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Squirrels On Crack?!?!

Discussion in 'General Gun Discussions' started by Fred Fuller, Oct 9, 2005.

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  1. Fred Fuller

    Fred Fuller Moderator Emeritus

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    OK- so what gun would you use to fend off an attacking crack squirrel?

    lpl/nc
    ==============
    http://icsouthlondon.icnetwork.co.u...00&headline=squirrels-on-crack-name_page.html

    Squirrels on crack
    Oct 7 2005
    South London Press

    NATURE lovers fear that squirrels could become hooked on crack cocaine plundered from addicts' hidden stashes.

    The furry animals are thought to be behind a new drugs turf war in Brixton - stealing rocks of crack hidden in front gardens.

    Tough police action to rid the town centre of dealers and addicts has seen crackheads abandon their usual drug stash hideouts.

    But the blitz has displaced some dealing into nearby residential streets.

    Drug addicts are known to be hiding small stashes of crack rocks in people's front lawns late at night.

    Squirrels have been spotted in the same front gardens, seemingly hunting out the buried narcotics.

    The discovery has led some residents to speculate that the squirrels are already in the grips of addiction. One resident, who asked for his name to be withheld, told the South London Press.

    "I was chatting with my neighbour who told me that crack users and dealers sometimes use my front garden to hide bits of their stash.

    "An hour earlier I'd seen a squirrel wandering round the garden, digging in the flowerbeds.

    "It looked like it knew what it was looking for.

    "It was ill-looking and its eyes looked bloodshot but it kept on desperately digging.

    "It was almost as if it was trying to find hidden crack rocks."

    Crack squirrels are a recognised phenomena in the US.

    They are known to live in parks frequented by addicts in New York and Washington DC.

    The squirrels have attacked park visitors in their frenzied search for their next fix.


    An RSPCA spokesman said he was unaware of the squirrels taking crack in Brixton.
    ========================================
    -or not??
    ---------
    http://www.guardian.co.uk/drugs/Story/0,2763,1587733,00.html?gusrc=rss

    South London squirrels after different kind of stash

    Patrick Barkham
    Saturday October 8, 2005
    The Guardian

    If they are not launching themselves at you in drug-fuelled desperation, their bloodshot eyes are searching for their next fix, pink paws scrabbling in the ground. Sometimes they seize upon a rock of crack hidden in front gardens, and scarper to feed their addiction.

    Squirrels in south London could have become addicted to crack cocaine, say residents of Brixton, who suggest the rodents have dug up drugs buried by dealers or nibbled residues of crack on pipes and vials discarded by addicts.

    According to internet legend, crack squirrels have terrorised residents in New York and Washington. But is the Brixton crack squirrel real or an urban myth? The Guardian began its search for the freebasing fiend near the local cinema. "They used to hang out in the little park in front of the Ritzy, twitching ... dancing to music only they could hear and generally creating a malevolent ambience," Londoner Rik Abel wrote in his blog. Ritzy regulars were less sure. "I've never seen one," said a staff member. "But there might be crack foxes around too."

    On Brixton Hill, Bim is not surprised by the spectre of the Brixton crack squirrel. "I've only been released from prison today but I've heard about the squirrels. They are scoffing all the crack, more stoned than me. Have you ever seen cats with hash? Cats always go for hash."

    There is no sign of a squirrel half-crazed on Class As along Coldharbour Lane or Rush Common - but, finally, a possible sighting. "I've just seen one jump down from an old sunflower by the Seventh Day Adventist church," said Reg Throssell. "I locked eyes with it and it stared back at me really confidently. It was scavenging and it looked scrawny."

    But Brixton crack squirrels need not worry about the police yet. "I've no knowledge of that at all," said a Scotland Yard spokesman, firmly.
     
  2. bytor94

    bytor94 Member

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    Don't let them get too close, I suggest something shooting the .50 BMG at least.
     
  3. Detritus

    Detritus Member

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    the Squirrels of Brixton ??

    sorry VERY bad joke,
    but i got about halfway through that post before "The guns of brixton" started playing through my head.....
     
  4. M-Rex

    M-Rex member

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    A 9-iron. Or my #3 Driver.
     
