Froggy
Member
True story with a happy ending -- a memorable event in the formative years of my life. Submitted as a learning opportunity for others, and as a point of discussion should anyone want to take it there.
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I was about 14 years old, living in the family home on the fringe of a large city; not the last house on the street, but the last one that was within the city limits. It was late fall / early winter; time about 8:00pm (well after dark); only a few streetlights and none nearby. As kids sometimes do, I decided I needed some time away from family so took a stroll down the block.
I was not 20 yards from the house when I was passed by a Volkswagen Beetle that came speeding along the road from behind me. It slid to a fairly quick stop just after passing me and the two occupants jumped out of their respective doors. The driver was a man in his late 30s, an inch or two shorter than me but pretty stocky. His passenger was a woman, shorter and smaller than me. It was the mid 1960s in California and they both looked like a product of that time and place -- their attire and grooming made it pretty evident they were part of the "counter culture."
Driver and passenger both hustled to the side of the road and began calling "Sandy, here boy!" Etc. Taking the bait and assuming they were looking for a lost dog, I continued walking until I was near the car. As I drew near, the man approached me to ask if I had seen their dog, which he described for me. I was barely aware of it at the time, but while he was describing the dog to me his companion stopped her lost dog routine and slipped around behind me somewhere. Suddenly, without apparent reason, the man stepped closer to me (now about 12" from his navel to mine) and asked if I lived nearby.
It was not until that moment that I was fully aware I was in pretty imminent danger. I answered his question with, "Yep, that house right there," pointing to the nearest house, which was not more than 30' away. It was a bit of a white lie, of course, but at that moment it was the right answer. I took advantage of the need to point to the house in question to take a sidestep and turn sideways so I could see both of my new friends while I gestured with my arm. As I feared, the woman was not just behind me somewhere.... she was standing directly behind me. I took a step backwards to open up some distance between us and told them I would keep an eye out for their dog.
Apparently deciding that a call for help right outside my own house might just get an answer, the man signaled his companion with a barely perceptible shake of the head. He said, "well, let us know if you see Sandy," and then he and the woman hustled back to their car and sped away. (nevermind that he had never provided a name, number, address, etc).
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I mulled over those events for quite a while and still revisit that memory from time to time. There are lots of lessons therein, and they have served me well over the years.
Even though I didn't label it with these words at the time, the need to maintain constant situational awareness was the main one. I should have been suspicious of the car that was going way too fast to be someone looking for a lost dog. And it shouldn't have taken so long to raise my suspicions when they showed more interest in surrounding and quizzing me than in continuing to search for their dog. The fact that I recognized neither them or their car as belonging to the neighborhood might have been another clue.
Keeping a safe distance is another lesson deeply learned that day... their lost dog ploy succeeded in breaching that distance... it won't be "hey, what are you looking at dirtbag?!?" from some gangsta; it will be, " hey buddy; which way is 4th Avenue from here?" Someone intent on doing you harm is going to get close to you, and he will probably use some ploy of innocence in an attempt to get you to drop your guard before closing that distance.
And, in this particular case, I think what saved me was the chance raising of the stakes to a level my would-be assailant found not worth the risk. The "lost dog" ploy gave the pair plenty of opportunity to scope out the immediate area to make sure they were unobserved and to pick just the right moment to spring their trap. But he was probably figuring out I was a kid (and not likely to have much in the way of cash) just as I was telling him my family was within spitting distance of where we stood. He weighed the risk:reward equation and decided the balance favored walking away. A lot of luck in that first encounter; since then I've learned a number of techniques to make sure that risk:reward equation stays balanced in my favor.
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I was about 14 years old, living in the family home on the fringe of a large city; not the last house on the street, but the last one that was within the city limits. It was late fall / early winter; time about 8:00pm (well after dark); only a few streetlights and none nearby. As kids sometimes do, I decided I needed some time away from family so took a stroll down the block.
I was not 20 yards from the house when I was passed by a Volkswagen Beetle that came speeding along the road from behind me. It slid to a fairly quick stop just after passing me and the two occupants jumped out of their respective doors. The driver was a man in his late 30s, an inch or two shorter than me but pretty stocky. His passenger was a woman, shorter and smaller than me. It was the mid 1960s in California and they both looked like a product of that time and place -- their attire and grooming made it pretty evident they were part of the "counter culture."
Driver and passenger both hustled to the side of the road and began calling "Sandy, here boy!" Etc. Taking the bait and assuming they were looking for a lost dog, I continued walking until I was near the car. As I drew near, the man approached me to ask if I had seen their dog, which he described for me. I was barely aware of it at the time, but while he was describing the dog to me his companion stopped her lost dog routine and slipped around behind me somewhere. Suddenly, without apparent reason, the man stepped closer to me (now about 12" from his navel to mine) and asked if I lived nearby.
It was not until that moment that I was fully aware I was in pretty imminent danger. I answered his question with, "Yep, that house right there," pointing to the nearest house, which was not more than 30' away. It was a bit of a white lie, of course, but at that moment it was the right answer. I took advantage of the need to point to the house in question to take a sidestep and turn sideways so I could see both of my new friends while I gestured with my arm. As I feared, the woman was not just behind me somewhere.... she was standing directly behind me. I took a step backwards to open up some distance between us and told them I would keep an eye out for their dog.
Apparently deciding that a call for help right outside my own house might just get an answer, the man signaled his companion with a barely perceptible shake of the head. He said, "well, let us know if you see Sandy," and then he and the woman hustled back to their car and sped away. (nevermind that he had never provided a name, number, address, etc).
-----------------
I mulled over those events for quite a while and still revisit that memory from time to time. There are lots of lessons therein, and they have served me well over the years.
Even though I didn't label it with these words at the time, the need to maintain constant situational awareness was the main one. I should have been suspicious of the car that was going way too fast to be someone looking for a lost dog. And it shouldn't have taken so long to raise my suspicions when they showed more interest in surrounding and quizzing me than in continuing to search for their dog. The fact that I recognized neither them or their car as belonging to the neighborhood might have been another clue.
Keeping a safe distance is another lesson deeply learned that day... their lost dog ploy succeeded in breaching that distance... it won't be "hey, what are you looking at dirtbag?!?" from some gangsta; it will be, " hey buddy; which way is 4th Avenue from here?" Someone intent on doing you harm is going to get close to you, and he will probably use some ploy of innocence in an attempt to get you to drop your guard before closing that distance.
And, in this particular case, I think what saved me was the chance raising of the stakes to a level my would-be assailant found not worth the risk. The "lost dog" ploy gave the pair plenty of opportunity to scope out the immediate area to make sure they were unobserved and to pick just the right moment to spring their trap. But he was probably figuring out I was a kid (and not likely to have much in the way of cash) just as I was telling him my family was within spitting distance of where we stood. He weighed the risk:reward equation and decided the balance favored walking away. A lot of luck in that first encounter; since then I've learned a number of techniques to make sure that risk:reward equation stays balanced in my favor.
