You know, maybe it is WAY too easy to get a gun.

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The only people I'm aware of who think that way are people who either break the law regularly - or idolize those that do (e.g., the hip-hop "culture").

You forgot one. Prison culture.

Not to splice hairs with ya - but people who break the law regularly ARE the prison culture...eventually anyway.
 
Now, according to her, he's mister bad-ass, who WANTS someone to mess with him.

This sounds bad...and I hope that it doesn't happen...and don't take it wrong...but if that's his attitude, your concern for your daughter may take care of itself.

The old saw: "If you look for trouble, it'll find you." is scary accurate. Let's just hope that the trouble he draws is a cretin who would probably wind up getting shot sooner or later anyway. They often are.

Best of luck with this prickly issue. As a father and grandfather...I can put myself in your place. We do the best we can, and pray for success...but with kids, there just ain't any guarantees.
 
Do you want this guy reflecting on you as a gun owner?

Geez, I gotta say this a million times. I don't know about you but this guy doesn't reflect on me as a gun owner. Why? Because he breaks the law and I do not.

Do you think all rapists give men a bad name? How about all DUI's give all car drivers a bad name? Or how about a tax-evader giving all taxpayers a bad name?

Oh, I know! How about a mother who drowns her children in a bathtub gives all mothers a bad name.

Lawbreakers do not reflect on anyone but themselves.
 
Didn't read all of the posts on this now very popular topic... But, if you'd like my take on it:

The one thing that should provide you with some peace of mind is that you also have access to your weapons, and that really levels the playing field if this idiot does try to embark on a violent assault against your family.

He definitely sounds like someone who shouldn't have a gun, and folks who are against gun ownership often bring these cases forward as an argument for disarming our society.

My ultimate peace with my decision to advocate (somewhat) liberal gun ownership concerns the equalization of power which it provides... By way of example: because my wife has a gun, she can effectively and safely defend herself from an attack by an armed or unarmed attacker who is much larger and stronger than her... despite being a 5'01" 120lb female (by the same token, you have the ability to protect your family from this obviously younger attacker... I can't say who is "tougher" of the two of you in this case, but age is obviously not on your side in this example).

It is a shame that your daughter has this sort of taste in men; just try to keep pointing her in the right direction! A good friend (and shift partner) of mine was going through a deal recently with his daughter that wasn't much different than this... after hearing his daily stories, I can certainly sympathize with your dilema!

This is always a touchy issue on guns... On one hand we ALL know that there are people out there who have guns and shouldn't, regardless of their legal status to do so (likewise, there are also a handful of gainfully employed bad doctors, pilots, cops, bus drivers, fire fighters, etc -- and each of these can also put our society at risk). But, we need to balance the legal controls we put in place with the rights we have to defend our own family against a violent attack. I don't have the answer, and I doubt anyone else does either... But, you have my sympathy!
 
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I'm curious how Mom got the gun away from a legal adult in legal possession?
Haven't you been paying attention to the anti-gunners? Guns can easily be taken away from people who have them.

The poor lad is just lucky his mother didn't use it against him, the way the anti-gunners tell us always happens...
 
The fact that firearm access is easy for those who should not have them also allow those who need them easy access.

Those who need firearms should get them and use them, if necessary, against those who seek to harm them.

This is where the antis lose all sense of coherence and lucidity.

Anygunanywhere
 
See how easy to come to the wrong conclusion?

It is not the gun.
There have always been violent, dangerous clowns running around lose. Armed societies generally confronted and dealt with them over time.

Our society chose to disarm and "turn the other cheek" and deal with guys like this as "vicitms" who need help rather than as rabid dogs to be avoided and or put down. Our children got that message loud and clear.

Now we are arming again. Let us hope it is not too late. Keep your powder dry.

Revisit "A Clockwork Orange" for a quick primer on where we are and why.
 
Making guns harder to get for the law-abiding isn't the answer.

Here's the answer:

You get BF in the car with you, go out to the old quarry "C'mon, I wanna show you something I guarantee you'll find very interesting..."

You get out, set up a watermellon, back off to a good 10-20 yards, say "watch this!" - Pull out your .357 or whatever your handgun of choice is, and send the watermellon straigt to hell for all it's misdeeds. With the gun still in your hand, pointed at the ground, watermellon still raining down all around you, you say "That's what I'd do to anyone ever hurt or abused my daughter". Look him cold dead stone in the face and say "I don't ever want to hear of you touching a gun in anger unless your life is in danger - are we clear? Get your head on straight, boy, and life can be wonderful. But problems... problems get dealt with. Understand me?"

Without any further conversation, pack up and go back home. If he lays down any shizzle besides "yes sir" then he can walk home so he has time to think things over.
 
Back to the OP, I can completely sympathize with you, sir. You're seeing a situation in which your daughter is in danger, and at some point in your thought process you thought "how is it this idiot can get a gun?" I must have that thought a dozen times a week, seeing people in my courtroom who have no business having a gun. So, I can completely understand you having those thoughts, and not attack you for those thoughts like some have. The key here is that you had the thoughts, and didn't act on those thoughts in a way that restricted the rights of others. You posted your concerns here, and hopefully will gleen some good advice out of what's been read along the way.

