My daughter's essay (you will like it)

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gdcpony

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My oldest was assigned a "persuasive" essay for her class. I love the topic! She did pretty much plagiarize my letter to my reps, but it is well worth it as she hand wrote the whole dang thing and verified all my facts for me on her own. I'll let her slide just to hear how her liberal teacher reacts!

Gun Control's Ill Effects and My Solution

Have you ever asked me what my father and I do on the weekends? We shoot. Rifles, bows, and even our muzzleloaders, they all are fun to shoot and to hunt with. You should try it sometime.

Recently there has been allot of discussion about the Second Amendment and what it should or should not allow. These discussions have been focused on the semiautomatic class of weaponry more commonly called by liberal mass media “assault weapons.” There have been discussions on how many bullets a person should be able to load at once, what the weapons people buy should look like, and even what new rules can be imposed upon those who, like me, enjoy shooting my rifles legally and safely.

My family is a firm believer in the right to bear arms. I inherited that belief honestly and so I stand firm in my belief that the right to bear arms should never be infringed. If I had not been barred from this type of research on school computers, I would have needed only a few moments to prove the foolishness of any action against the Second Amendment. I wish to simply present some points for those who wish to strip lawful citizens of their right to bear arms to consider. I am to the point so forgive me, but it is only the truth.

1. Banning "assault weapons" is foolish. The total number of murders committed with all rifles total is less than that of many other instruments. Blunt objects are more commonly used as murder weapons. In fact, several states report no rifles used in homicides in 2010. The state with the most murders committed by rifles is actually California which has an Assault Weapons Ban (AWB) in place already. That alone proves the uselessness of such a rule. Connecticut, it might be worth pointing out, had an AWB in place, and it failed to prevent the tragedy in New Town. It might also noting that you are many times as likely to die today in a car accident than in this whole year by a gun of any kind.

2. Increasing Firearms regulations is also ineffective. The states with the strictest restrictions on firearms are also the ones in which most of the murders occurs. If this is looked at at the local level, those areas with the strictest laws are the most crime prone areas in the country. This can be seen in Detroit, Chicago, New York City, and many other areas. I would think that trying such a failed tactic would seem doomed to fail on a national level. Meanwhile in Kennesaw, Georgia every household is required to own a firearm and crime dropped 89% after passing the law. The crime rate remains lower than any other city of its size in the nation.

3. “Gun Free Zones” are killing Americans. My father is a Marine, sworn by Honor to defend those who cannot defend themselves. Yet, he has been stripped of that right in his own nation for his own children, for me right here, right now. I hate to think that this is true, but it is. If you look at the shootings the government is so focused on, every single one since 1950 has occurred in a place where firearms are barred. Meanwhile, there are many stories that are not drawing attention that show that having firearms present in such situations actually saves lives. I would feel much better about my brother, sister, and I attending a school where teachers are allowed to protect them properly than us being easy victims of an evil man.

4. Magazine capacity has little or nothing to do with lethality. I tested this myself. My father can change a magazine in his personal AR 15 in less than one second. Being that he is trained as a Marine, I asked my eleven year old sister to try it. After two tries she could consistently reload in less than two seconds. I can do it in one second myself. I can tell you that that will not save lives. Also consider that if you ban them, who will have them? The criminal element the government is trying to protect us against. They again will fail. It only limits our rights as lawful gun owners.

5. Registering every firearm is not likely to succeed and will be resisted by many. We will not register our rightfully owned firearms on a list that could be later used to confiscate them. There is no nation that has registered firearms and not later confiscated most or all of them. In all of those countries, the strong soon after preys upon the weak. This can be seen in the per capita crime rate in Great Britain and Australia. It can be seen melodramatically in the former Soviet Union, last century Germany, and early 20th century Turkey. I could find no nation that successfully registered firearms without a seizure and then a drastic increase in violent crimes.

6. Background checks on private sales will accomplish nothing as well. Many of the firearms used in crime are stolen. Those bought lawfully are by and large used that way. It is a near impossible law to enforce without registration, and would save no lives. Regulating the rifles my father has purchased for my sister and I would not stop anyone from stealing them and performing horrible acts with them.

