changing her mind

[mattdus]

I see all kinds of threads on a few different boards that make it seem that nobody ever has any luck getting their significant other to understand or harder yet appreciate any kind if firearms. I thought I would share something good as one of my first posts on this forum.
When I first met my wife she didn't know that I had any interest in weapons of any kind. about a year after we were married she came home from work to find me and a Friend shooting pellet guns in the back yard :banghead: , she freaked out over this. after a few days of talking about this incident (I had been planning on buying my first real gun at this time) I took her out back and taught her basic firearms safety with a pellet pistol, within a few hours we were out of co2 and pellets . within the next 3 months I had picked up 2 WWII vintage rifles, the only flaw at this point was the no ammo in the house rule . it is now almost 3 years later and I load my own ammo at home (400 rounds of .45 ACP on the work bench in the next room finished today) and my wife owns a .22 rifle and is contemplating a.38 revolver for carry when she gets her CCW.
as a side note I have attached a picture of my wife shooting my first handgun a 1938 luger, (and before anyone asks why she is so low to the bench, she is sitting in a chair as she is handicapped and uses a wheelchair)


now how about sharing some of your good luck with ex anti-types

 

[Hawken50]

well a couple of weeks ago i finally got my lovely wife to hold a pistol for the first time. her timidness around guns is actually working out for me though. a couple years ago i bought her a 20ga. she shot it once and it's been mine ever since.

 

[Missashot]

Thank you for sharing your positive experience with the readers here. So glad you took the time to try to teach your wife that guns are not evil and that they do not kill anything on their own accord.
She looks like she is having a great time in the picture. Hope you guys have lots of fun shooting together.

 

[BozemanMT]

My wife comes to me last week and says "I want a CWP"
ok, fine idea
I think she might be hooked.

 

[dakotasin]

i had a blow up w/ my g/f years ago when i trudged a remington 700 25-06 thru the door. at the time, it was my 3rd rifle, to accompany my 1 handgun and 1 shotgun. and i mean the fight was huge.

finally, i told her, the guns were here before you, they'll be here after you leave... and then i went to bed.

fast forward a few years, and she ccw's a s&w 686, bought me a 637, was w/ me for my first 1911... we're married, now. i am glad the gun issue was aired out before we were married and had kids, and i'm glad she at least understands guns... careful, though... she routinely out-shoots me w/ her 223... but, i got it all over her on shotgunning, handguns, and any rifle bigger than 223.

in fact, she has a couple of her own guns... a 223 rifle, the above 686, and a 20 gauge shotgun. she is trying to commandeer a 22, but i told her to get her own...

 

[El Tejon]

Guys, the solution is right in front of us. The way to get her to do anything is to "forbid" it.

"Guns are too complicated for women."
"Not for women, men only."
"You couldn't do it."

By the time the smoke stops flowing from her ears, she will be demanding that you take her to the range at once.

 

[JamisJockey]

Initially, my wife said "no guns in my house". We were both young. Eventually, I was allowed a handgun to protect myself while out and about, and a shotgun for hunting. Now, I've got a few guns.
One day, while I was putting my carry weapon on to head out for a few days, I got "what about me?". Huh? "well, you're taking the gun out and I'm going to be home alone." So, I bought another handgun to keep here at home for her. I'm still working on convincing her she needs a CFP.

 

[Live Free Or Die]

I like this thread. It might have been done already, but it would be cool to see this thread continue along with the theme of "success stories with (initially) 'anti' spouses." Hopefully the "Divorce her and run like hell!" crowd will let us get a word in edgewise.

I've already documented my story in this thread: http://www.thehighroad.org/showthread.php?t=162457

But to summarize:

By combining calm persuasion, "don't tread on me (too much)" gumption, and persistence, I've turned my wife of 7 years from a nearly-hysterical anti into someone who is fine with guns in the house. She's willing to go to the range with me, and has indicated acceptance that I plan on teaching our children to shoot. YMMV, but to give up on a marriage rather than make a solid attempt to address the problem first...that's just crazy talk IMO.

 

[torpid]

Hopefully the "Divorce her and run like hell!" crowd will let us get a word in edgewise.

Remember, some folks with gun-appreciative spouses discovered their true love after running like hell from a previous relationship with an anti-gun person.

.

 

[halvey]

I'm still working on convincing her she needs a CFP.

I'm thinking it'd be a good idea to let HER come to that conclusion. While carrying is a right, it's still a big responsibility one should be totally ready for.

 

[Rupestris]

While watching Tales of the Gun yesterday, they had a small blurb on under cover police concealing smaller handguns. They showed the Walther PPK.

My wife (yes, she watches TOTG with me) said "I want one of those". I replied "Blued or stainless?"
"Blued".
me - "I can get you a Bersa Thunder .380 for about 1/2 the price of the PPK"
her - "But the PPK is German (she is proud of her german heritage, btw - and don't tell her that new production PPK/S isn't)".
me - "Fine, I'll make a deal with you..."
her - "what?"
me - "I'll get you the PPK after the first of the year if you go through with your CPL/CCW training."
her - deal."



