30 cal slob
Member
lol.
now where did i put my skirt?
now where did i put my skirt?
LEO Weirdness re: spouse applying for CCW
- Thread starter 30 cal slob
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I have to agree with cheygriz on the cultural thing. The guy who taught my CCW class is both a friend of mine and a local LEO. He has been helping me for quite a while in trying to talk my wife into the course.
She has no objections to firearms, she just needs to work through a few mechanical fears. She loves revolvers, but (when it comes to autos
) still has a problem with racking the slide, despite having read PAX's web site time and again. She keeps saying "I'm not strong enough" (she used to lift weights in highschool and college, so I know she's a strong woman). "Technique, my dear." Once she masters it and gets in some more range time, she promises she'll take the class.
She has no objections to firearms, she just needs to work through a few mechanical fears. She loves revolvers, but (when it comes to autos
) still has a problem with racking the slide, despite having read PAX's web site time and again. She keeps saying "I'm not strong enough" (she used to lift weights in highschool and college, so I know she's a strong woman). "Technique, my dear." Once she masters it and gets in some more range time, she promises she'll take the class.
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30 cal slob
Member
my wife is somewhat in the same situation - she's not fond of guns but she has to at the very minimum understand them since they are part of my dna.
it's a bit of a struggle to get her to go to the range to practice.
was a big struggle to get her to take her first NRA safety course (back in '99), and she wouldn't sign up for her CCW after that course.
so i had to dangle a bunch of carrots for her to take the course again and do all the work to get the CCW process rolling. i think what was different this time around is that she realizes she is responsible for the safety and well-being of little ones, which may have colored her decision to finally take the plunge. while she doesn't like guns, i have absolutely no doubt in my mind that she would use one to protect our children.
i want her to have the permit JUST IN CASE she needs to use it.
too often, it's almost too late when you realize you need a CCW and you can't wait 60 days to get it.
it's a bit of a struggle to get her to go to the range to practice.
was a big struggle to get her to take her first NRA safety course (back in '99), and she wouldn't sign up for her CCW after that course.
so i had to dangle a bunch of carrots for her to take the course again and do all the work to get the CCW process rolling. i think what was different this time around is that she realizes she is responsible for the safety and well-being of little ones, which may have colored her decision to finally take the plunge. while she doesn't like guns, i have absolutely no doubt in my mind that she would use one to protect our children.
i want her to have the permit JUST IN CASE she needs to use it.
too often, it's almost too late when you realize you need a CCW and you can't wait 60 days to get it.
Axman
Member
SWModel19 said:
Must be one of those "semi-automatic assault revolvers" I keep reading about in the misinformed newspaper!
30 cal slob
Member
affirmative
Zundfolge
Member
SWModel19 said:
Axman said:Must be one of those "semi-automatic assault revolvers" I keep reading about in the misinformed newspaper!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mateba_Autorevolver
There's a t-shirt if I ever saw one.pax said:
Titan6
member
My wife hates automatics even though she can shoot them just fine. Too ugly. Now her Python on the other hand is beautiful....
I still don't know how she hits the ten ring at 25 yards with it. She just smiles sweetly and says 'It knows it's owner'....
I still don't know how she hits the ten ring at 25 yards with it. She just smiles sweetly and says 'It knows it's owner'....
tydephan
Member
30,
This subject, and your initial thoughts (first post), made me feel awkward as well. "Guilty, until proven innocent," it seems.
A lot of the questioning was unnecessary (at least by my standards). But I think (and I could be wrong) that there is a bigger issue here that perhaps the officers are picking up on (a blatant assumption on my part) and that's the fact that SHE doesn't necessarily want the CCW. By your own admission and the words above it seems that she is very hesitant about guns in general. It would seem logical that she has not gone through a lot of the mental preparation that is required when the decision is made to CCW. By the way she has been characterized in this thread, it seems as though she is not prepared to carry.
I am not criticizing or making any type of allegations, because I am in the same situation. I have often wondered if I should try harder to get my wife to understand the importance of carrying a concealed weapon. Unfortunately to this day, she has voiced no interest. It worries me sick, as we have small children as well.
I may be completely wrong. She may be very open to the idea and completely aware of the prospective decisions and associated responsibilities. If so, I sincerely apologize.
As I said, I bring up these thoughts mainly as an exercise for us both and the general discussion of the thread, not in any way as criticism for your actions.
I remember reading about an abused husband who went to the local police station for help and when he told the police that his wife has severely beaten him up, was asked "Well, what did you do that made her beat you?" - the implication being, of course, that he had to have done something wrong because we all know that men beat women and never the other way around.
