More Gunshop Tomfoolery

[1911Tuner]

Things overheard in a gunshop are the topic of a few threads here...and having spent time behind the counter on a very busy gun shop...I've heard my share of...things.

The other day, I walked into an argument in progress, and couldn't help but overhear the comments. It was pretty obvious that it was starting to become heated...so I tried to ignore it while I browsed around.

Then, the shop owner spotted me, and motioned for me to come settle the argument. Based on what I'd already heard, I knew that the man behind the counter was right, and Happy Harry Customer was dead wrong.

"This guy says that German machinegun in WW2 fired so fast that there were 3 bullets in the barrel at the same time. I say it can't happen. What do you say?"

"Can't happen" (As I moved slightly away from the one who insisted that it was so. He was a little large...quite a bit younger than me...becoming more agitated by the second...and he wasn't made any happier at my backing my friend.)

"Well, my grandaddy fought the Germans and he said it was so, so it's so. My grandaddy oughta know whut he wuz talkin' about and you wasn't there!"

"Your grandfather was mistaken or misinformed. It can't happen. In order for the gun to have three fired bullets in the barrel at the same time, the bolt would have to cycle faster than the bullet moves. Can't happen."

Louder and more agitated:

"BY GOD! HAVE YEW EVER HEARD ONE OF THEM THINGS SHEWT! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE RATE OF FAR WUZ?"

Yep. 'Bout 1200 rounds per minute, give or take 10. That works out to 20 rounds per second...which works out to about 2 rounds in a tenth of a second. The bullets hit the muzzle at about 2800 feet per second. Not inches. Feet. The barrel is less than 28 inches long. (23 inches? 24?
I forget the specs for the MG42.)

"So?" (He was starting to try to do the math in his head at this point.)

"So...In order for the gun to put 3 bullets into a 28 inch barrel at the same time, the gun would have to cycle 100 times per second. It only cycles 20 times per second."

He's starting to blink...and then rallies. He announces that he going home to
call his grandfather and he'll come back and prove it. He stomps out and burns rubber as he hits the highway.

"I don't think he'll be back. I think he'll go look it up on the internet...get a calculator...and figure it out."

"Yep. Probably so. Too bad. I think he was gonna buy a gun."

"Win some...Lose some...and some get rained out."

"Yep."

 

[blkbrd666]

That's hilarious!!!

 

[The Tennessean]

Do you work at said shop or were you just browsing.

 

[1911Tuner]

Browsing. Stopped to see if they had any primers, and walked into a hornet's nest.

Some days it just don't pay to leave the house.

 

[Zundfolge]

Maybe his grandfather fought time traveling Germans armed with HK G11s.

 

[earlthegoat2]

What ever happened to the customer always being right?

 

[EddieNFL]

Browsing. Stopped to see if they had any primers, and walked into a hornet's nest.

Some days it just don't pay to leave the house.

No good deed goes unpunished.

 

[cyclopsshooter]

i thought this was quite humorous until i realized that tomorrow is the start of a new work week at ye ol gun store...

 

[Sam1911]

What ever happened to the customer always being right?

We have a saying at work... if you think the customer is always right, you came to the wrong company!

-Sam

 

[Milkmaster]

At least you provided a machine gun edumacation for him in about 2 minutes And maybe, just maybe, taught him to think before he speaks of things he knows nothing about.

 

[blkbrd666]

I would think, in the gun business, the customer probably needs to be brought down to earth once in a while. Else, he be trying to curve bullets around his friends...works better on TV.

 

[wishin]

LOL. As they say, "truth can be stranger than fiction".

 

[andrsnsm]

The customer is always right, even when they are dead wrong. The trick is to convince them that they thought like you in the first place. Of course in this case there are two customers so it always works out better to offend the new not so bright one rather than the regular that happens to be a buddy too.

 

[sophijo]

Grandpa

I'll bet what Grandpa meant was that it "felt" like the Germans were firing at that rate!

 

[jaysouth]

During the almost 40 years I was in the restaurant business, I could have made twice as much money if I had learned to abide stupid. Just never learned to suffer fools.