I do agree your daughter is in danger. Many have said that eventually, Mr. Boyfriend will run into someone tougher and possibly end the problem for you. Your concern is if your daughter is there when this happens. A stray bullet. The other tough guy takes it out on Mr. Boyfriend and your daughter, or takes a liking to your daughter afterwards. I'll say a prayer for you. Try to show your daughter the reality, and keep yourself armed and ready in case the problem comes to your home.
 
if not a xd-9 it would have been an ax or a hammer IMHO... dont blame the ease of obtaining a firearm on his actions. firearms dont dictate your tendencies do they?
 
Act now, or forever loose your peace!

Mr. Jlbraun had it correct: felony.

The existing laws he violated are enough!

Contact your D.A. and make certain this criminal is prosecuted on each and every count.

If he is let off lightly, at this stage, I would forsee an escalation, unless some other run in with the law intervenes.

The impression is that he is being coddled. ?
 
I don't have daughters, but I have grown nieces who are like daughters to me. One was dating a scumbag for a while. Her whole family had tried to discourage her from dating him to no avail. Then one day I happened to be over at their house when he came by to pick her up. I stood up to shake his hand and Mr Wannabe Bad Ass couldn't look me in the eyes. That's when I knew I had him. Knowing he was in earshot, I told my niece: "You're old enough to make your own decisions now, but understand, if he makes you do something you don't want to do, I'll put a bullet in his head." She smiled and hugged me, in the corner of my eye, he was edging away from us. :)
I showed my niece I trusted her while also showing her I'd protect her no matter the cost. She stopped dating him a little later on. She told me that of all the family members he had met, he said that I was the only one who scared him. She told him: "Yeah, and he's the one with the gun.". After that, he was afraid to touch her. :) So she dumped him because he didn't have any balls! Funny how life works out.

Maybe let Mr.Scumbag Boyfriend know that there won't be a place in the world he can hide from you if ANY harm comes to your daughter. Whether he causes it or not. Put her safety directly in his hands. That always worked for me.
 
Knowing he was in earshot, I told my niece: "You're old enough to make your own decisions now, but understand, if he makes you do something you don't want to do, I'll make sure he knows he better never do it again."

While many of us may (or may not) feel that way, I'd discourage posting things that can hurt you ater. I'd recommend editing your comment.


-T.
 
In my experience, girls who date losers aren't excited by the loser's behavior. They are excited by the prospect of 'saving' and 'changing' him.

Yes...but thay are also excited by all of the attention they get from the drama.

My S-I-L (who is 44 and old enough to know better) just loves having her mother, her father, her sisters, and her niece get all angry and upset all over again at the latest outrage perpetrated by her BF.

I even fell for it the first couple of times. Her mother is really the only one who still gets her chain yanked every time. Everyone else has told her they don't want to hear about it any more.

This is after umpteen events and promises to leave him. The last straw for most of us was when her family went to a fair amount of time and expense to obtain a no-contact order - and she was back with by the end of the week.
 
The direct way is the best way!!!

Bruss01 could not have said it better:-
Making guns harder to get for the law-abiding isn't the answer.

Here's the answer:

You get BF in the car with you, go out to the old quarry "C'mon, I wanna show you something I guarantee you'll find very interesting..."

You get out, set up a watermellon, back off to a good 10-20 yards, say "watch this!" - Pull out your .357 or whatever your handgun of choice is, and send the watermellon straigt to hell for all it's misdeeds. With the gun still in your hand, pointed at the ground, watermellon still raining down all around you, you say "That's what I'd do to anyone ever hurt or abused my daughter". Look him cold dead stone in the face and say "I don't ever want to hear of you touching a gun in anger unless your life is in danger - are we clear? Get your head on straight, boy, and life can be wonderful. But problems... problems get dealt with. Understand me?"

Without any further conversation, pack up and go back home. If he lays down any shizzle besides "yes sir" then he can walk home so he has time to think things over.

Face to face - tell him you are aware of how he acted - tell him you interpret his action as a covert threat to your daughter - tell him you WILL NOT allow anybody to ever threaten your daughter again in such a fashion - tell him you will deal with him personally, should you find out that he displays similar behaviour towards your daughter, or any other member of your family.
 
I think that you are being overly harsh. All young men go through a phase, some sooner, some later, wherein they act sort of like this to a greater or lesser degree. It's his bad luck that it seems to be to a greater degree. Honestly, he is 21, I would call him up and invite him to go have a beer. Then talk with him about how guns and women are responsibilities to be taken seriously... Don't just preach at him, but some fatherly kind of advice, as a friend / father figure role model can go a long way with a kid like that.

LEO's call it the "badge" or something like that, when a rookie joins and then is trying to come to grips with his authorita.

EDIT:

AS FOR THREATS... First off, your daughter most likely put it in an overly dramatic spot light. No offense, but that is what daughters do.... Also, how well do you guys react to threats? We can all be macho, but at the end of the day, this kid can be better reached if someone gives a crap about him than if they threaten him. THE BONUS IS, the daughter will not like the "male bonding thing" and will most likely ditch him, or she will marry him in which case you are on a better track to a relationship with the idiot than if you shoot a bunch of watermelons as a veiled threat.
 
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