Kerry: I was abducted by aliens, they support my presidential bid

[GunWares]

Kerry: I was abducted by aliens, despite anal probe they support my presidential bid

Mongo (REUTERS) - John Kerry announced today that he has been abducted by aliens three times since announcing his bid for the presidency. He said in each of the three encounters he was "probed," but that the aliens also said they hoped he prevailed in the November election. When asked what planet the aliens came from, Kerry said he could not reveal that information. He stated, "if I reveal the home planet of these fine creatures, they might stop visiting me, and I have really come to enjoy their probes." Kerry attended the press conference wearing a pair of designer antennae by Gucci of Mongo.

Kerry speaks with reporters

 

[cdbeaver]

You, sir, are a sicko.

 

[clubsoda22]

Actually, i thought it was funny.

 

[Lone_Gunman]

Yes, and very intelligent as well.

 

[TheBluesMan]

Pointless. Low Road. Closed.