World's Funniest Fake Soldiers...

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But as to people talking about war experiences, my psych doctor told me to talk about it and it actually has helped my PTSD out tremendously. I wouldnt say I brag about it but I do talk about it.

I too am one of the guys who feels really uncomfortable when people start thanking me and what not. I didnt do anything special.
 
i believe there is a website out there ran by a SEAL, where he outs people claiming to be SEALs
 
I had a cousin that fought in the Pacific during WWII. When he got home he said,"It was awful and you could smell those stinking islands from 20 miles out to sea." That was it. He never said another word about the war for the rest of his life. I suspect he saw some really nasty stuff and wanted to forget what he could.
 
"MW"

There was a guy on the Daily Paul forum called "MW" who was bad-mouthing me. He claimed to have 24 years of experience as a sniper instructor. I outed him in my FAQs - haven't heard from him since.

Incidentally, in case you are wondering, I was never in the military and have never said I that I was. I'm a mathematician - I have a humorous biography on my site, which discusses some of the things I've invented.
 
I used to work with a guy in the early 90s that claimed up and down he was a SEAL in Vietnam. My girlfriend at the time went to church with his wife, and it turns out he was in elementary school during Vietnam :).

Just my .02,
LeonCarr
 
I am going to admit that I was very childish, un-highroadish, and did something needlessly dangerous that could have endangered people. But I did basically out someone. (And no, at NO POINT did I ever pull a gun, even though the story will seem to go in that direction for a few moments.)

I was in a small knife shop specializing MOSTLY in collectibles (fantasy swords, and stuff like that), but it did also have a great working knife selection in the back, and the shopkeeper was knowledgeable so I'd go there to chat often.

One time, this guy came in. Not really young. Late 30's kind of look. Bald, with a greying goatee. He was looking over automatic knives and assisted folders. I can't remember how the conversation went this way, but eventually he told me that his knife was faster than my gun.

He said while holding up an open assisted folder knife, 'I know I can get to my knife before you can get to your gun. And then, you know what? Then I got your gun. And you know how I know this? Former Special Forces, IN Combat!'

Well, I slapped the knife out of his hand when he said that. I thought it was a very fitting thing to do at that time, but in retrospect, that knife sailed through the air a good distance, and could've hurt someone if anyone happened to be in its path.

Oh well, just another mistake to live and learn from.
 
If I remember correctly didn't a former Naval CNO ( the Navy's chief of staff?) commit suicide because he was about to be outed for wearing a bogus Vietnam Service Ribbon?

ETA a portion of the newspaper story
The nation's top Navy officer, distraught after some of his military awards were called into question, died Thursday, May 16, 1996, from an apparently self-inflicted gunshot wound.
Adm. Jeremy Boorda was to have met about the time of the shooting with the Washington bureau chief of Newsweek magazine, which was working on a story concerning his medals. Administration officials, speaking on condition of anonymity, said there was no evidence the shooting was accidental and no suspicion of foul play. Two notes were found at Boorda's residence; they were sealed by investigating police.
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Haha, this is a great thread.

I never got to serve. I tried, but they don't like to let people with asthma in to any service. (Nevermind that I used to run the 2 mile and 1 mile event in track when I was in high school, regardless of my asthma.) However, when I was a boy, EVERY male I knew and respected in my town had served, or was still serving. One of my best friends had a family of military men - dad and 3 older brothers - that always took us to West Point for football games (I was more interested in the military stuff, but the games were ok) and all sorts of cool military functions. Needless to say, I loved guns and military machinery, and knew quite a bit about the different branches of service.

So anyway, I've heard all the BS stories from people. I can spot these jokers a mile away.

My wife worked with a lady whose husband "got accepted into the SEAL program" and had to leave her for 2 months for training. Never mind the fact that he was 35 and had never been enlisted before. I told my wife to let her friend know that not only can't you join the active military at that age without prior service, but that the Navy SEAL teams don't pick out people who haven't even completed basic yet. Especially not overweight morons. Turns out, he didn't get accepted, but was shacking up with another woman. Big shocker.

Guy at my current job claimed to have been stationed at a USAF base in Korea. "Oh yeah?" I asked, honestly interested. "Which one, Osan or Kunsan?" No, he says, the OTHER one. "Yeah, dude, I hate to poke holes in your story, but those are your only two choices." Also, we work for a major military contractor and have USAF people all over our campus. Hello? Pick a dumber place to make up military service, would ya?:banghead:
 
i had a neighbor that claimed to be marine recon, a cowboy, have a law enforcemont background & for $200 would tell you how to get a job.
the first day he moved in he was glassing his 2 acre treeless back yard looking for terrorist & anything that was out of the ordinary " just like he did when he was in marine recon".

a couple days later he buys a horse. so i tell him he needs to check the fence along the back of the property because when we had a couple of cows on it the got out. the back of the property borders a bayou & according to him horses aren't as sure footed as cows & they will not go down an incline so it doesn't even need a fence on the back.
about two weeks later he bought a hot rod camaro. a few days later a cop stops by his house for a few minutes. after the cop left i asked him what it was about. he said they had a car chase earlier in the day & their cop cars weren't fast enough to catch the guy so they called him to chase the guy down in his camaro because he has a law enforcement background.

then one day right after that he comes over to the fence & asks me if i have a job because for $200 he'll tell me where i can get one.
 
