Well this ended well...

[sm]

...both times tonight.

Mom just turned 76, lives alone, neighborhood is not what it used to be. One car garage and the only one in her cul-de-sac that does. One car driveway naturally. Motion lights front and back. She has a metal door, beefed up locks and jamb. Patio door has been secured, holes drilled top and bottom so cannot be lifted off tracks. Windows have screens, again holes drilled and big nails inserted so cannot raise windows. Broomsticks for ambience (she is 76, gimme a break, gives a visual "cannot be raised" - makes her happy). Fence along back and one side.

I keep tabs on mom, done fired the rest of the folks supposed to be family.

I am at mom's and hear a car, I listen as I do, since, I do stuff like this. Drug deals take place often next door , around corner, cul-de-sac...
I'm listening to this rattle-trap hitting on about half its cylinders..."squeak" ...into mom's driveway it pulls in. Mom's car is in garage, my car is parked on wrong side of road in front of neighbors. I like parking it there allows across street folks to back out and not worry about backing into me.

Now mom is in kitchen and there is a portable in her bedroom, portable and landline in front of house. She has a cell phone.

Door Bell Rings...
Storm door is yanked, door knob is twisted...

"Mom - go to bedroom, take cell phone and be quiet!"
"oh...oh...oh my..."
Blew the lessons shared and what training stuff I 'thought' I had done with mom....

I grab portable and dial a buddy on his landline. Tell him what is up , stay on phone and he confirms he has direct line to city, county, and state LEO on his wife's cell. Oh...he just has to tell me about a Caspian Frame and Slide he got in to build a gun. Sounds like a great BS topic to be online with during all this...

BIG Peep hole.

This person has a beard now, is one shall we say - physically abused someone I have since fired.

Oh just great.

Of course I am CCW-ing, 2 spare mags. I also have a cane behind the door, and a wooden wedge for a door stop.

Ding Dong.

I cannot open door any further than door stop will let me. BTDT and got hurt. I learn from mistakes, I try not to repeat stuff that hurts.

Someone is home! Okay someone was REAL FRIGGING Surprised to see someone home - especially ME. Did I mention this person, while crazy as road tick, bigger, is really and truly frightened of me? Fear is a good thing...when it is the other guy.

Err...hem-haw...stutter...Is you mom in? I was just passing thru, and she was always so nice and wanted to say hello.

He only lives ~ 150 miles from here...

...sniff...sniff...you smell it, I did, real strong too.

"Well she went to the back to stretch out, may have ended up taking a nap, I wore her out taking her shopping..."

I can wing it with the best of them. I shut door, lock dead bolt.

"You want me to send a buddy by that lives closer and say he is coming over to have a prayer meeting or something..." Remind me to choke this buddy will ya.

"Mom, I told him you were napping most likely. Me, I am fixing something...[I take front cover off vacuum that is handy...that'll work]
[Mom gives me the dumbest look...]
Just act you are goofey from napping. I'll be outside smoking, we stay separated at all times, never bunch up...".
I get a more dumb stare.

I open door, I walk out holding door. He comes in and sits down on the couch. Yes the one you are NOT supposed to sit "there".

So I can see into front room from storm door, I can see mom, but his back is to me. He cannot leave, becasue he had to come out front, patio door is secure, he cannot run thru garage, cause the door is down.

He chats, 10 minutes or so and leaves. Oh I have his tags and all written down, passed onto buddy on phone.

Mom is as scared as she can be. "What if I had been alone?" I get to this later.

So hang around do what I come to do...I hear a car again...same one. Only this time, he does not pull all the way up the street to driveway, lights off.

I was waiting.

I know where to stand just outside of Motion lights. I was smoking and watching. My gut said to do so.

Motion lights come on from his walking up, I am in shadows.

"Forget something".

Well he was jittery before, not sure what he is on...but he jumped big time.

"My smokes...I ..."

"Nope, they were in your front pocket when you left. In fact you fired one up as you left."

Now I am planning on spending the night, just because I do stuff unpredictable and all and this" seems like a good time to do so."

Where is you car?

FWIW I dont' drive a car, I drive the same truck he "should' remember. Granted my truck has a blackout package and is really hard to see at night...

"Oh I drive that Maxima there, neat ride huh?. I just park it behind the neighrbors car across the street with permission, to stay out of the way.."

Hey the Maxima is visiting from South Carolina, I'm in AR, what do I care.

He leaves, jumpy, not real sure what just happened. For sure he still hates and fears me.

It is good to be the one that fires sheeple family , and is feared by crazy road tick abusers...