When I bought my first gun, she had no idea that I was interested in shooting. She had never even thought of shooting a gun before that. I guess she wasn't anti. She was, more or less, just never raised around them, exposed to them or had any interest in 'em.

 

[Essex County]

I'm pertty fourtunate..........

My wife who is no longer an active shooter grew up in another era. As a smallish town Vermonter she belonged to the rifle club and deer hunted through college. Children, community activities, career and local polititcs just plain gobbled up her time. Yet, she always supported my obsession. She never gripes when a new " must have " comes along. She encourages my handloading and urges me to hunting.....I consider myself blessed in many regards............Essex

 

[Scout Sniper]

Unbeleavable Wife

I have an Unbeleavable Wife when we got married she knew I was a "Gun Nut" anyway she had a "Pistol" of her own a Davis P-380:banghead: her dad was a gun own so she was raised around guns so she was ok with me having guns. she went with me to the range one day with her Davis and it jammed, wouldn't hit to point of aim in other words a POS. I got here shooting my "Up-graded Browning BDA-380 carry gun, I proply lost it.:banghead: to her she has sence let me buy about 10 different firearms. and she now has a collection of her own. and she is a life member of the NRA, GOA, and has a CCW I am very Blessed is all ways

 

[ARperson]

Let me add to the "success story," but from the slightly different angle.

I remember when my husband (bf at time) got first firearm for home protection. We we discussing gun laws (KY had recently repealed the ban on CCW and guns were huge political clout depending on which side of the aisle you sat). I distinctly remember making the comment that I had no problems with firearm ownership in general, BUT (there it is!) who would need something like an Uzi for protection AND I wasn't comfortable with firearms being the only mode of protection. I thought that a security system was an absolute must...guess I didn't want to have to shoot to protect myself.

Fast forward 8 years. Happily married. We routinely have to buy 2 of everything so I can have my own. I've built my own AR. Decided on my own firearm for hunting. And I am about as close to "cold dead hands" as a person can be and not already be dead. I won't go into my thoughts on SHTF or EOTWAWKI situations since this site might be monitored but suffice it to say that a friend's wife called me "Too hard core" once when I refused to skip a shooting class at a weekend event because it was drizzling.

My only problem now is that I'm expecting in June and we've decided that we don't want to take the risk with lead poisoning the little guy (or gal). (May not be that much risk at all, but I'm not betting my child's life on it.) Rather be safe than sorry. Needless to say I'm suffering withdrawals and it's only going to get worse when deer season starts in 3 weeks. UGH!

How many of you guys have gals that complain that the CAN'T go shooting?!?

Forgot to add that I got my CCW 6 years ago and had to go through the EXTRA hoops of university "police" okay. I carry every day.

 

[torpid]

How many of you guys have gals that complain that the CAN'T go shooting?!?

*sigh*... typical gals- always complaining about something...






(I am so begging your forgiveness, it was just too tempting to resist!)
COMEDY DISCLAIMER: Women never complain unless it is absolutely justified.


.

 

[TallPine]

My wife was not an anti but she was afraid of guns, having been raised in an abusive and dysfunctional "christian" family. I wasn't all that into guns when we got married, and only had a 22 rifle since my other rifle had gotten stolen. Trying to start a business and raising a family just kind of sucked up all my time, money, and interests for a long time.

About 5 yrs ago I decided I had denied myself long enough and started buying guns as I could afford them. She seemed a little dubious at first, but there were bigger things going on at the time

Now, she is very strongly pro-RKBA even though she says she still couldn't shoot somebody to defend herself but I keep working on her on that one (got any suggestions?). She shoots with me sometimes but really doesn't like anything bigger than a 22. She is very noise sensitive even with ear plugs (she doesn't even like noisy appliances like vacumn cleaners, etc).

A while back we talked about the fact that I carry all my waking hours around the house and property, and she agreed that it made sense that if we were going to have guns then I should have one on my belt all the time. We are a long ways out in the hills.

So ... not a true conversion story, but sort of an evolution. I guess it could be worse.

 

[dakotasin]

arperson- probably a good decision not to shoot for awhile, but not for the lead: apparently a fetus' hearing can be damaged. i shoot outdoors on the farm, so lead is of no concern to me; my wife stopped shooting for her pregnancies...

 

[Scoupe]

Started off afraid of guns. Curious, but afraid. Thought they'd jump out of the bed of the truck and start shooting cars on the interstate on their on volition. Would've been funny if it wasn't so pitiful.

We drilled safety for a few days before actually going to the range. Once there, started off with a Single Six and stood as close as we dare to a plate rack I set to fall down with a puff of wind. First shot - ding! Plate falls, she turns and sweeps me (good thing I put ONE in the thing) and is giggling (not something she normally does) biggest smile ever. We worked up to Blackhawk in .357 that day and she was hooked. Started buying her own guns within two months. She now owns a nice Ruger MkII with a lot of Volquartsen parts, a Kimber Eclipse, CZ 452 American - enhanced wood, and and nice little Remington 1100 20ga skeet gun that she puts about 200 rounds a week through.

It's worked out pretty good overall. I guess.

 

[ARperson]

Now, she is very strongly pro-RKBA even though she says she still couldn't shoot somebody to defend herself but I keep working on her on that one (got any suggestions?).

Yes, but my suggestion borders on the illegal and most would probably consider it unethical. *shrug*

*sigh*... typical gals- always complaining about something...

LMAO. but ain't it the truth.

 

[Ben_Tucci]

My wife was raised in a family who basically thought guns were for criminals. She was scared of them and did not want them around. When I told her I was getting a gun and my ccw she was not happy with the idea but after I explained how the only way to defend against criminals with guns is to have one yourself and be trained in its use she softened her stance. After making it a point to show her the reports of crime in our area and also stories of people who had used firearms to protect themselves and their families and showing her that it was possible to practice safety with a firearm she is just about ready to get her own ccw I have to admit I don't understand those who say that the wife won't let them own a firearm or have ammunition in the house. I am not saying you have to be mean about or leave her if she does not like it but how can a women forbid a grown man ...she isn't your mother for goodness sakes If she leaves you over it then she didn't truly love and support you anyways.

 

[gunner03]

Mine has gotten used to the idea of me being armed.She was never ANTI- but not interested ether.She knows the plan if someone breaks in while I'm home,grab the kids and hide.What if your not home?Thats why I keep asking you to come to the range!OK show me. Have not made it yet but soon.

 

[DontBurnMyFlag]

well, for anyone that remembers, I had a very long post about how my girlfriend was on the verge of breaking up with me because of my guns. Last week she went to the range with me to watch. She didnt shoot anything besides a paintball and BB gun. When I try to teach her she gets all huffy because it sounds like Im talking down to her apparently. But thats a positive progress if you ask me.

 

[Red_SC]

It looks like my sister will be getting her first one soon. She's always lived at home or with roommates, and is about to rent my old house from me. She asked me yesterday, since she didn't know anything about guns, would I go pick one out and buy it for her, and she would pay me back. I didn't get into the whole 'straw purchase' deal, but did suggest instead that I bring a couple of them and let her shoot them and decide what she wants. I don't have a huge variety of handguns, but I'm going to bring a 1911, a 4" .357 .38's, a snubby .38, and maybe a little .25. I may see if I can borrow a Glock 9mm as well, as I don't own one.

And another benefit, having only 1 house payment is finally going to free up enough money for that AR I've been wanting forever.

 

[Oldtimer]

Want some humor and irony at the same time? Here goes!

My wonderful wife of nearly 36 years has ALWAYS been somewhat anti-gun. When I met her, I was a plant security officer, but that didn't correlate in her mind as being related to firearms....even though I was an ARMED security officer.

Less six months after we were married, I proudly became a member of law enforcement (LAPD). During the academy training, I had to take my issued handgun home every night, to clean it for the following day. She often helped me with the cleaning chores, but she was still somewhat anti-gun.

Through the years, I often bought firearms when I could afford to do so. According to our tax consultant, ANY "work-related" item that I bought was tax-deductible, if it wasn't "re-imbursable".
Additionally, that included such things as firearms that weren't "authorized" for on-duty carry, ammo, and anything closely related to "tactical" police usage. For 31 years, the firearms, ammo and other "tactical" items that I purchased were documented as "work related" on my tax forms, and I received the deductions for those purchases...with NO problem whatsoever. It was strictly 100% legal to do so, and I used it to my advantage to accumulate a VERY nice collection of "shooters".

One year before I retired, and after having bought every firearm that I wanted, we went in to have our taxes prepared. I had NOT purchased any firearms or ammo during the previous year, and our tax man noted that. "You don't have very many deductions this time!", he told us. YES, we got a refund, but not as much as it had normally been through the years before.

On the way out to our car, my wife spoke up and said, "Honey, we need to get more deductions for next year!". Without much of a pause, she added, "Maybe you should buy MORE guns!" I told her that I didn't NEED any more guns, and that after I retired, I would no longer be able to deduct them for "work related" items.

Strange, how my mind works! I recalled how former President Bill Clinton was actually DEDUCTING for donating certain items to charitable causes....and one of those items was USED UNDERSHORTS! "Slick Willie" was donating his drawers to some sort of "worthy cause", and deducting $5 per...whether they had "raspberry stains" or "Monica stains"! NO, they weren't "work related", but....I figured that if a former President could do it, I sure could!
GAWD! Then I started thinking how embarrassing it would be to "itemize" something like that on a Internal Revenue document! "20 pair of slightly soiled undershorts, donated to the Good Will".

I'm glad that I bought what I have WHEN they were deductible as "work related" items. My used undershorts get TOSSED, and there is NO way that I'd want to buy any of "Slick Willie's" hand-me-down undershorts! Heck, there might be cigar stains in them!

 

[det.pat]

my wife of almost 20 years was anti gun when we met. her first experience with guns was when she visited my apartment for the first time. now she has her own mod 66 [she's a wheelie girl] and an 870 12 gauge. she lets me have all the other cool arms.
pat