I held an XDm Compact in 9mm today at the local big box sporting goods store. The force is strong with this one. It felt good in my hands and the trigger felt good to me with a snap cap but I am no expert. I was comparing against the Glock 19 Gen 3 and Gen 4. I liked the feel of the XDm better. This is definately on my short list for immediate buy.
A few days ago I felt the XDm full size in .45 and am thinking that one might be a tad large for my hand. But, I didn't play with backstraps on either. We'll see.
I would look at the 3.8 compact. You get a concealable compact and with the 19 round mag and extension you have practically the same size pistol as the 3.8 with full size grip.
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