yesit'sloaded
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It depends on whether they are the eating for health vegetarians or the PETA kind.
My wife has "no opinion" on gun control.
- Thread starter Nightwing
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CDignition
Member
Well, its a good thing she dosen't vote, as she really has no power without voting. Shes free to think how she wants(liberal minded) as long as she stays a non voter. 
BridgeWalker
Member
Look up the Weston A. Price Foundation, or Sally Fallon's concept of Traditional Foods.
I don't personally subscribe to their ideas, or any other regimented diet, but there is an entire hippy moonbat subculture that avoids grains and instead eats red meat, preferably game, and cultured dairy of various kinds as the major portions of their diet.
Just one way to combat the "red meat is evil" idea.
The whole concept is based on theories about paleolithic diets and health, and is anti-industrialization, but not anti-meat. Iow, pro-hunting.
And yes, there are people who keep vegan cats. Seems pretty sad to me.
I don't personally subscribe to their ideas, or any other regimented diet, but there is an entire hippy moonbat subculture that avoids grains and instead eats red meat, preferably game, and cultured dairy of various kinds as the major portions of their diet.
Just one way to combat the "red meat is evil" idea.
The whole concept is based on theories about paleolithic diets and health, and is anti-industrialization, but not anti-meat. Iow, pro-hunting.
And yes, there are people who keep vegan cats. Seems pretty sad to me.
Prince Yamato
Member
How about just indulging her a little. So she doesn't eat meat. Who cares. Cook her a vegan meal. Go shopping at Whole Foods or Trader Joe's together. Bring up the argument when you're shopping for organic food, "man, isn't this food so much better than the food that had that 'government mandated' pesticide in it? Not exactly true, but conspiracy theory enough. Bring up how you like choice in what you eat and that you like how much better for you the organic stuff is.
Oh yeah, and when you go to Whole Foods, make sure you CCW.
Oh yeah, and when you go to Whole Foods, make sure you CCW.
We have to respect others' beliefs in order for them to respect ours. And most people form their beliefs over a long period of time and with the help of a specific cultural setting. We all absorb many social values from kiddie lit and the entertainment industry, but some of us learn enough from our own or others' experiences to question "conventional wisdom". She's just not there yet, or prefers the "happily ever after" fantasy. Who can blame her?
She's trying to do the right thing regarding her diet, and she's inclined to think along the same lines as her friends, who may be family, neighbors, and soccer moms. The trouble is that no one has all the facts, but many folks act as though they do. At some point it'll occur to her that if her friends were as smart as they appear to be, their marriages wouldn't be blowing apart or their children wouldn't be spending time in juvenile court.
This person has good qualities or you wouldn't have invested this much of your life to be with her. Build on what you have in common and respect your differences. The years will bring you closer together if you let them.
She's trying to do the right thing regarding her diet, and she's inclined to think along the same lines as her friends, who may be family, neighbors, and soccer moms. The trouble is that no one has all the facts, but many folks act as though they do. At some point it'll occur to her that if her friends were as smart as they appear to be, their marriages wouldn't be blowing apart or their children wouldn't be spending time in juvenile court.
This person has good qualities or you wouldn't have invested this much of your life to be with her. Build on what you have in common and respect your differences. The years will bring you closer together if you let them.
ForeignDude
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Take It Slow...And Compromise...
I experienced something similar with my wife, though not exactly the same.
When we met, my wife was a vegetarian, liberal-leaning, and living in a very liberal city in Maryland. The city she lived in was to MD what the Upper West Side is to NYC, or what Berkeley is to CA. She had never considered learning to shoot, nor carrying a pistol. Although we agreed on many things, we certainly didn't agree on ALL things. But I love her and she loves me, and in a solid marriage, that provides the foundation you need to find some type of solution.
In my case, I have always been a heavy consumer of sugar (lots of sugar in my coffee, lots of soda, etc.) and fast food. She was unhappy with my habits; she thought that I was shortening my life by not eating responsibly and was being insensitive to her needs (keeping me alive as long as possible). Her point was a valid one: once married, your life is no longer just your own; there is someone else in the equation now. Thus, the responsible to do is to take the needs of the other person into consideration when you make life (or death) decisions.
I presented her with a compromise: I would increase my intake of vegetables, eat fast food only on special occasions, and cut down my sugar consumption to the bare minimum. In turn, I asked her to become proficient with a pistol, to get her CCW, and to carry a concealed handgun. By this compromise, I would reduce my death risk from diet-related causes, and she could reduce her death risk from criminal violence.
We are both happy with our compromise, even if we still don't agree on all things.
I experienced something similar with my wife, though not exactly the same.
