One whack with the kinetic puller for your reloads vs. three for the factory rounds, I'm betting that's your problem, you need more crimp. Even if 999 out of 1000 don't set back, it only takes that one with 50-100% more pressure to wreck you gun!
When setting up the Lee factory crip die (I thought you said that's what you used, a very good choice IMHO) I find with lead bullets I usually need about two to three turns in after first touching the seated bullet (vs. one or two for jacketed). When filling the pipeline on my Hornady progressive the extra handle force required when the first round comes to the crimp die is very obvious. I always err on the side of extra crimp.
One long shot, check your powder measure drop path to make sure there is no grease, oil, wax, etc. inside, as this can cause a "log jam" during the power drop leading to a light charge one time and a overcharge another. Not likely since your chrono's loads seem pretty consistent, but again it only has to go wrong once. Never happened to me, but I've heard it offered as a reason for poor consistancy or possible overload situations. Basically you should never find powder flakes clinging inside the drop surfaces, if you ever do is a major warning sign!
The dummy round test is a good idea when using a different bullet for the first time. Three times thru the gun with no change in OAL leaves me feeling good that crimp is adaquate, but its also wise to make it a policy to never rechamber one of your reloads, trash it if you need to clear it. Probably wise to do this with factory ammo too, but I don't unless I see signs of set back, in whach case I'd stop buying that brand for sure!
When you get your Kahr back, I'd not shoot lead bullets in it because of the "Glock-like" polygonal rifling. Kahr recently introduced a "low end" Polymer 9mm (P9 sized, I forget the name, but its ~$150 less than the P9) with standard rifling to compete on price and for those who want lead bullets for practice.
--wally.