<satire>
I am a member of BORD. Our group has three stated purposes: to identify and foster human beauty for the benefit of humanity, to encourage research in the nature, characteristics and uses of good looks, and to promote stimulating social opportunities for its members. I got in by being voted Mr. Hayride 1984 at Booger Holler, Arkansas. Many of our members qualified by winning beauty pageants and such. In the case of an applicant who doesn't have such sterling credentials, there are exams of facial structure and body type that qualifies one as possessing the qualities of beauty necessary to be invited into our elite friendship. You will find that naturally handsome people are more inclined to be successful, less lonely, and more respected. You will also note that there are few left-handed people among our members. Bord, for you dummies out there, is Danish for table. We chose that as the title of our organization because we like to sit around the table and admire how beautiful we are.
You will be pleased to learn that most of our members, like those of Mensa, are members of our group for their own betterment and for the benefit and advancement of mankind. We rank and file members don't join to make ourselves feel like we are somehow better people than those hideously ugly trolls that aren't good enough for us.</satire>
I'm purty smort. I've seen enough highly intelligent fry cooks, cowpokes, roughnecks, bums, dopers, drunks, inmates, and mental patients though to convince me that it don't mean nothing to be smart. It don't give a person nor a person's opinion any more weight with me. So if Marybeth usted Savage says that something should be just so, should I agree with her just cause she's real smart?