I used to work with a guy that would tell us all sorts of things. Like how he used to be a Detroit Police Officer, but had to retire after getting shot in the gut 6 times with a .357 magnum and immediately falling out of a 6th story window afterwards. Of course, he mentioned that he liked to carry his .50 cal desert eagle, or his .44 mag (he switched it up, apparently). Apparently before I started working there he would tell people about his time servicing in Vietnam, which they found to be hilarious because he was born in 1964 (do they let 10 year olds serve? I forget...) however I didn't find it as funny, because my Great Uncle Ed actually DID serve in the military, he was in the Marine's, Force Recon. He, however didn't get to come home and make up stories. I think the longer you live, the more you realize that some people just aren't worth your time.
 
I guess the entire thread would be OT without that line, but dude, a lot of military personnel have no real firearms knowledge outside of what they're taught in Basic. Shooting guns for a living does not always translate into shooting guns as a hobby, and .mil guys are just as prone as anyone else to believe the wild tales about .45 blowing your arm or leg clean off on a toe shot, or whatever.
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Yep, but if you claim to be a SEAL, or something like that, by God you had better be able to tell me what caliber a 92FS is, or how to operate the bolt release on a M4. If your a truck mechanic or work on jets like I did then yeah I could see that.

There is a guy that work with that one day while walking into work asked me about the tattoo of the UPC on my arm. I had it put on me my last year and the numbers are my enlistment date and age when I joined the Air Force. So he said "yeah this is mine" and showed me the one on his forearm. I asked what it meant, and he quoted a bible verse. So I asked why that and he told me that while he was in the Air Force they were going to discharge him, and that he was over at the "motor pool" helping them out. He stated that he was on the flight line at Lackland AFB and he was changing oil on a truck when a dude in a Humvee pulled up and ran over him. So while I was at Lackland, never saw a flight line but there is Kelly AFB right down the street. I was on a flight line and have never saw the "motor pool" out there. He said that it broke his back and both of hips, and the Air Force said tough, you are on your own.

Other than him being ran over, he has told other people at my work that he was a sniper in the Marines, that he was in operations so secret that he would have to kill us if he told us. I make fun of this guy. When I got out, I hitch hiked into a small north Oregon town where this guy that looked a lot like Brian Dennehey tried to get me out of town. So I came back and he arrested me. Long story short I found my self on a boat with a cook that knew some karate, ad beat the guy down that hijacked the boat and was gonna launch some missiles. I got pics of the whole thing.
 
back around the 2004 election, some yahoo was on yahoo talking smack about the war, why we need kerry :barf:, and why we should pull out of iraq. He was also claiming that he was a General, 0-7, and that through his years of experience in running an army and fighting a war, that this is just not the war to be engaged in. He talked at length of his decades of experience, his work working with other militaries and cooperating militarily with other countries.

And the hippies on the forum were taking it, hook line and sinker. They said more of the military should speak up, and if this came from a general then it must be true.

However, As it is illegal under UCMJ for commissioned officers to be vocally airing such political speech on a public forum, I clicked on his profile.

In his profile was him in his class A uniform. bedazzled in ribbons and medals..... to include E7 chevrons!!! :scrutiny:
He was a Sergeant First Class in some National Guard artillery outfit in California.

He never ran an army, he ran a platoon.
So yeah, i called him out on it.
Priceless.

He tried to tell me he was doing it for the good of the country, :banghead: blah blah blah.
Whatever.

/real soldier
/101st Airborne
//Iraq
 
Well, I do remember one time when I was in the 6th grade. I was playing paintball with one of my friends (well; wouldn't go as far as saying 'friend'). He said his dad may join us later. So I responded, 'Do you think I could take him?'

The kid looked at me like I was stupid and said, 'Yeah right. He's an ex-navy seal.'

Well aparently, this guy also owned a gunshop, liquor store, was in the army, navy seals, photographer for the falcons football team, played in the minor and major league (The mets), and managed to have a job at home depot, lowes, and was a private pilot. Pretty amazing this guy accomplished all of this in his ~40 years of life!

And he told a story of 'his' gunshop. He said he blew a hole the size of his fist in the side of his wall. He also owned full auto stens and uzis there too :rolleyes:

Did I mention he also started varsity basketball for Baylor highschool at age 6?
 
