Well I am basing this on lessons and testing , and actual reports for indoor use (home and business), and settings, like being armed robbed and having to shoot from inside a vehicle and not really having time to <hand signals> "Excuse me Criminal, I need a time-out to get my Eyes and Ears".
.38spl standard is a low pressure round and most quiet.
.44 spl and 45ACp work well too.
9mm standard pressure is a bit louder and more crack.
.40, Sharp, ear piercing crack, then again I grew up before .40 cal and guns come to be, so me and mine don't like the .40, and none of the folks we have worked with like it either.
.357, and .22 magnum are LOUD!
.44 mag full house loads are loud, still that was my car gun...
Now in real life, a .357 going off in your face is a helluva louder than a 9mm, and 38spls incoming to a car are "muffled" by the rear passenger glass behind one driving exploding.
Incidentally I never heard his follow up shots , I was too busy with tires smoking and squealing, and bending sheet metal to leave real fast...
WE recommend low pressure rounds...I bought for instance 14 Model 10s for a business, and some were in the business and the rest for employee CCW and home use.
158 LSWC standard pressure loads.
I did not want HP
Reality is, you may not have time for eyes and ears...do you CCW Ears?
I at least smoke, so I could if time allowed shove cigarette butts in my ears...
My truck has foam plugs...
Trust me, and others that have BTDT, when you are being shot at, rammed, going down the road- getting ears on...is not a real high priority.
.38spl or 9mm, whichever you shoot best, is my suggestion with standard loadings.