When we met, my wife was a vegetarian, liberal-leaning, and living in a very liberal city in Maryland. The city she lived in was to MD what the Upper West Side is to NYC, or what Berkeley is to CA. She had never considered learning to shoot, nor carrying a pistol. Although we agreed on many things, we certainly didn't agree on ALL things. But I love her and she loves me, and in a solid marriage, that provides the foundation you need to find some type of solution.
In my case, I have always been a heavy consumer of sugar (lots of sugar in my coffee, lots of soda, etc.) and fast food. She was unhappy with my habits; she thought that I was shortening my life by not eating responsibly and was being insensitive to her needs (keeping me alive as long as possible). Her point was a valid one: once married, your life is no longer just your own; there is someone else in the equation now. Thus, the responsible to do is to take the needs of the other person into consideration when you make life (or death) decisions.
I presented her with a compromise: I would increase my intake of vegetables, eat fast food only on special occasions, and cut down my sugar consumption to the bare minimum. In turn, I asked her to become proficient with a pistol, to get her CCW, and to carry a concealed handgun. By this compromise, I would reduce my death risk from diet-related causes, and she could reduce her death risk from criminal violence.
We are both happy with our compromise, even if we still don't agree on all things.
Tell her ""Fine, you have your reasons and beliefs as do I. Don't rag me on my "wrong-doings" and I won't harp on yours.""
I know some people like that. They love to say what you are doing wrong, but when it's your time to talk, they get defensive and agitated.
Good luck man. Maybe one day she'll see the light.
I know some people like that. They love to say what you are doing wrong, but when it's your time to talk, they get defensive and agitated.
Good luck man. Maybe one day she'll see the light.
Shawnee
member
Maybe you should try giving her a dose of her own aggressive, hard-headed medicine and when she complains point out you are just copying her. 
Roswell 1847
member
I tried giving up meat once, after a few years of having only tiny bits of meat now and then in Chinese food I came down with a Vitamin B defficiency.
Some people cannot absorb Vitamin B from suppliments, only eating meat can provide the necessary levels.
PS
An Irainian cult which is strictly vegetarian was found to have never suffered from Vitamin B defficiencies.
It was a mystery. The answer was not that appetizing.
They fertilized their vegetable patches with human waste. A microrganizm in the skin of their potatoes absorbed Vitamin B , which is produced inside the lower portion of the human intestinal tract but not absorbed by the body in any quantity.
This human produced vitamin B then became concentrated in the skin of the potatoes. Everytime they ate unpeeled potatoes they received massive amounts of Vitamin B in a form most suitable for absorption by the upper intestines.
Some people cannot absorb Vitamin B from suppliments, only eating meat can provide the necessary levels.
PS
An Irainian cult which is strictly vegetarian was found to have never suffered from Vitamin B defficiencies.
It was a mystery. The answer was not that appetizing.
They fertilized their vegetable patches with human waste. A microrganizm in the skin of their potatoes absorbed Vitamin B , which is produced inside the lower portion of the human intestinal tract but not absorbed by the body in any quantity.
This human produced vitamin B then became concentrated in the skin of the potatoes. Everytime they ate unpeeled potatoes they received massive amounts of Vitamin B in a form most suitable for absorption by the upper intestines.
papajohn
Member
Try presenting her with this scenario............you two are in a restaurant (we'll just say it's a vegan place for arguments' sake) and in walks a shady looking pair of guys. The peruse the clientele, the layout, the staff. Then then slide back out the door and go to a van on the parking lot. When you see them again they are wearing long coats, and their hands are deep in their pockets as they stride toward the door of the place, which also happens to be the only exit.
Would she rather you had a pistol in your waistband right then?
Gently remind her that despite impeccable planning, you can't make an appointment for an emergency........
Papajohn
Would she rather you had a pistol in your waistband right then?
Gently remind her that despite impeccable planning, you can't make an appointment for an emergency........
Papajohn
If the question is phrased that way, then you have already lost the battle. That assumes several things that are probably not true:
- You have the light.
- She is in darkness.
- It is your job to lead her to the light.
You also (I presume) took an oath to be her husband "till death do us part". A lot of folks on THR evidently took an oath "till death do us part, or until she disagrees with my interpretation of the Second Amendment." My vow happened to be before G-d and men, and was for the rest of my life.
I would like to suggest an alternative model to the "I am the all wise leader and she is in darkness, and it's my job to lead her to the light" fairy tale.
You entered into a partnership with this woman. You probably spoke words that implied that this was a lifetime commitment - maybe before G-d, maybe not. You further cemented this partnership by deciding to have child with her.
Now you find that you don't agree with her politics?
Instead of haranguing her with the re-cycled second rate twaddle that passes for a "pro-gun argument" on THR, I think you need to find a way understand and respect her beliefs. That's what a partnership is about.