A close friend of mine served and has scars to prove it. A few months ago we were at the range and he was owning me at 100 yards with my own rifle :eek:. Anyway, this guy comes up in digital camo pants and says "Wow, you're really good, almost as good as a special ops sniper I ran with in Iraq." Instantly my B.S. detector went off, and my friend asked him what company he was in, rank, etc. This "experienced operator" couldn't answer most of those questions. He left pretty soon afterwards. :)
 
I used to work at a place called SynthesUSA in Monument Colorado. There was a woman who worked in sterile pack, that claimed to have inoperable brain cancer for about 5 years (O-kaay) She also claimed to be the only child of the man who invented single side band radios (or maybe it was radar) anyway Hyman Rickover was soooooo impressed W/ her daddy that he aranged for the Navy to send her to college to be a communications spook ( which is how she got the brain cancer don't-cha-know) . Now where was I ? Oh yeah! after college she was direct commisioned into the Califorina National Guard as a Major. Now this wasn't just any National Guard unit , it was a super secret unit who's sole duty was to go any where in the World on 6 hours notice to find American POWs from Viet Nam.
(But only on one weekend a month :D)

Now mind you, she didn't want you to think she was a hero no sir. The real heros were all those POWs that she helped rescue they were the heros.

Why she was so selfless that when the Navy had to discharge her for brain cancer she just took a plain old discharge instead of a medical retirement.

Given the P.C. climate at S-USA at the time I would have been reprimanded for harassment had I called her on it.
 
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I've never known anyone that talked about war experiences freely. i had one uncle that was in the second or third wave(I forget which) that stormed omaha beach. he's dead now. The only time he ever talked about it to me, he was in tears and trembling saying that he didn't deserve to live because he hid under a dead body to stay alive, and pretended to be dead. He made it until just before the battle of the bulge when he took schrapnel in the back. They sent him home and never removed the schrapnel.

The only other person to ever say anything about war experiences to me was a close buddy that once told me how he got captured by the enemy on like the second or third day out and never fired his rifle once. I don't even know what he was doing out running around with a rifle since he was trainded to fix helicopter hydraulics. I didn't ask him about it though.
 
Had a guy I worked with tell me he was a "close combat" instructor for the US Marines. (Never heard of that, CQB or CQC maybe)

He regaled me with a story one night as I drove him home (because his motorcycle was out of gas and he left his mini cooper at home... turns out neither of those existed) about how he went through sniper training and could regularly take shots out to two miles with a fifty cal.

"Hmmm." I replied. "What was your standard issue rifle?"

I was expecting M24, maybe M14 as a DMR, or heck, maybe an M82, I dunno.

"Fifty cal."

"No," I replied. "What rifle?"

"Fifty cal."

"Okay," I said. "Bolt action or semi-auto?" Thinking either Barrett 10-shot M82 or single shot bolt.

"Full auto." He replied.

Nice. A full auto sniper rifle. We truly are the world's last superpower. (Doesn't Russia have one of those?)




A few weeks later, we fired him and had him arrested for stealing a little Bulgarian girl's purse. He denied it up and down, even though we had him on tape stuffing the purse down his pants.
 
You can find these poor lost souls at any gunshow, stomping around in their combat boots, cammies and black headbands, usually with a milsurp of some sort over the shoulder and maybe a big ol' knife in a sheath strapped to a leg.:eek: Almost none of them have ever been in the military for even a day
, and they couldn't get in even if they tried. Too stupid to pass the written test, too fat and weak to pass the physical, bloodstream too poluted to pass the drug test, too goofy to pass the psych exam. Kinda feel sorry for them in a way, living in a fantasy world they will never get to experiece for real.
 
Reminds me of a guy I met in gunsmithing school. The guy was about 45 or so, morbidly obese and wore sweats with holes in them every day. Claimed to be a marine sniper on a submarine, a plank member of the Seals, former CIA operative, a machinist and an accomplished gunsmith before he started the school.

The only thing about him I believed was his name... the former military guys used to ask him questions all the time about his "experiences".... just made him stammer and stutter. But as soon as a new guy came in, he would regale them with his "stories".

Now I never served my country. I joined ROTC while in college but could not complete it due to a communication error between a chaplain and the Major in charge of my training. I have the utmost respect for those who do serve, in whatever capacity they can. But liars and fakes just get me angry.

After the guy "graduated" (he passed with a D average), he ended up getting work driving a truck for a moving company....
 
Reading this thread has made me feel pretty thankful that I've never had to interact with any liars like this. There must be a lot of them out there...I guess it's bound to happen sooner or later. I'm only 22.
 
At one of my old jobs, I would sometimes have to work the early morning shift. There was a guy working that shift who claimed that in the Air Force he had been a gunner, and that he had been issued a Desert Eagle for his sidearm.
 
Yeah, well, there's like a butt-load of gangs at my school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bo staff.
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To keep this gun-related, I'd like to mention that in order to protect my cousins, my uncle and I once had to shoot a bunch of wolverines with a frickin' 12 gauge.
 
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