All I can say is, if you think a 30-30 Winchester 94 kicks, you haven't shot enough rifles that really kick.
Ain't it the truth! After I got my .22 Single Shot Boy Scout rifle for Christmas when I was 11, Dad got me a pre 64 Winchester model 94 for my birthday, when I was 12. And, I killed my first deer that year too. I used that 30-30 on everything that walks or crawls here in Idaho till I was about 25. So, the recoil is second nature to me.
With that said, I would never use a rifle as a home defense gun inside my home. Not an AR, SKS or anything similar. I do have a 12 gage with 00 buck just in case, which also presents some problems. Otherwise I use my 9mm for HD. And, I worry about over penetration with it.
If one lives in town, one doesn't have the right to jeopardize innocent lives next door or across the alley when protecting one's own life or property. If one lives in the country where neighbors are few and far between, then that's another story. But, generally, for me, a rifle just isn't plausible in a home defense situation; because, I live in town.
However, in a self defense situation that takes place outside the home, where bullet trajectory won't jeopardize innocent lives, I'll opt for a rifle every time.
I can see why people use a pistol calibers for their rifle. It's convenient. But, I just can’t see it for me. I like a 9mm semi auto and 30-30 combo or other combo, depending on the situation.