  5. nfl1990

    nfl1990 Member

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    #9 in my Mossberg 500
     
  6. nfl1990

    nfl1990 Member

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    That's only because I can't seem to find stores with hand grenades where I live.
     
  7. HighVelocity

    HighVelocity Member

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    I think a tennis racket would work.

    programmers.jpg
     
  8. Mumbles_45

    Mumbles_45 Member

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    Whichever one of these I managed to grab first
     

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  9. akluvr

    akluvr Member

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    Cold Steel Bad Axe. Too up close and personal? Then +1 on the .50, it saves on that whole cleaning the game thing.
     
  10. Taurus 66

    Taurus 66 Member

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    The article's not true. Crack rocks must be smoked, not eaten, and squirrels can't smoke crack.

    [​IMG]

    However, if a chipmunk can smoke cigarettes, I guess anything's possible. ;)
     
  11. Lupinus

    Lupinus Member

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    Crack is basicly a rock of cocaine unpowderd. If you eat it, it will get you high esspecialy if you chew it first. Watch a rodent eating a nut...what's the first thing he does? Knaws the living daylights out of it.

    But that's besides the point lol

    Normally I'd say .22 long

    but these are no ordinary squirrles

    no sir, these are crack squirles

    so I vote for 120mm main gun from an M1A1 Abram's
     
  12. Taurus 66

    Taurus 66 Member

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    If you eat crack, it will mess up your insides, and it could kill you. That's why police don't like buyers swallowing the stuff in plastic baggies - for fear that if the bag breaks open anywhere while inside their digestive tract, there will be a medical emergency.
     
  13. Lupinus

    Lupinus Member

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    and the same would be said for coke. That drug is a very fine line between high and overdose.
     
  14. Standing Wolf

    Standing Wolf Member in memoriam

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    It'd take a crack shot to stop one of those killer squirrels!
     
  15. eab

    eab Member

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    my ruger 10/22 with several of the 50 round mags, with redot site
     
  16. Pietro Beretta

    Pietro Beretta Member

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    A squril on crack.... just a .22lrMagnum

    Now a squirl on Phencyclidine (PCP) I would have to use a .600 Nitro Express hand cannon!
     
  17. Kurush

    Kurush Member

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    Crack squirrels are a recognized phenomenon in the US?? I guess that explains what all those squirrels were doing milling around uptown in latex skirts and tanktops yesterday :uhoh:

    I just checked and it's definitely not April 1st today so I'm obviously missing something here :confused:
     
  18. The_Antibubba

    The_Antibubba Member

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    I've heard of drug mules and gophers, but crack squirrels? If neighborhood dogs found it would they become rock hounds?
     
  19. TxCajun

    TxCajun Member

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    Please... Even if a squirrel would eat a rock (very doubtful), it would surely be a lethal overdose for a 2 pound squirrel. :(
     
  20. Red Dragon

    Red Dragon Member

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    story looks like total BS

    1st thing that leads me to believe it is this quote:

    Have you ever seen a squirrel's eyes. note the picture attached to Highvelocity's post. The whites of their eyes aren't even visible so how could this guy tell that its eyes were bloodshot.

    2nd thing is:

    if a squirrel got a hold of crack rocks and ate them he would be dead within an hour. Given the heartrate of a squirrel as well as the relative size compared to the crack rock, it would be equivalent to a human injesting a crack rock the size of a golf ball. Lethal.

    story is bogus
     
  21. MarineTech

    MarineTech Member

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    Start putting claymores in the garden overlooking little tinfoil packets as bait. Get all the little buggers at once.
     
  22. Camp David

    Camp David member

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    I don't mind the drunk squirrels in Virginia too much: :rolleyes:
    [​IMG]

    But the ones arming cannon in West Virginia scare me to death: :)
    [​IMG]
     
  23. Biker

    Biker Member

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    I'd tackle 'em the same way my Samoan Bros in Hawaii tackle wild boar - with my Bowie knife! Grrrrr....
    Biker
     
  24. Crosshair

    Crosshair Member

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    Foamy.gif

    You shal feel the wrath of Foamy.

    /www.illwillpress.com
    //Funny flash cartoons
    ///Make sure no little kids are in the room
     
  25. Lupinus

    Lupinus Member

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    Foamy is god :evil:
     
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