7. I hate to repeat cliché terms, but the Second Amendment protects the rest of our rights. Without it we have no others. There is a direct line between that amendment and our freedom as citizens of a free nation. One of the hallmarks of the United States has always been that the people are stronger than the government. That is in place for a reason and should never be tampered with. It is the same reason that our nation still stands despite hardships that have broken other nations. This one right gives us all the power to keep things that way. Without it we become subjects rather than citizens.

If you wish to know what I would suggest, it would be simple. Leave us alone. Lawful gun owners cause no problems and save lives that are not tracked on many occasions. We are most often able to take care of ourselves. It is not us who ask for government help, but instead are always willing to offer it to anyone who may need it. We enjoy our sport shooting, hunting, and our right to self defense. We cause little trouble unless it is brought to us, and are in general the most patriotic of citizens. We need less interference rather than more.

Another idea would be to ask the media to not release the name(s) of any shooter involved with a mass shooting. They want fame and denying them that would go farther than anything shy of getting rid of “gun free zones” in reducing the occurrence of these heinous crimes. Denying these evil people the availability of easy victims like we are right now, and the fame they seek from their act would be the greatest deterrents I could imagine.

I believe in the Second Amendment even more than any other of the rights we enjoy. I simply want a life where I can enjoy those freedoms promised to me by my country. The right to bear arms guarantees that. As I have proven, no law can add such a guarantee by infringing upon that right. You cannot regulate away crime by regulating weapons. You cannot expect more regulations to do anything other than make the problem worse. I want to ask any member of the government to stand up for me by not stripping me my rights because of a wrong I did not commit.

Thank you for your time and consideration on this matter.

MaKala S.
It's just her rough draft, but I love it already.


l.jpg l.jpg
 
She is bright and writes quite well. I hope that the teacher in her school doesn't flip out over it though - sometimes an overly "high-minded liberal" teacher will unilaterally choose to exhort censorship priviledge in such matters. But, an enlightened teacher would use that also as an opportunity to teach the value of different viewpoints and effective argument.
 
informative essay. does her educator require citing her material? could be useful to back up her argument. lastly, maybe round out her closing with a notable quote from maybe b. franklin or t. jefferson?

this one came to mind: "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. It is its natural manure." (THOMAS JEFFERSON, letter to W.S. Smith, Nov. 13, 1787)

maybe it's time for a bloody refreshment =p

edit: other than that you're moulding your daughter into a great human being.
edit: oh, and passive voice ("have been", "to be", etc) is hard to convey a persuasive essay.
 
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Write that in my old school system and she would be suspended immediately and not allowed back without a psych eval.

Yeah it happened to a girl who was overheard talking about shooting with her parents during a holiday break.
 
You said it was a rough draft, but I might as well (underlines should be strikeouts). A few extra commas might not be bad.

Have you ever asked me what my father and I do on the weekends? We shoot. Rifles, bows, and even our muzzleloaders, they all are fun to shoot and to hunt with. You should try it sometime.

Recently there has been alot of discussion about the Second Amendment and what it should or should not allow. These discussions have been focused on the semiautomatic class of weaponry more commonly called by liberal mass media “assault weapons.” There have been discussions on how many bullets a person should be able to load at once, what the weapons people buy should look like, and even what new rules can be imposed upon those who, like me, enjoy shooting my rifles legally and safely.

My family is a firm believer in the right to bear arms. I inherited that belief honestly and so I stand firm in my belief that the right to bear arms should never be infringed. If I had not been barred from this type of research on school computers, I would have needed only a few moments to prove the foolishness of any action against the Second Amendment. I wish to simply present some points for those who wish to strip lawful citizens of their right to bear arms to consider. I am to the point so forgive me, but it is only the truth.

1. Banning "assault weapons" is foolish. The total number of murders committed with all rifles total is less than that of many other instruments. Blunt objects are more commonly used as murder weapons. In fact, several states report no rifles used in homicides in 2010. The state with the most murders committed by rifles is actually California, which has an Assault Weapons Ban (AWB) in place already. That alone proves the uselessness of such a law. Connecticut, it might be worth pointing out, had an AWB in place, and it failed to prevent the tragedy in New Town. It might also be worth noting that you are many times as likely to die today in a car accident than in this whole year by a gun of any kind.

