Well, there's certainly no denying there's a certain allure to being able to shoot the more powerful .357 Remington Magnum cartridge in the same revolver that chambers the .38 S&W Special.
That's why I've owned more full-size, medium-framed .357 Magnum revolvers than similar guns chambered in .38 Special.
On the other hand, when it comes to 5-shot small-framed revolvers I much prefer shooting Magnum loads through my Ruger SP-101DAO.
Now, I never really thought of myself as 'recoil sensitive'. I mean, back when I was a handloader I used to think that an enjoyable afternoon was one where I fired several hundred stout .44 Magnum loads in my Ruger SA revolvers. I'd often finish the day by shooting the 'light recoiling' .357 Magnum Blackhawk, or a Security-Six with full-power factory ammunition or stout handloads. Like I said, I liked heavy recoiling guns.
However, I think that the optimal balance of a very small, lightweight, accurate & controllable defensive revolver ...
for me ... is found in a S&W Airweight rated for the use of .38 Spl +P.
I've handled and fired my fair share of Airlite J-frame Magnums using full-power Magnum loads. I've demonstrated on a number of occasions that I can consistently make fast & accurate doubles & triples on targets with that combination out to 10 yards.
I've also demonstrated to myself that I don't enjoy doing so. I'm not saying it's as bad as trying to stop a runaway train with a baseball bat
... but it's not something I feel like doing very often.
With that said, I ordered a M&P 340 when they were first being released. I didn't buy it just to be able to shoot Magnum loads. I wanted the stronger Scandium aluminum alloy frame, the stainless cylinder and the XS tritium dot front sight. I thought of it as a 'stronger' 642 with a better front sight. I would've bought it if it had only been chambered in .38 Special. As it is, I use some Magnum loads in the mix for training, practice and qualification ... but I carry it loaded with .38 Spl +P.
Just like I do my pair of 642-1's.
Handguns are often considered to be a compromise, overall, when it comes to defensive weapons.
For me, the S&W J-frame chambered in .38 Spl (and especially the newer ones rated for +P) is where I find my example of the quintessential acceptable compromise for a handy lightweight, diminutive, reliable and accurate off-duty (and now retirement) CCW weapon. Especially for those times when carrying one of my larger weapons isn't something I feel like doing.
I have a 37 Airweight in which I only load standard pressure .38 Spl, too.
Some folks find that they prefer to only use standard pressure .38 Spl loads in their 5-shot short-barreled revolvers for reason of felt recoil, accuracy and controllability. That's fine. I can understand that reasoning. They need to do what works best for them and their needs.
I can also understand why not a lot of folks feel like shooting Magnum loads through a 11-13+ ounce itty bitty revolver, too.
Like I said, if I want to shoot Magnum loads through a 5-shot revolver, I'll break my SP-101DAO out of the safe.
A steel J-frame chambered in .357 Magnum is tempting, and I may add one to my J-frame collection someday just because I like J-frames. Dunno. Probably still carry one of my Airweights more often, though. The steel J-frame can sit in the safe next to the Ruger SP-101.
Different strokes, though.
The .38 Spl and .38 Spl +P J-frame Airweight is sufficient for my anticipated needs.
Just my thoughts.