Parable of the Tactical Peacemongers: Skunk vs Ex-Army Guy, Hand to Hand

[BerettaNut92]

I went on a church retreat over the weekend with a bunch of guys from my bible study. We had lanyard loops around our necks with nametags in them. Another member of our study spent a few years in the Army.

Duke: "Hey Skunk. I'll give you $5 if you can get the lanyard from him."
Not liking to hurt people if we can help it, Jay (the ex-Army guy) and I look at eachother sheepishly.
Skunk: "You serious?"
Duke: "Yeah, both of you got a few moves."
Skunk: "OK. Hey Jay, can I borrow your lanyard for a sec?"
Jay hands the lanyard over.
Skunk, giving lanyard to Duke*: "Here you go. Violence is always a last resort."

I know he was kidding around, but I hope he got the point that just because both of us can whack someone from 0-300 yards, doesn't mean that we're predisposed to violence. Ho hum.

*edited for clarity

 

[cool45auto]

 

[Schuey2002]

I'm still trying to get a mental picture of you "throwin' down" on someone, Skunk..

 

[DMK]

Your brain is your best weapon. Did you get your five spot?

I'll never forget when I was in high school and a whole bunch of us were hanging out at a friends house. This guy was trying to pick a fight with one of my best friends(who was a big guy) just to prove he was tough to the girls there. Finally, after this guy kept up with spewing garbage, my friend stood up and said "OK, do you want to go outside?". The guy said he did, so they walked to the door, the guy went through and my friend closed and locked it behind him. "There, now your outside." With that, he sat back down in his seat, and we turned up the radio so we didn't have to hear the guy whining on the front porch.

 

[LiquidTension]

Yeah DMK, my sensei told me a story about another sensei that did roughly the same thing. Some guy came into his dojo looking for a fight. The sensei told him ok, but that they should do it in a different room. He led the guy around to the door, let him walk through, and then closed and locked the door. Turns out the door led to the alley in the back of the building

Using your brain is usually much wiser than using your muscles (or weapon). It is usually much funnier as well

 

[blades67]

If he didn't pay you the $5, I hope you hog tied him with his own lanyard.

 

[10-Ring]

The tongue is mightier than the sword That was a quick & easy way to make 5 bucks...well done!

 

[Standing Wolf]

Definitely!

 

[Quintin Likely]

"When you can snatch the pebble from my hand, young brasshoppa..."

 

[BerettaNut92]

Didn't score my 5 dorrar....but I THINK he got the point

 

[Mute]

Or the two of you coulda whacked your friend Duke and take more than $10.

Lesson. Don't mess with people. Especially those who can deal out violence.