Need Help convincing an anti... asap

[Lantern]

I think you should let this one go. If your friend's dad won't budge and your friend won't go against his wishes at 21 years of age then for the moment that is just how it is.


The only way this works with the dad never changing his stance is if your friend COMES TO YOU and says he wants to go and doesn't care what dad thinks. Any prodding or helping him come to that point WILL come back to you when it hits the fan. Trust me on this one.


Just as you do what you want and feel comfortable doing you should also let your friend be completely free to do so without any nudging whatsoever. The world is full of fun things to do without HAVING to do your favorite with a bud that isn't completely comfortable with the whole situation.

 

[Sniper66]

If you like baseball and your friend doesn't, you might invite him once or twice, but if he says no thanks, you do something else. DROP IT! I work in an organization filled with liberal social workers, many of whom are antigun. I am a strong personality and they know better than to try to push an antigun philosophy on me, just as I don't try to convince them to like guns. What has happened though, over the years, is that a number of them have quietly asked my advice about guns for home protection and issues related to concealed carry. I will not shy away from a gun argument, but I don't go looking for one either.

 

[ArfinGreebly]

Are there some kids you can take shooting?

So, you have two or three kids that you're taking to the range, and you say to your friend (we'll call him George), "hey, George, I'm going out to the range this weekend to teach some kids gun safety and how to shoot, wanna come with us?"

Or possibly, "hey, George, I'm taking a couple of girls from [the office/our church] out to the range for some lessons in gun safety and shooting; interested?"

Use a light touch. Don't push. Don't pout or sulk if he turns you down.

"Okay, George. Maybe next time! We're gonna have a ball!"

The approval-from-dad thing? Well, that's something he gets to sort out.

You're gonna go do completely normal fun stuff with kids/girls/friends, and you're gonna enjoy yourself.

 

[splattergun]

It's pointless to try to overcome emotional rhetoric with logic. The father's reliance on emotional tripe points to an immature lack of logic. Arguing with such a person is futile.
Your friend is an adult, fully within the age of majority in all 50 states. If he want to shoot, help him learn the right, safe way. Dealing with his own father is a rite of passage that seems to be due.

 

[mmitch]

Perhaps "Dad" is actually a controlling martinet, in which case, his need to be psychotic is long practiced and stronger than any logic you can bring to the table.
Moving-on with your plans is sound advice.

Mike

 

[Jnitti1014]

One of the rites of passage into manhood is doing the things that you want to do even if they are in direct opposition to your parent's wishes.

Examples:

Marry the girl YOU want to marry.

Embark on the career of YOUR choice.

And, if you want to participate in the shooting sports, then YOU do that.

Winthepennant, excellent post

 

[Kendahl]

Since you don't expect to see your friend for considerable time, your top priority should be to make this visit as enjoyable as possible. Away from his father, offer to introduce him to shooting but be clear that, if he would rather not, you will be happy doing something he will be comfortable with.

Trying to change your friend's father's mind about anything sounds futile. Your own parents' attitude to your shooting is appropriate. They respect your decision even though it isn't one they would choose for themselves. Your friend's father isn't willing to respect his son as an independent adult.

If your friend wants to have a life of his own, rather than be his father's clone, he has to learn to make his own decisions and stick to them no matter how strongly his father pressures him to revert to minor child status. You can support him is this, but you can't do it for him.