It must be uncomfortable at the very least to be on the wrong side of cultural bias
It must be uncomfortable at the very least to be on the wrong side of cultural bias
30 cal slob
Member
tydephan,
yes, she was/is a somewhat reluctant CCW applicant.
however, the police jumped on her with the weird questioning before they ascertained that.
as an aside ... in my state you need to have a "pistol permit" to transport a handgun outside the home. It is also an unrestricted carry permit (subject to fairly few off-limits places...compared to other states).
if i croak ... and she doesn't have a pistol permit, the police will come in and take my guns away, thereby putting my firearms investment at considerable risk. if she has the CCW, she can dispose of the firearms at her leisure (as in THR fire sale, lol).
this was one consideration.
the other is that we've had a string of recent armed robberies in our otherwise quiet neighborhood, and that had me concerned about home safety. i figured this was a good time for my wife to get a refresher course on safe handling of firearm and lawful use of deadly force. I figured if she took the course a SECOND time, she might as well get the permit.
You're right, she's not ready to carry (and I'm not going to force it on her at all). But I would like her to have the choice if circumstances require.
yes, she was/is a somewhat reluctant CCW applicant.
however, the police jumped on her with the weird questioning before they ascertained that.
as an aside ... in my state you need to have a "pistol permit" to transport a handgun outside the home. It is also an unrestricted carry permit (subject to fairly few off-limits places...compared to other states).
if i croak ... and she doesn't have a pistol permit, the police will come in and take my guns away, thereby putting my firearms investment at considerable risk. if she has the CCW, she can dispose of the firearms at her leisure (as in THR fire sale, lol).
this was one consideration.
the other is that we've had a string of recent armed robberies in our otherwise quiet neighborhood, and that had me concerned about home safety. i figured this was a good time for my wife to get a refresher course on safe handling of firearm and lawful use of deadly force. I figured if she took the course a SECOND time, she might as well get the permit.
You're right, she's not ready to carry (and I'm not going to force it on her at all). But I would like her to have the choice if circumstances require.
30 cal slob
Member
in our state, the local LEO does the initial application processing for CCW's.
i believe it's a rule that ya gotta come in and get the fingerprinting done locally. I understand that other states allow non-LEO fingerprint techs to get the prints done ... but I think the print card in our state has to bear a LEO signature and badge number or something like that.
anyhoo, our town just switched over from messy ink prints to digital scanning. the wifey was okay with the CT prints but got a little annoyed with UT hand mess.
i believe it's a rule that ya gotta come in and get the fingerprinting done locally. I understand that other states allow non-LEO fingerprint techs to get the prints done ... but I think the print card in our state has to bear a LEO signature and badge number or something like that.
anyhoo, our town just switched over from messy ink prints to digital scanning. the wifey was okay with the CT prints but got a little annoyed with UT hand mess.
Cybrludite
Member
A lady-friend of mine is big into martial arts, and the sparring occasionally results in bruises. She gets the "Honey, is there anything you'd like to tell us?" routine all the time.
tydephan
Member
By all means, have her get a CCW, as you might have something your collection that I like.
Fair enough on all counts. Your reasoning regarding the local laws and for the protection of your collection makes perfect sense to me.
Very keen thoughts. Hope everything turns out good and the unnecessary inquisition is over soon!
30 cal slob
Member
tydephan,
thanks for your thoughts.
at the end of all this, there's no HARM in my wife getting a CCW.
for all my wife cares ... it's just another hunk of plastic taking up space in her wallet.
she will have the option to use it if she needs to.
as far as her reluctance to apply ... i will reiterate ... bribery works.
thanks for your thoughts.
at the end of all this, there's no HARM in my wife getting a CCW.
for all my wife cares ... it's just another hunk of plastic taking up space in her wallet.
she will have the option to use it if she needs to.
as far as her reluctance to apply ... i will reiterate ... bribery works.
MrPeter
Member
Am I the only one that sees that bribery as kind of funny? I've never been married but...?
What the cops are doing is messed up. I would issue a formal complaint if I didn't have to remain buddybuddy with the sheriff. I don't take kindly to bieng called a criminal.
What the cops are doing is messed up. I would issue a formal complaint if I didn't have to remain buddybuddy with the sheriff. I don't take kindly to bieng called a criminal.
tydephan
Member
You're absolutely right. My thought process was breaking down because I failed to distinguish between "encouraging her to carry" and "encouraging her to get her license." That was definitely my bad!
LOL. Yeah it is funny. But being married myself, you'll think of all sorts of ways to make both sides of an issue happy!