 

[sv51macross]

I think I've heard this story before, just the author left off the punchline of the joke to make it sound like a real account.

 

[Boba Fett]

What ever happened to the customer always being right?

It went out of style when too many "know it all" customers that know very little were spreading bad info to the other clueless customers



Great story 1911. I could have corrected his error like you did, but I wouldn't have had the numbers at my mental fingers like you did to back it up. Kudos!

 

[Ridgerunner665]

...good one Tuner.

I get a kick out of just hanging back and listening to the guys on both sides of the counter at the shop I frequent...only one of the employees has a clue on anything that was introduced since 1970...one other one, an older gentleman is very well versed on all the older models.


The things some people will pull out of their ... to sell something is unreal.

As is the things some people will say to make it "appear" that they know what they are talking about...

 

[jaysouth]

1911Tuner

Ya done good! More of your sage wisdom. However you might have wasted some of your talent on this one. He won't appreciate being beat over the head with hard cold facts.

 

[navyretired 1]

I Just finished working on an M-1 Carbine that was Grandpa's bring home from WWll, I said nothing when I noticed the Importers stamp on the barrel except that he should have it appraised by an expert who could tell him what those marks were for. I didn't try to make a liar out of his grandpa. His Granpa already did that.

 

[rondog]

I said nothing when I noticed the Importers stamp on the barrel except that he should have it appraised by an expert who could tell him what those marks were for.

LOL! That, sir, is called "diplomacy"!

 

[2RCO]

Sometimes it sucks to be BSing and run into someone that knows what the heck they are talking about. Looks like this guy ran into that. I've also noted over the years that many folks have been lied to by their Grandpa when it comes to guns.

 

[possom813]

Sometimes it sucks to be BSing and run into someone that knows what the heck they are talking about. Looks like this guy ran into that.

I've learned, in my short time on this rock, that there is a fine art to bs'ing. From the time I could walk I worked with my dad at 'junk' auctions and flea markets, and learned a lot from him when it came to dealing with the public.

Some of the things I witnessed around the auction(scum of the Earth folks a lot of times) was that no matter which of the two people involved in the deal were talking, at least three of them are lying.

What I mean by that is it's a precision art, H-S ain't got nothing on this kind of precision. You, as the seller, have to convince me that no matter how much crap I, as the buyer, talk and act like I know what it is, that I really don't know anything about the item, but at the same time I knew everything you already told me. The the third person steps in dressed as you and you then must convince that since I know so much about the item and it obviously will do whatever I originally thought it would do that I have to have it and you won't let me leave the store without it.

My dad taught me pretty much everything he knew about sales and customer service and taught me how to spot a liar, a thief, and a cheat. He's also the only man that I've ever heard described by the phrase, "You've got to watch out for Roger, he's the only man I know that can sell flipflops to an eskimo." I overheard that descriptive phrase from another dealer that I was helping when I was around 12 years old and working around their store for extra cash.

He retired with a small fortune from resale and I've been doing pretty decent at it myself here lately(I always wanted something better, but you can't deny what you were taught to do).

Just some thoughts, probably kind of random, I've been hopped up on hydrocodone for the past two sets off work for back pain and I just took the first pill this week about an hour ago.

 

[NinjaFeint]

What ever happened to the customer always being right?

Funny non-gun example of the customer being wrong.

I worked in an exotic pet store. A man called and said the feeder crickets we had sold him to feed his tarantula had dissolved it's insides and that he was going to sue us for the loss. I paused and then confirmed he was serious. I then told him three things he should know.

1. Anything that would do that to a tarantula would have killed the crickets five times as fast so it was not possible the crickets killed it.

2. Tarantula's will occasionally molt. Shedding their outer shell which looks like an exact copy of them but is hollow. They will then hide/burrough as their new outside hardens.

3. If he left the cage open after checking out what he though was the corpse, there is more than likely a tarantula loose in his house now.

He said "Oh Bleep" and hung up. So yeah, customer is always right.

 

[hadmanysons]

pwned