 

[JohnKSa]

WARNING! This post is written with the express intent to inform and entertain. Due to the differences in human nature, behavior and culture, it is possible that information contained within this post may annoy the reader although that is certainly not the intent of the author. Reading past this point constitutes an agreement by the reader to waive his legal right not to be annoyed by anonymous communication on the internet.

If you do not wish to waive this right, please stop reading at this point and use the ignore feature on this forum to avoid future posts by this author. Thank you.

You were far nicer than I would have been.

Don't think I would have let him stay so long the first time, and I think I would have let him stay a lot longer the second time.

BTW, I'm not so sure you can say with certainty that it's ended...

 

[Preacherman]

I think you were far too nice to him...

Last time a lady I knew had an abusive visitor like that, a gentleman from my church was in a similar situation to yours. He had a "come to Jesus" chat with the visitor... something like "You are NOT welcome here; if I see you on this lady's property ever again - never mind at the door or in the house, just on the property will do - you'll be leaving by one of two means: an ambulance or the coroner's van. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME???"

The visitor got the message...

 

[sm]

"What if" - single old lady style.

Mom just had to ask...after she finally got settled and quit muttering...I was scared and not sure what I would have done had you not been here...

Sigh...

This ain't Rocket Science mom.

-Garage , having one and using it allows one a secure way to enter and exit vehicle. With vehicle inside - they do not know if someone is home.

-Don't answer the door. I mean just because you have a door, doorbell, doorknocker - does not mean you have to answer the durn thing.

-Direct line to LEO agencies, not just one on Portable, Cell phones.

-Have a call buddy system. Meaning she can call someone as I did and that person can call direct to LEO. The person I called and I have a codeword/ passphrase for trouble; everything okay, and such.

-Go to safe places in home as discussed and planned.

"I forgot where I am supposed to go". she said

-Be Quiet! Folks can hear voices inside. Don't be going "oh...oh" or "just a minute" or "who is it". Just talk to your call buddy in a quiet voice. Use the durn volume control - don't raise your voice to be heard.

"I wouldn't have heard him had the TV been on like I normally do"

My look "said" - conveyed my feelings about TVs. Turn the durn thing down , or mute during commercials and listen to surroundings. Around here the sirens get serene in a wierd way after a bit...I mean if you don't here one every 15 min - something is off and out of kilter...

-Peek out Curtains/ Blinds from dark room. Meaning do not tip off you are home by turning one on. And don't pull the shades or attract attention . "Peek means Peek".

"Okay he was in here and looked into kitchen, I did NOT offer a soda, coffee, or even water...did not want him any longer" <way to go mom smilie here>

"Just tell him you cleaned the coffee pot with vinegar and not rinsed out yet".
Eldest son dumbest look so far. I got jaw dropping this time.

"If you were on the phone with a call buddy, just tell whomever that you let in here, workman, whatever, / you are waiting to be picked up to go out to eat, someone is coming over...being Sat night, and you do attend church, going over a Sunday School lesson with someone would work".

"That is lying"

"Survive first, then that way you toss more money in the collection plate, ask forgiveness, or both. Hurt makes that more difficult - dead, I don't think it much matters.

"Steve" [ yeah I still get yelled at, this is serious stuff IMO]

"Well mom, here is the come to Jesus part. Understand I don't give a whit what some folks think. My life is shaped from my experiences, being a realist, and thinking outside of the box"

You Used to take personal responsiblity for yourself. You have become very complacent. You hide behind a pew, and being elderly somehow you are "owed" something, from your other sibs, .gov or something.

I have tried to share, I know all about your limitations, aches, pains and meds. I have shared some folks have taken responsiblity for themselves in wheelchairs, worse off than you, partial foot missing due to diabetes - you name it. Because I was involved in such training and assistance.

Now- your other kids, want to pack up your butt, take over your life, control it and put you somewhere else. I know more than I am supposed to.

Now, you are it, I fired everyone else. In the famous words of Rosey Greer to Richard Pryor "Whatcha gonna do?"

You have not made any attempts to do for yourself as you used to. You are still 'saying' you are going to do things since Rita and Katrina....

This is not over with , there is one more - read two men - crazy as road ticks, that know where you live, dope is involved with one if not both, you have PREY in radiating neon letters all over you and this place.

I busted my butt to make matters as safe as I can. A LOT has to be YOU mom and your mindset.

I'm staying the night. Mom has retired for the evening...it got real quiet around here after the come to Jesus meeting.

--

All sorts of "What ifs" in my two posts. Why I carry a CCW in a home, even the frigging bathroom. What if mom had not paid attention and let this guy in and I was in the bathroom?

Beefing up the house, call buddies, direct line to LEO ...not Dial-a-Prayer via 911. Garages and using them - everytime.

