BigSlick
Member
Good responses.
The solution depends upon whether, you are trying to stop the activity or get some revenge.
To stop it, sit in your car, parked outside and when the miscreants come by tossing firecrackers, get them on video and follow them home to see where they live. Then call the cops. If they won't do anything, then call your lawyer and sue the little mullets and their parents for mental distress. Surely you can find some bottom feeder or a lawyer that needs to make a child support payment.
To evoke revenge, park up the street from your house and watch for them to do the drive by. When they arrive, again tape the whole thing and follow them discretely. Wait a few hours until you're sure they are all in for the night, then take your humongous Super Soaker filled with brake fluid (DOT3 works best) and do a stealth pass by their driveway.
****** their drive by vehicle with the brake fluid. Go home and forget about it.
Otherwise, you might consider walking out to where they pass, stop the car and ask them to stop that BS (being as cool headed as possible). If they're just kids out having some harmless fun, that will probably do the trick.
If they're social miscreants, clear leather and take them down - every last one of them and then burn their car right where it sits. Then strip down, cover your body with camo paint and hide on the roof of your house.
When LE and FD show up, don your tin foil hat and hold your breath... they won't even know you're there. Then, in your most ninja-esque move of all, fade thru the roof of your house and into the shower to get all the camo off.
When the FD comes to your door, act all suprised.. OOoooohhh those POOR kids ! Offer to say a prayer for them and run crying in anguish as you close the door. Be sure you dead bolt it, one of the LE/FD crew *could* be a part time Mall Ninja (the most lethal kind) and use his Ninja powers to see thru yours and find the truth.
If this happens, it's time to fall back on your training. Stick a D-cell battery inside your body cavity and go into the Mantis. The battery will block all Mall Ninja waves (they use 123's - a D cell is much stronger), and the Mantis will propel you to the true warrior that you have trained to be.
At this point, get your Chi on and go outside and kick some serious ass. This is your neighborhood, and dammit, everyone there will rue the day The D-Cell Ninja was awakened.
Spread your horror oh mighty one, smite thine enemies without delay or remorse.
Then, when everything in your midst is destroyed (except your yard), and all adversaries are dead with their souls bound with tinfoil (so they don't go to heaven), then return here... The High Road.
And let us learn from your ferocity, stealthiness and unmatched D-Cell Ninja Wisdom.
Oh yeah... if the alarm clock goes off in the middle of you fading thru the roof or something.. hit the snooze bar and finish the job oh great one
BigSlick
The solution depends upon whether, you are trying to stop the activity or get some revenge.
To stop it, sit in your car, parked outside and when the miscreants come by tossing firecrackers, get them on video and follow them home to see where they live. Then call the cops. If they won't do anything, then call your lawyer and sue the little mullets and their parents for mental distress. Surely you can find some bottom feeder or a lawyer that needs to make a child support payment.
To evoke revenge, park up the street from your house and watch for them to do the drive by. When they arrive, again tape the whole thing and follow them discretely. Wait a few hours until you're sure they are all in for the night, then take your humongous Super Soaker filled with brake fluid (DOT3 works best) and do a stealth pass by their driveway.
****** their drive by vehicle with the brake fluid. Go home and forget about it.
Otherwise, you might consider walking out to where they pass, stop the car and ask them to stop that BS (being as cool headed as possible). If they're just kids out having some harmless fun, that will probably do the trick.
If they're social miscreants, clear leather and take them down - every last one of them and then burn their car right where it sits. Then strip down, cover your body with camo paint and hide on the roof of your house.
When LE and FD show up, don your tin foil hat and hold your breath... they won't even know you're there. Then, in your most ninja-esque move of all, fade thru the roof of your house and into the shower to get all the camo off.
When the FD comes to your door, act all suprised.. OOoooohhh those POOR kids ! Offer to say a prayer for them and run crying in anguish as you close the door. Be sure you dead bolt it, one of the LE/FD crew *could* be a part time Mall Ninja (the most lethal kind) and use his Ninja powers to see thru yours and find the truth.
If this happens, it's time to fall back on your training. Stick a D-cell battery inside your body cavity and go into the Mantis. The battery will block all Mall Ninja waves (they use 123's - a D cell is much stronger), and the Mantis will propel you to the true warrior that you have trained to be.
At this point, get your Chi on and go outside and kick some serious ass. This is your neighborhood, and dammit, everyone there will rue the day The D-Cell Ninja was awakened.
Spread your horror oh mighty one, smite thine enemies without delay or remorse.
Then, when everything in your midst is destroyed (except your yard), and all adversaries are dead with their souls bound with tinfoil (so they don't go to heaven), then return here... The High Road.
And let us learn from your ferocity, stealthiness and unmatched D-Cell Ninja Wisdom.
Oh yeah... if the alarm clock goes off in the middle of you fading thru the roof or something.. hit the snooze bar and finish the job oh great one
BigSlick