My first CCW was a S&W 642 in .38 spl +P. I rarely carry it as a primary now but when I do I don't feel terribly disadvantaged.
In wheelguns, I'd say generally a good .38spl load is my minimum. In autos, I prefer 9mm or above (though a hot .380 like COR-BON, TAP, or Speer GD would probably be sufficient).
My primary CCW for the last several months has been a SA Mil-Spec 1911 in .45ACP. I prefer to use std. pressure, 230gr loads and in all truthfulness, I've been using fmj as my carry load until I can do more range/reliability testing with my choice of defense HP (Rem. GS, Speer GD, Fed. HS, Win SXT. - all capable rounds IMHO).
With today's modern ballistics technology, just about any handgun round can be a fatal fight stopper as long as we shooters do our part. I think it's much more important to find a load that works with 100% reliability in the chosen firearm than it is to get hung up on .38spl vs. .357mag, 9mm vs. .40, .40 vs. .45, etc.
I AM a little surprised nobody's mentioned .32 H&R mag though. I really don't know much about it but what little I've read seems it'd be at least adequate as a pocket/BUG caliber.
Jack