I know this can go downhill fast so hoping that this can remain mild so that I can advise a newish shooter that asked me some questions.
He came to me asking about getting a 1911 as his SD gun. He's a smallish guy with smaller hands. He served in the military in a non combat role so the extent of his shooting skills, IDK. I advised him that he may consider a 9mm since the grip diameter is a bit smaller and those models with backstrap or side panels options they can be adjusted for hand size. He prefers a .45 because it has that big barrel.
Thoughts to enlighten him?
You need more info from him, such as, have you fired a full-size 1911 in .45 or any other caliber? As a SD gun, does he/do you mean for EDC, or something to put in the nightstand drawer or his glove box?
I wouldn't try to steer him away from a 1911-style pistol, but fine-tuning his wants to his needs and what fits him best is important for him to keep liking it and becoming proficient with it. I don't really under stand what he means by liking the .45 "because it has that big barrel"; does he mean the intimidation factor of a bore big enough to stick a finger in, or??? Heck a 10mm bull barrel in a 1911 is bigger than the .45 barrel, even though the bore is not. And if you could steer him towards a 9mm, Springfield makes one that DOES have a smaller grip than the standard 1911, but you have to hold one of them and a full size to tell it, they look almost identical. The EMP and EMP4 9mm's have a slightly narrower grip, the frames were designed to better suit the .40 and 9.mm cartridges. Now, I haven't shot the EMP, which is a 3 inch barrel, but I own the EMP4, which is 4 inches and is similar to, but not the same, as a Commander-sized pistol, and I really like the feel of the slightly smaller grip. My hands aren't tiny, but they aren't really big, either. A double stack magazine is too big for my comfort, the full-size 1911 grip fits, but the slightly smaller EMP grip is perfect for my hand. If it helps, I wear a size 8 surgical glove, or medium work gloves. If he wants an EDC and is willing to go 9mm, he should really look at this pistol. The major differences between the two are no barrel bushing and full-length control rod, an ambidextrous thumb safety, slightly bigger beavertail and the bumped grip safety, and a rubber 'slap pad' on the magazine bottom. Like the full-size, it has the Series 70 absence of a firing pin safety. It holds 10+1 in a single-stack magazine. There is also a "bobbed" grip version that cuts the back corner off the grip to make it even better at concealment.
Picture with the EMP4 and a standard 1911:
