Gun shops are hobby shops- as I've said before, I could do everything I need to do with a gun with the first one I bought, a Security Six .357. The others I just like to have or shoot for one reason or the other.
Any hobby shop is going to have a "clubby" atmosphere as between the people who know the hobby and those who don't. Many years ago, when I had no kids and too much time on my hands, my wife bought me an RC car kit. I started putting it together but lost interest and put it in the basement. Years later, when my then 8 year old son started talking about RC, I dug it out and we built it together. Eventually, I took it to the local RC car shop/racetrack for help with some of the details. I got a lot of laughter and cracks about how I should have kept it as an antique, but also a lot of help making it run right and then putting in parts to make it faster.
Likewise, when we started getting into archery, I went to the local archery shop/range. They answered all my dumb questions and told me to come in Thursday night when the coaches hung out. I took the boys many Thursday nights and a couple old guys, on their own time, taught me and my sons proper form and how to be decent shots. Again, they did it just for the love of the sport.
Shooting tends to be a loner's sport. At the range, you put on earmuffs and concentrate on your own performance. It's not a sport like, say, basketball where no one gets anywhere unless they work with the rest of the team. It's also one where ignorance can get someone killed. That makes it easy to ignore or sneer at newbies who don't know a .380 from a .357. If it's going to grow, though, we have to be welcoming to the newbies and help them understand our hobby. That means that we have to put aside the standoffishness when a newbie wanders into the gun shop.
I think you also have to look at the physical surroundings. Lots of gun shops and other "guy's" hobby shops are in pre-fab metal buildings in marginal parts of town. Doesn't bother me, but my wife finds it intimidating. She likes the fancy department stores with girls wearing tons of makeup spraying perfume at passersby, swishy salesmen selling hand painted ties, and someone to bring you a cappucino as you review the latest fashions. I absolutely hate it when she drags me into that type of place. Remember Bronson Pinchot and Eddie Murphy in Beverly Hills Cop? One more reason to be welcoming- remember that it may not be the comfortable hangout we think it is. I'm not discounting my sisters or gay brothers and sisters in arms on this board, but you're the exception rather than the rule.
I may have lost my point, but you see what I mean.