I'm not an old shooter, but I'm not a young one either. Just middle aged.
I love (and own) steel guns and alloy framed guns, too. There are metal framed pocket .380s out there as well, such as the NAA Guardian and the Micro Desert Eagle. I've got the NAA Guardian in .32 ACP. It is a dense little gun and the stainless is easy to care for.
However, I do own two poly pistols. The definitely have their place. Some blued steel guns with nice wood grips are just too pretty to treat like the tool that a CCW pistol would be used for. Many poly pistols with a tough finish on the steel like Glock's Tennifer are great guns that won't make you cry too bad if they get some cosmetic damage. It's a tool, much like a shovel or a sledge hammer. Just wipe it off and lube it, it keeps on tickin'.
As far as felt recoil, that will depend on the shooter, the grip shape, the weight, bore axis, caliber, action type, etc.
I have recently fired side by side my Glock 36 (.45 ACP single stack) vs. my friend's two Kimber UCIIs. They are 1911 Officers sized .45 ACP pistols with aluminum frames. One weighs only about 2.5 ounces more than the Glock 36 with empty magazines in place. The Kimber has more felt recoil, to me.
Shoot, my Taurus 85UL alloy framed snubby (with hard grip) firing .38 +P has more felt recoil than the Glock 36.
Anyway, I like steel, aluminum, or poly. I don't like all the poly guns and I don't like all the metal guns. Some just don't suit me. It just depends on the gun.