Kali joke

[Godfather]

(yes, this is ripped off of the "where the French came from" joke)

So, when God created America, He gave California the best waves, the nicest vineyards, the balmiest weather, the hottest chicks, the best tans, and the movie industry. But this made the other states jealous. "God, why do they get everything? It seems kind of unfair," whined the rest of the country. "I guess it is pretty unfair," replied God. "Here, I don't like destroying My creation, so I'll just create a new abomination that will mar the beauty of California enough to make it equal with you other states." So God created Californian politicians.

 

[bigun15]

I like it.

 

[No_Brakes23]

Ain't it the truth.

 

[artherd]

Ain't no joke!

 

[Standing Wolf]

I thought they were spawned in hell.

 

[Crosshair]

Too bad we didn't make a North-Cal and a South-Cal. Then we could at least contain the damage better.

 

[M-Rex]

I wish we could break off of Southern California and form our own state.

 

[wallysparx]

i just sit and think "at least i'm not in new jersey!"

 

[Flyboy]

Something like a San Andreas Secession?

Alternatively, how about a new reality show called Survivor: Statehood? Every week, the States get together and vote one state out of the union.

 

[goose]

And I'm glad I'm not on the Left coast or the Least coast....I live in the "Fly over section" of the U S......thank God.

 

[No_Brakes23]

I wish we could break off of Southern California and form our own state.

I agree, but I bet we'd have the better gun laws. We got the Orange Curtain and San Diego which are both pretty red. L.A. is our biggest stain.

Y'all got all kinds of blue up thar.

But once we get this gerrymandering fixed so the good folks inland aren't getting cheated, maybe we'll all have better laws.

 

[BamBam-31]

Come on, people!! Enough, already!! Left coast, right coast, no coast, No Cal, So Cal....

DIVIDED WE FALL.

Any questions? Maybe you need Oleg to make you a poster before you get it?

:banghead:

 

[Crosshair]

I have a good one to add.

Q: What is the difference between California in 1849 vs Today?

A: In 1849 people where trying to get into California any way they could. Today, people are trying to get out of California any way they can.

 

[Black Majik]

Eh....we've still got the best waves, the nicest vineyards, the balmiest weather, and the hottest chicks.

Guns ain't the only things to rule our lives.

 

[No_Brakes23]

DIVIDED WE FALL.

Hey now, it was just a joke. The "You guys elected 'em, so quit whining" and "You should leave your family and job to live somewhere you don't like just so you can CCW and have pistol grip detmag autoloaders" comments are what bothers me.

You tell me all day long how messed up are politicians are, cuz its true.

 

[Dragun]

bam was just saying we gotta stick together....

 

[M-Rex]

You know? You Southies can have San Fransicko. Really. We won't miss it.

 

[No_Brakes23]

You know? You Southies can have San Fransicko. Really. We won't miss it.

Trade ya straight up fer L.A., (Minus mullholland, but that ain't REALLY L.A.)

Can't tell who'd get the worse deal on that one.

Throw in one o' them CCW friendly inland counties and we'll call it a deal.

 

[AStone]

I wish we could break off of Southern California and form our own state.

OK, I'll play, says the nomad currently living in OR.

Is N. CA really N. CA or S. OR?

We got better gun laws, more temperate rainforests, more desert (LOTS of BLM land), just as many microbrews, & less traffic, 'specially east of the Cascades.

Can you spell 'Cascadia'?

No truth implied; just thinking out loud.

 

[Shear_stress]

Didn't Northern California and Southern Oregon try to form their own state some time back? It was to be called "Jefferson". The idea has never completely died. Even now, a sign on I-5 south of Yreka welcomes you to "Jefferson". Better yet, the public broadcasting station out of Ashland calls itself "Jefferson Public Radio".

 

[Byron Quick]

Guns ain't the only things to rule our lives.

You're right. However, liberty should be the rule of our lives. From the vantge of Georgia, it appears to be endangered in California.

If I lived under the laws of California, I'd move if moving was still an option,i.e, if there were still places where liberty survived.

Industrial grade idiots are in control in California. Not to say that Georgia and other states are not run by idiots. But as I have stated before: Our idiots are in awe of your idiots.

And I don't really think it's the fault of native Californians. For at least a couple of generations, I believe that California has managed to attract idiots from the rest of the nation. Thus depriving the rest of the nation of many of their idiots while tragically giving idiots the majority vote in California.

But California is a prime example of the road to hell being paved with good intentions.

New Jersey? The folks from New Jersey that refer to it as Nazi Jersey aren't indulging in much hyperbole, if any. And those folks can't even claim to be staying for the good jobs, the incredible weather, the vineyards, and the hot chicks. New Jerseyans must REALLY love their families to stay in New Jersey.

 

[Henry Bowman]

Alternatively, how about a new reality show called Survivor: Statehood?

How about one more like Wife Swap? Call it Legislature Swap.

Montana and New Jersey swap legislatures for 2 weeks. For the first week, the legislators have to live by to host state's rules. Then for the second week, the state has to live by their rules. It would give NJ a taste of freedom and make MT appreciate it even more.

 

[middy]

I live in the "Fly over section" of the U S......thank God.

Amen.

 

[No_Brakes23]

For at least a couple of generations, I believe that California has managed to attract idiots from the rest of the nation.

bingo

 

[SalukiFan]

My mom always said that the country was slanted and all of the loose nuts and bolts rolled to California.

I told that to a California native (she had come to Indiana for graduate school) who was complaining about how dumb and without culture Hoosiers were. I don't think she appreciated the joke...

I never would have said a word to her if she hadn't insisted on ripping on Hoosiers and the Midwest constantly...