A partnership does not mean that she has to agree with every belief of yours at every point in your marriage, or she with yours. In fact, if you stay married long enough, your beliefs will change, and so will hers. Did your vows include, "as lang as she believes what I tell her to believe"?
Many folks are confuse the notion of respecting a belief with accepting its truth. It is possible to respect a belief that you reject.
You did not marry her parents. You did not chose to have a child with her parents.
At one point in time, you respected this woman enough to chose to have child with her. You need to find some way back to that respect. Talk with her in an attempt to understand what she believes and why she believes it - not to earn debating points. If you win all the debating points in the word, and everybody on THR thinks you're the cleverest guy in the world, will all that glory matter even one bit when you are looking into your son't eyes and seeing the paint your divorce is causing him?
If you chose to have a child with a woman that you did not respect you have chosen a large task - you must find some way to respect this woman, and her beliefs. That may be a difficult. On that journey, the one question you need to ask is, "Is it fair for my son to pay the price, for my shirking this task?"
The quest in front of you is not "How do I get this woman to agree with me", but "How do I build a relationship with this woman so that my son has a warm a loving home?" The whole picture stop being about you the second he exited the womb.
The final note - and this if from a happily married man - the least likely person in the whole world to teach your wife anything is you. The day will come when she quotes the car mechanic as a font of wisdom - saying something you've told her a hundred times. She ignored it when you said it, but when he said it, it was pure genius.
By the way, there is no reason someone can't be a vegetarian and a gun owner. There is no reason someone can't be a vegetarian and member of the NRA. I am both (though to be honest, for me it more of a matter of trying to keep kosher than anything else - there are far fewer laws about vegetables than about meat).
Mike
Oleg Volk
Moderator Emeritus
Ask her: "Which level of government? Would you do what the mayor tells you to do? The governor? The President? Or any of their designates, such as the local traffic cop or DMV employee? And if you wouldn't do what some of them tell you to do, why not? Aren't they also from the government?"
Then listen to her and figure out the source of the views she holds.
The Unknown User
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Is it a "conservative" value to be intolerant of another's views when said views don't correspond with your own?
She has every right to think and practice whatever the hell she wants. Don't like it? Too bad.
She doesn't have to agree with you, and you don't have to agree with her.
She has every right to think and practice whatever the hell she wants. Don't like it? Too bad.
She doesn't have to agree with you, and you don't have to agree with her.
DWARREN123
Member
What would it take for you to change your mind on firearms and voting? She may never change, be prepared for it. You have to make decisions on if and how much this affects your marriage.
Go in peace and may your days be happy.
Go in peace and may your days be happy.
RockyMtnTactical
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I'm lucky, I have indoctrinated my wife... She is not nearly as passionate about it all as I am, but she certainly does agree that gun control is NOT the solution and that people should all be allowed to own guns.
A lot of it has to do with upbringing and the individuals own personal way of thinking... All people can be influenced... some more than others though...
A lot of it has to do with upbringing and the individuals own personal way of thinking... All people can be influenced... some more than others though...
Floppy_D
Member In Memoriam
Ask her what her "non gun" solution is to someone kicking in your front door. Don't bring guns up.
You: "Hey, I was thinking the other day. Let's say someone kicks in our front door. They could be armed or not, who knows. This isn't an unreal consideration, it has happened within 10 miles of here in the last 2 months (I guarantee). What do we do? Should we both hide under the bed and call 911? Or should you hide while I reason with the guy? What if he tries to hurt you, but he's armed, and I can't stop him? What if he shoots me first, what will you do?"
Get her brain working on it. Thinking logically converted my wife and wife's parents. They now keep a S&W Model 27 and flashlight by the nightstand. BTW, she's from the Freemont district in Seattle. If I can win that battle, you can win ANYTHING.
You: "Hey, I was thinking the other day. Let's say someone kicks in our front door. They could be armed or not, who knows. This isn't an unreal consideration, it has happened within 10 miles of here in the last 2 months (I guarantee). What do we do? Should we both hide under the bed and call 911? Or should you hide while I reason with the guy? What if he tries to hurt you, but he's armed, and I can't stop him? What if he shoots me first, what will you do?"
Get her brain working on it. Thinking logically converted my wife and wife's parents. They now keep a S&W Model 27 and flashlight by the nightstand. BTW, she's from the Freemont district in Seattle. If I can win that battle, you can win ANYTHING.
Patrick_Henry
Member
I'll repeat what has already been said a couple of times whatever it takes keep your marriage! This is not a big enough deal to give up over (at least I sure hope not) It would be great if your wife agreed with you on politics especially something as important as guns, but even if she doesn't it doesn't have to ruin what seems to have been a happy marriage thus far.
