Anyway, she then came out to shoot. To my horror, her first "technique" consisted of taking a one-hand grip and TURNING AWAY from the target I had set up, shutting her eyes TIGHT and pulling the trigger!
YEAH...I worked on that. At least when I was through she was LOOKING at the general direction she was shooting.
She also complained about the noise, even though I gave her earplugs. Was glad to learn she only shot the new gun once when she told me that she didn't have any of her OWN to use! She asked if they made any "quieter guns."
Sounds like she has some very real intimidation/fear issues to overcome. Was she shooting the airweight? I hope not, snubbies can be a handful, especially the really lightweight ones in the hands of someone who is intimidated. Many experienced shooter here on THR don't like the kick of the little .38 airweight snub as they find it painful and hard to control.
There a few options I see, and she would need to be involved in the process and pick the best option for her. See if you can go to a range and rent a few of the following:
1) A full size service style .38/.357 revolver, 4" barrel. The extra weight and barrel length do a lot towards reducing felt recoil, though they aren't a lot quieter than a snub. Load it up with some low recoil, target type wadcutters/semi wc ammo.
2) Small youth sized shotgun, .410 Ga. I've never fired a .410, maybe others can comment. One advantage of a shotgun, particularly a low power .410, is that it does not take as much practice to become proficient in their use. Aim is still important, but not as critical as with small handguns. Not sure about noise though. Start out with birdshot, then work your way up to some of the lighter buck shot loads.
3) A .22LR revolver. This may be the best bet. Is the .22 the best SD choice? No, but it beats throwing a remote control. Plus, the .22 is pretty quiet and recoil is very mild. If she doesn't mind shooting a .22 and can make more accurate shots, than that is what is most important. A hit with a .22 beats a miss with a .38 (or 9mm, .45 etc..) any day, everytime. Plus if she gets used to the .22, maybe one day she could try out #1 above.
Again, of the 3 options I just described, I think #3 could be the best option. But let her try something at a range. Let her decide, just be there to give guidance and answer her questions. Most importantly, show her how the gun she is about to shoot works. I learned this the hard way with my mom, she was intimated because she did not understand the mechanics of the gun (didn't help that it was a Single Action .22). Let her handle it, UNLOADED of course, to get a feel for it and get over the initial fear. This is very important.
Good luck, I hope she can find a solution that works for her.