Not my decision.pax said:
She says she wants to learn to use an automatic before taking the class. MeThinks she's stalling.Actually, it was our friend and CCW instructor who told her it was better to use an auto. I think she took that to heart, and even he is now telling her she should take the class and qualify with the revolver. In my state, they don't care what you qualify with. Once you've qualified, you can carry any pistol.
My wife was the same way, but she's changed over the years. I think it helps that two of her siblings are LEOs who support CCW (in Los Angeles, no less) - and they also are now encouraging her to take the class. You gotta loved armed sisters-in-law.30 cal slob said:
SWModel19 ~
I understand.
You might try suggesting to her that the purpose of the class is to teach her stuff. She doesn't have to know a lot going in.
Another tack: it's probably true by now that she can't learn to rack the slide from that article, for whatever reason (I tried -- but fact is, written words simply don't convey as much as in-person communication with some hands-on instruction), so it's probably time to move to the next step, which is a class taught by someone who knows the techniques & basic instructional skills.
Final choice: step back and find someone else (preferably another woman) who knows how to rack a slide, who hasn't already had a go at showing her how to do it. It's possible that just getting a fresh set of hands & ideas into the mix will fix the problem for her.
Frustrating!
pax
I understand.
You might try suggesting to her that the purpose of the class is to teach her stuff. She doesn't have to know a lot going in.
Another tack: it's probably true by now that she can't learn to rack the slide from that article, for whatever reason (I tried -- but fact is, written words simply don't convey as much as in-person communication with some hands-on instruction), so it's probably time to move to the next step, which is a class taught by someone who knows the techniques & basic instructional skills.
Final choice: step back and find someone else (preferably another woman) who knows how to rack a slide, who hasn't already had a go at showing her how to do it. It's possible that just getting a fresh set of hands & ideas into the mix will fix the problem for her.
Frustrating!
pax
Aw Dang! That's an excellent idea, and we were in CA last week. It would have been a perfect time to ask her sister to teach her. I'll definately keep this one in mind and take the opportunity next time we visit my in-laws. Thanks for the advice.
Jeff22
Member
applying for a CCW permit
"Unfortunately, police are generally recruited from the local population, and share the cultural values and biases of the "average" citizen in the local population.
In places like the east and west coasts, big cities, and the northeast, the "average" cop is a lot like the "average" citizen. He has no interest in guns or shooting, and wonders why the hell anyone else does."
Truer words were never spoken!!
In general, cops aren't involved in any dark government conspiracy to confiscate your guns or violate your rights. They're just uninterested and uninformed.
And in many parts of the country (like where I am) most cops don't carry off duty on a regular basis (or at all) and they don't understand why anybody else might want to. It's not being arrogant and eliteist (most of the time), it's being ignorant.
I'm not excusing that, just explaining it. People always want to jump to conclusions and come up with wierd and convoluted conspiracy theories to explain the simple things. I don't know why that is . . .
"Never ascribe to malice, that which can be explained by incompetence."
--Napoleon Bonaparte
"Unfortunately, police are generally recruited from the local population, and share the cultural values and biases of the "average" citizen in the local population.
In places like the east and west coasts, big cities, and the northeast, the "average" cop is a lot like the "average" citizen. He has no interest in guns or shooting, and wonders why the hell anyone else does."
Truer words were never spoken!!
In general, cops aren't involved in any dark government conspiracy to confiscate your guns or violate your rights. They're just uninterested and uninformed.
And in many parts of the country (like where I am) most cops don't carry off duty on a regular basis (or at all) and they don't understand why anybody else might want to. It's not being arrogant and eliteist (most of the time), it's being ignorant.
I'm not excusing that, just explaining it. People always want to jump to conclusions and come up with wierd and convoluted conspiracy theories to explain the simple things. I don't know why that is . . .
"Never ascribe to malice, that which can be explained by incompetence."
--Napoleon Bonaparte
30 cal slob
Member
one of the mods here (sorry, i forgot which) made a very astute comment not too long ago ...
when in it comes to teaching scenarios, the husband-wife dynamic definitely gets in the way.
if you want your significant other to learn, she/he is best taught by somebody other than yourself.
a woman will definitely pay attention to what other knowledgeable women say ... which is why i'm seeing an explosion in women's-only NRA basic pistol courses!
when in it comes to teaching scenarios, the husband-wife dynamic definitely gets in the way.
if you want your significant other to learn, she/he is best taught by somebody other than yourself.
a woman will definitely pay attention to what other knowledgeable women say ... which is why i'm seeing an explosion in women's-only NRA basic pistol courses!
Nail Shooter
Member
This thread is a perfect example of how important "Shall Issue" legislation is in regard to CCW issue, and why it was created in the first place. Regards,
NS
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