If the issue comes up use sound reason, and do not get flustered or use sensationalist appeals to emotion. I also suggest talking about justifications for weapons ownership with your friends in her presence but outside of an argument she may be more open to this kind of discussion.
But the most important thing is that if you live till your 120 owning guns and she still doesn't like it, it doesn't have to strain the relationship.
If the issue comes up use sound reason, and do not get flustered or use sensationalist appeals to emotion. I also suggest talking about justifications for weapons ownership with your friends in her presence but outside of an argument she may be more open to this kind of discussion.
But the most important thing is that if you live till your 120 owning guns and she still doesn't like it, it doesn't have to strain the relationship.
ArfinGreebly
Moderator Emeritus
I Had To Apologize
I had to apologize to my wife four years ago.
I had, it seems I neglected the family's defense, and failed to teach my children the basics of safety and responsibility with regard to the necessities of personal, community, and national defense.
We had a column of angry marchers parade right past our front door, shouting racially charged epithets, brandishing a foreign flag, and asserting their "right" to our land.
Very sobering. When my wife inquired if we were prepared to deal with something like that (while visions of the LA riots danced in my head), I had to tell her, "no."
I set about remedying that state of affairs.
Wife reluctantly agreed that she, too, needed to be prepared. She made it clear that she counted on me to deal with most of these things, but understood that I couldn't be there 24/7, any more than a policeman could.
She's still cautious of my "overstocking" -- but only as a function of fitting into the budget.
She's seen a mob up close.
Very sobering indeed.
I had to apologize to my wife four years ago.
I had, it seems I neglected the family's defense, and failed to teach my children the basics of safety and responsibility with regard to the necessities of personal, community, and national defense.
We had a column of angry marchers parade right past our front door, shouting racially charged epithets, brandishing a foreign flag, and asserting their "right" to our land.
Very sobering. When my wife inquired if we were prepared to deal with something like that (while visions of the LA riots danced in my head), I had to tell her, "no."
I set about remedying that state of affairs.
Wife reluctantly agreed that she, too, needed to be prepared. She made it clear that she counted on me to deal with most of these things, but understood that I couldn't be there 24/7, any more than a policeman could.
She's still cautious of my "overstocking" -- but only as a function of fitting into the budget.
She's seen a mob up close.
Very sobering indeed.
bluestarlizzard
Member
patrickhenry,
while i agree that marrige is a commitment and that people should take it seriously and try to comprimise and live together (even when they don't agree on something) that does not mean that a person should stick in a marriage when its OBVOUISE the fighting won't stop. FOR the KIDS sake. i grew up in a broken home. First my mom kicked out my real dad (who was an abusive alcholic) and you would not believe how much nicer things were when they were seperated. the second time was with my step dad, whom i ended up staying with because my mom was koo-koo. the fighting and pschological abuse was so bad that when my mother went to the hospital for a week, me and my dad were so relaxed that we didn't want her to come home. now that they have seperated, they can actually talk and be nice to each other. the really bad part. one of the first basic arguments between mom and dad (the step dad is the one i call dad) were about guns. she doesn't believe in the 2nd amendment nor was she willing to tolerate living with someone who does.
so i guess what i'm trying to say is that if you and your wife have no middle ground and despite REALLY working at it, maybe you should look for a devoirce laywer. from the kids point of view, seperated parents who can be there for there for their kid are MUCH better then parents who are constantly fighting in front of their kid.
liz
while i agree that marrige is a commitment and that people should take it seriously and try to comprimise and live together (even when they don't agree on something) that does not mean that a person should stick in a marriage when its OBVOUISE the fighting won't stop. FOR the KIDS sake. i grew up in a broken home. First my mom kicked out my real dad (who was an abusive alcholic) and you would not believe how much nicer things were when they were seperated. the second time was with my step dad, whom i ended up staying with because my mom was koo-koo. the fighting and pschological abuse was so bad that when my mother went to the hospital for a week, me and my dad were so relaxed that we didn't want her to come home. now that they have seperated, they can actually talk and be nice to each other. the really bad part. one of the first basic arguments between mom and dad (the step dad is the one i call dad) were about guns. she doesn't believe in the 2nd amendment nor was she willing to tolerate living with someone who does.
so i guess what i'm trying to say is that if you and your wife have no middle ground and despite REALLY working at it, maybe you should look for a devoirce laywer. from the kids point of view, seperated parents who can be there for there for their kid are MUCH better then parents who are constantly fighting in front of their kid.
liz
I don't have anything useful to contribute to the thread. Just wanted to say that this vegetarian loves guns. Looking forward to purchasing my first AK very soon. I'm in favor of life (not abortions), personal sovereignty and liberty, small government, and God.
Just sayin'.... it's never good to stereotype.
Just sayin'.... it's never good to stereotype.
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