Out of the choices, I'll have to go with big and slow. 2 main reasons: A bigger bullet is going to not only penetrate, but is much more likely to stay on the course it entered. Second, training is great and I recommend everyone do as much as they possibly can, but unfortunately in the bulk of situations people are overcome by adrenaline, fear, excitement, etc... and studies have shown that law enforcement are only hitting around 20 to 25% of the time.
If the shots hitting are infrequent, I sure want the biggest baddest bullet doing the hitting, so at least you have a better chance of stopping the threat before they can do something in return.
As usual, just my opinion.