I can definately relate to the theory that attitude matters most.
I'm a bouncer at a bar in San Marcos (slightly north of san diego), and the MOST IMPORTANT aspect of keeping trouble from happening is sheer intimidation.
I learned the hard way that a lack of confidence will bring you a problem. One night, when I was sick, and not feeling well, a couple of guys got frisky. They wanted a piece of me, and I told them to go home. Seeing the fatigue in my face, and interpreting that as an unwillingness to do violence, they attacked. Before the melee was over they were on the ground, but I had one hell of a jawache for about a week.
Another example: Consider the effectiveness of calm indifference in a confrontation. If an agitated customer wants to start a fight with a bouncer, I've seen bouncers that return the verbal attacks. (i.e. Get out, or I'll kick your
)
It doesn't work. It invariably starts fights.
My strategy, warn them that their actions will carry "serious consequences." While NOT raising your voice, and while adopting a body posture and facial expression that, imo, SCREAMS danger.
There's nothing more intimidating than a person who you TRULY believe isn't scared of you, and is calm. This drunken fool who wants to start fights sees a large bouncer, completely calm and collected. His heart is racing. He believes that you're not worried at all, even if you are scared S**Tless (I am, sometimes)
It makes people think twice.
So, to get back on topic, your attitude, steadyness of voice, lack of emotion, and calm, rational speech speak more about you than ANY weapon you may have.
James