The continual question

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My daughter is now 16, when she first wanted to go shoot pistols with me she was 12, she had no problem racking the slide on a 1911 commander or a 6904 S&W, She prefered shooting the commander because the recoil was a shove more than a slap from the lighter s&w.

As far as purse carry, My wife has used that for years, her purse does not leave her shoulder when standing and at work she has a locking file cabinet that holds her purse when ever she can not carry it with her. To discourage anyone from looking around in her purse with out her permission, her gun slot also has a couple of "feminine products" placed between the opening and her gun. She can still draw in an instant but even an inquisitive security guard stopped when he opened the gun slot and the Kotex label on the wrapper.

My daughter now has a carry purse, even tho she is too young, but she does carry her mace in there.
 
Add my vote for a used J frame. Have a competent gunsmith slick the action, maybe replace or clip the return spring a bit, (but leave the main alone!), and you'll have winner.

It's been a great solution for about 5 or 6 of my lady friends over the last 30 years. :)
 
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