Around here they follow old folks, especially with handicapped tags home and rob in driveway or knock on doors pretending to be delivery or somesuch. Mom has a hang tag - I made a big deal on her NOT gettng a license plate.

In my state I have to retreat. I may be in fear of life - still got to retreat. Don't mean I cannot have zones of fire figured out with appliances and furniture.

You have parents, folks living alone, folks you check on or should?

What if...

 

[carebear]

Any idea on his intent in coming to see mom? Get a line on the fired one maybe?

That seems to be the most obvious I can think of, unless he had bad intentions for mom herself for some reason.

 

[sm]

Preacherman

I was assertive in my demeanor.

This guy and the other one - really are afraid of me. I am not "polite" and made it very very clear and explicit to each one on one at the appropriate time how I feel. Patton would be proud.

Do not abuse another, and do not do so to a child. Makes no difference to me if share or did share last name. Matter of Principle with me.

It is very evident I am not like my sibs. I am not like the guy whom sired me. These two have met these folks.

I am the black sheep - so sayth the family. I hate that 'sheep' part.

No, I am the only smart one of the bunch, they are sheeple. I am the Rebel , PITA, Rouge, Outlaw , Desperado...and whatever else I am called.

Afraid - heck no. I am smart and sober. I have a plan, a backup,plan and a backup.

I have made some adjustments since mom retired for the evening

Yeah well I guess her church gets more monies in the plate and whatever because her eldest son lied and suggested she do so...

I got a Preacher buddy that probably understands and will take care matters on my behalf if need.

I get to raid the fridge, best part of babysitting a house is raiding the fridge, not used to folks being home when I babysit most times. I at least know where all the good stuff is around here. No dogs, I like it when I have dogs to assist me.

Truth is - this idiot does not know how bad it really gets around mom's area at night ...liable to get shot if he comes back this way. Maybe I should have told him about the dope guys down the way with tatoos...ya think?

 

[JohnKSa]

WARNING! This post is written with the express intent to inform and entertain. Due to the differences in human nature, behavior and culture, it is possible that information contained within this post may annoy the reader although that is certainly not the intent of the author. Reading past this point constitutes an agreement by the reader to waive his legal right not to be annoyed by anonymous communication on the internet.

If you do not wish to waive this right, please stop reading at this point and use the ignore feature on this forum to avoid future posts by this author. Thank you.

Truth is - this idiot does not know how bad it really gets around mom's area at night ...liable to get shot if he comes back this way.

During his long stay the second time around, this would have come up during our talk.

"Say, road tick, this is a pretty rough neighborhood. You should be very careful comin' down here late at night. Crazy stuff goin' on all the time--anything could happen. I'm tellin' you this because I ALWAYS look out for my family--you KNOW?"

Then launch into the long rambling soliloquy about the dope guys with the tattoos...

 

[sm]

I was asseritive like I said.

I know why he was here, I knew and forewarned mom some time ago. That blew her mind, when he did. Not the first time one of my "suggestions" actually came to fruition.

It was mentioned he needed oil, vehicle, which I will not share description , needs oil. He mentioned being hungry, and he was not feed. Not given money...not given a whole helluva lot to be honest. It was snowing inside the house one could say.

I mentioned a certain place probably would have the best deal on oil, very possible it may be on sale, just down the way from some fast food spots and one I do believe one or some also running a special.I suggested the jalapeno poppers for appetizers.

He knows where these places are so he said.

I mean all he had to do is listen for shots fired, richochet sparks...darn I forget to mention them instructions. Oh well, I know some LEO stay near and in the shadows to keep tabs...and EMTs...over that-a-way.

Assertive don't mean I was not being helpful - somewhat.

 

[grimjaw]

sm, since you're in AR, could you stop by and give the same treatment to my mom?

Luckily, she's surrounded by four huge labradors, father, brother, sister, brother in law, and one fiercely loving three-year old nephew who would bring Hades down on anybody who hurt his grandma.

I used to stay over at my grandmother's house in AR at nights when she got up in years. There are a ton of older women whose husbands have passed on leaving them in a big house in an increasingly bad neighborhood.

Good on you, sm.

jmm

 

[Ryder]

Maybe I'm too protective. I'd have offered to take a message but no way would he be coming into the house given the details you laid out. Good thing you were there. I think you should see if your mom can recall what he said.

My dad is getting old. Has medical problems. Doesn't get out much anymore. I don't worry about his safety. He still has his guns. He's a super friendly person but don't give him cause to fight. I've seen him in action a few times. It's like an atom bomb going off

 

[sm]

Options:

In the brief moment we had I asked mom / suggested what she wanted to do.
I blocked her immediate reaction as she was going "oh" and slinging hands toward the door to answer it.

