school (violating several laws) and held the shooter at gunpoint until the police arrived. The shooter had planned to drive to the nearby Junior High and continue his rampage while the police were at the High School.

Grundy VA, January 16, 2002. A failing student at the Appalachian Law School brought a pistol to campus and shot six, killing three including the Dean and a professor. The shooting was stopped by two students who went to their vehicles and retrieved their own pistols (violating school policy) to hold the shooter at gunpoint until police arrived.

In these cases, the time required to go get the gun allowed more innocents to be murdered. If these people had been allowed to carry a gun with them, (drop the comma) they could have stopped the shooting more quickly. Perhaps if John Klang had been allowed to carry a gun in Weston Wisconsin last week when he confronted the shooter, (drop the comma) this hero would still be alive. The policy that prevented him from carrying a gun did not prevent a murder-minded teenager from carrying a gun. Decades of experience with allowing concealed carry for anyone of age and not legally disqualified in thirty seven states show that there have been no problems with it in any location where it is allowed. In some states the practice is permitted even in schools.

We need to change unjust and ineffective laws that do not stop murderers from killing at school, but instead only prevent innocent victims from being able to protect themselves. We need to pressure state lawmakers to remove schools from the list of places prohibited from concealed carry. We need to pressure our national lawmakers to repeal the federal "Gun Free School Zones" law. We need to pressure University officials to change the policy regarding legally carried guns on campus. Until this happens, the people in charge of these policies are responsible for every shooting that occurs in these places where by law only the murderers are allowed to have guns.

Corrections and suggestions in red.

Excellent piece. Well written and reasoned.

Were I you, though, I'd devote a few sentences to anticipating the "just ban all guns" argument and to the fact that about a million gun crimes are committed per annum while there are millions of instances of lawful self defense using firearms each year. My hunch is that most of the folks who read your school's paper believe that armed self defense is the exception instead of the rule.

 

[Superpsy]

Best of all, get one or two gun-neutral friends to read your draft version and comment on its bias, ease of reading, and how interesting they find that. The crueller and pickier the friend, the better.

good advice. I second this...I thought the letter was a good one! Let us know if they print it and what the response is...

 

[The Grand Inquisitor]

First off it is way too long and it is also not an editorial, but rather a little essay. You need to be able to to make your point in both long and short format.


Werewolf - I'm at the University of Iowa and I was once shouted down for bringing up the fact that the combined athletic budget each year is around 28 million (with only 15.1 million being put back in by athletic generated revenue) and yet the University yearly insists that they cannot possibly find another 50K to hire another Religious Studies professor (even though 2 have retired within the past year).

Athletics seem to find a way to increase their budgets every year, yet our little religous studies and Asian languages and Literature departments (which are both prestigious departments) have to work with declining budgets every year.

In fact, this year our Sanskrit prof is in India doing research, and one of the Ph.D students is filling his spot teaching Sanskrit, but at TA pay instead of full pay.

Although it must be worse at a University where the University president actually wrote a letter about his coniption fit over an officating mistake in a football game.

 

[James T Thomas]

open minds

Your article is just fine. Take all the revision or corrections with a "grain of salt."

Unfortunately, you will not be able to dodge that bullet at your institution of higher learning.

Be prepared.

Logic will in most cases, not be applied.

Arguments or rebuttals will come at you with greater invective than you are expecting.

You will not receive the "tolerance" from your classmates that old Noah Webster defined, but instead there will be intolerance for you. Expect it even from your teacher.

Tell us how it went.

 

[taliv]

i agree with your conclusion. but i would be exceptionally careful in stating it.


your last paragraph is less logic and more rhetoric.
'stupid' is basically just name-calling and doesn't support your argument.

Until this happens, the people in charge of these policies are responsible for every shooting that occurs in these places where by law only the murderers are allowed to have guns.

this would only be true if ccw could actually stop these murders. for that to be even remotely accurate, you'd have to show that ccw has stopped murders in non-gun-free zones, which obviously isn't the case (although i believe it has positively affected it, it certainly hasn't eliminated it). further, the law obviously doesn't allow murderers to have guns so saying murderers are allowed to have guns isn't helpful.

 

[cavman]

I like it, especially the real-life situations in the beginning and middle. They add to the nice flow.

cavman

 

[the naked prophet]

I did remove the word stupid from the last paragraph in the shortened version on post #3.

I would just like to point out that in the only class I'm taking this semester, I know at least one other student who has CCW. The gun range of which I'm a member is owned and operated by a couple of professors in my department. I know there are some people who think like I do.

I have had a lot of flak for previous letters to the editor. I'm teaching now, so I really wonder how that will affect things, which I hadn't thought of before.

 

[Werewolf]

I have had a lot of flak for previous letters to the editor. I'm teaching now, so I really wonder how that will affect things, which I hadn't thought of before.

It is easy to take a stand when there are no consequences...

 

[taliv]

do other professors submit letters? i kind of thought the school news paper was mostly by/for students

 

[Jonathan]

I think you need to basically chop off the last part of the essay. It will be much more effective if you "raise the question". State the facts, end with comments that existing laws and policies are not working. A person who arrives at the obvious conclusion will think themselves so much more intelligent than if someone else forces the exact same conclusion upon them.

 

[poppy]

prophet

Until this happens, the people in charge of these policies are responsible for every shooting that occurs in these places where by law only the murderers are allowed to have guns.

The killer is the one responsible, not the school administrators. Remember, the anti's say the gun manufacturers are responsible for killings. Also, the murderer is not "allowed" to have guns at a school.

That sentence is better left out completely.

I too agree it is well written, but too long.

 

[The Grand Inquisitor]

Everyone that has made a post saying that the University would not accept a pro-2nd Amend. editorial because they are dogmatically opposed to firearm ownership are as equally dogmatic and intolerant of the views of others as the bugbears you believe the outside world to be.

Even though Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity will not tell you so, those in academia are some of the most tolerant and understanding people you will find. Even though a portion of those in academia are against firearm ownership they will by and large (of course there are exceptions) disagree with you and will happily debate you, they will not suppress your ideas but would actually be happy that you are becoming engaged in the debate over ideas.

 

[DogBonz]

Too long... Too short

Just remember what one of my professors said when someone asked “how long should this paper be?”. He replied, “Whenever you write, think of a woman’s skirt… Long enough to cover what needs to be covered… Short enough to keep it interesting.”