1) Don't answer the door.
He either goes away, sticks around for a bit,keeps coming back tries to break-in, or attempts to call.

2)Answer the door.
He asks what he I know he came for. He causes a scene. Gets Violent. He gets real uncomfortable with me being here and leaves.

Mom's decison...pretty much. I was going to step in and be WatchDog if need. Eldest son never played into my reasons. Sometimes there is difference in meddling, and just stepping up and being the responsible person in a situation. I mean I have stepped aside when someone better suited than I - better to handle a situation.

She chose to answer the door. Under MY rules if you will. She agreed with this. Her house. She admitted she really did not prepare for this, and agreed to let me take the lead role. " I want your help" .

May come back to bite me in the rear, wouldn't be the first time. Still at that time, so far, this is what she was comfortable with.


My reasons :

I wanted Mom to see for herself that "it can happen to me". This "yeah I need to do that" (complancent attitude),there is a real world out there.

Him- I wanted to convey - One never knows the where or when of next encounter -CRSam
Is a two way street. Good Guys use this as well. I wanted to convey awareness, alertness, and he ( or anyone he may choose to share anything about mom to fall onto illegal ears with) - he does not know.

Riskey- perhaps yes.

Lessons learned by mom and him - hopefully yes.

We will see.

For sure, I benefitted already. This keeps me sharp. Allows me to share experience, strength, and hope with others. I will learn from folks posting.

 

[NMshooter]

The second visit, dark at night, in a neighborhood known for drug dealing, and a trusty cane at hand...

I don't know, maybe I am just getting short tempered as I get older.

 

[Kodiaz]

Hey SM I know the drill too. I live in an apartment attached to my grandmother's house after my granfather died one of the tenants decided they didn't need to pay rent. So I moved in. My gramma watches the place during the time and I watch at nite.

 

[Bob F.]

2nd visit: I might have decocked 1911 when I saw his car. Thumbed it back when he got close enough to hear WELL. Then spoke. That's not a threat. I could always deny it ever happened it it was ever necessary. A 1911 is always condition 1.

Thanks you, sir.
Bob

 

[springmom]

as a mom....

I was asseritive like I said.

I know why he was here, I knew and forewarned mom some time ago. That blew her mind, when he did. Not the first time one of my "suggestions" actually came to fruition.

I mean all he had to do is listen for shots fired, richochet sparks...darn I forget to mention them instructions. Oh well, I know some LEO stay near and in the shadows to keep tabs...and EMTs...over that-a-way.

Assertive don't mean I was not being helpful - somewhat.

.....although I'm not quite in my dotage yet (17 year old son's opinion to the contrary!) let me say that I would be proud for any of my sons to look after me as you are doing for your mom. I'll adopt you any time

The 17 year old and I have fairly frequent conversations regarding WHO does the defending if we're home and a BG busts in. I think, but am not sure, that I have drummed it into his thick 17 year old head that I'm the one with the gun and it can shoot farther and faster than his katana can whack. Just had this talk tonight, as a matter of fact. He arms himself with a nice long dagger his oldest brother bought him, for when he's here by himself if we're out in an evening, and he was wearing it tonight. I told him to go put it away, and we had the usual talk. He finally laughed and said he'd let me deal with it 'cause he didn't want to dull the blade anyway....

Sorry. Maybe I am slipping into dotage, 'cause that sort of was OT, but the point is, I have really gotten "into" firearms and have always been "into" self defense even before I owned a firearm. But your mom is a different kind of lady and you are not likely to change her much. Best you can do is make that place the devil to get into, make alarms go off .... loudly.... outdoors when somebody bad walks up (air horns linked to the motion detectors? or some such? sure would scare the neighborhood cats out of your mom's flower gardens....) and try to talk her into a large deep-voiced dog.

But seriously, +5. You're being a good son.

Springmom

 

[sm]

springmom,
I appreciate the kind words. Thank You.

I'll adopt you any time

Finally! Someone actually read one of my flyers saying I put myself up for adoption. Not to be picky ...you do fried apples pies done in a cast iron skillet?

PM sent. No not that - something else...

This incident is not over. I gotta a feeling, my gut talks to me. Just making plans with mom ...

Hell hath no fury as a woman scorned.


Southern Folks, especially Gentleman, don't think too kindly of folks picking on weaker folks either. Make it a eldest son and elderly mom ...

Steve

 

[Tokugawa]

SM- What 'zaxtly is a fried apple pie? Have I been missing something?!

 

[ball3006]

A fried pie.....

is pie fruit filling, placed in a pie crust pocket, crimped shut, then deep fried, then sprinkled with powdered sugar...........no finer eatin'.......chris3

 

[TMM]

why the hell did you let him in?

~TMM