2. Increasing Firearms regulations is also ineffective. The states with the strictest restrictions on firearms are also the ones in which most of the murders occurs. If this is looked at at the local level, those areas with the strictest laws are the most crime prone areas in the country. This can be seen in Detroit, Chicago, New York City, and many other areas. I would think that trying such a failed tactic would seem doomed to fail on a national level. Meanwhile in Kennesaw, Georgia every household is required to own a firearm and crime dropped 89% after passing the law. The crime rate remains lower than any other city of its size in the nation.

3. “Gun Free Zones” are killing Americans. My father is a Marine, sworn by Honor to defend those who cannot defend themselves. Yet, he has been stripped of that right in his own nation for his own children, for me right here, right now. I hate to think that this is true, but it is. If you look at the shootings the government is so focused on, every single one since 1950 has occurred in a place where firearms are barred. Meanwhile, there are many stories that are not drawing attention that show that having firearms present in such situations actually saves lives. I would feel much better about my brother, sister, and I attending a school where teachers are allowed to protect them properly than us being easy victims of an evil man.

4. Magazine capacity has little or nothing to do with lethality. I tested this myself. My father can change a magazine in his personal AR 15 in less than one second. Being that he is trained as a Marine, I asked my eleven year old sister to try it. After two tries she could consistently reload in less than two seconds. I can do it in one second myself. I can tell you that that will not save lives. Also consider that if you ban them, who will have them? The criminal element the government is trying to protect us against. They again will fail. It only limits our rights as lawful gun owners.

5. Registering every firearm is not likely to succeed and will be resisted by many. We will not register our rightfully owned firearms on a list that could be later used to confiscate them. There is no nation that has registered firearms and not later confiscated most or all of them. In all of those countries, the strong soon after preys upon the weak. This can be seen in the per capita crime rate in Great Britain and Australia. It can be seen melodramatically in the former Soviet Union, last century Germany, and early 20th century Turkey. I could find no nation that successfully registered firearms without a seizure and then a drastic increase in violent crimes.

6. Background checks on private sales will accomplish nothing as well. Many of the firearms used in crime are stolen. Those bought lawfully are by and large used that way. It is a near impossible law to enforce without registration, and would save no lives. Regulating the rifles my father has purchased for my sister and I would not stop anyone from stealing them and performing horrible acts with them.

7. I hate to repeat cliché terms, but the Second Amendment protects the rest of our rights. Without it we have no others. There is a direct line between that amendment and our freedom as citizens of a free nation. One of the hallmarks of the United States has always been that the people are stronger than the government. That is in place for a reason and should never be tampered with. It is the same reason that our nation still stands despite hardships that have broken other nations. This one right gives us all the power to keep things that way. Without it we become subjects rather than citizens.

If you wish to know what I would suggest, it would be simple. Leave us alone. Lawful gun owners cause no problems and save lives that are not tracked on many occasions. We are most often able to take care of ourselves. It is not us who ask for government help, but instead are always willing to offer it to anyone who may need it. We enjoy our sport shooting, hunting, and our right to self defense. We cause little trouble unless it is brought to us, and are in general the most patriotic of citizens. We need less interference rather than more.

Another idea would be to ask the media to not release the name(s) of any shooter involved with a mass shooting. They want fame and denying them that would go farther than anything shy of getting rid of “gun free zones” in reducing the occurrence of these heinous crimes. Denying these evil people the availability of easy victims like we are right now, and the fame they seek from their act would be the greatest deterrents I could imagine.

I believe in the Second Amendment even more than any other of the rights we enjoy. I simply want a life where I can enjoy those freedoms promised to me by my country. The right to bear arms guarantees that. As I have proven, no law can add such a guarantee by infringing upon that right. You cannot regulate away crime by regulating weapons. You cannot expect more regulations to do anything other than make the problem worse. I want to ask any member of the government to stand up for me by not stripping me my rights because of a wrong I did not commit.

Thank you for your time and consideration on this matter.

MaKala S.

Overall, very well written. What grade is she in? The length does not match what I would expect for the kid in the pictures.
 
Great job

You have a very smart young lady there with a lot of common sense. Kudos to her and great job dad. Should send that to every member of congress and to the president. Excellent job.
 
Great essay!

I have to say, I would be nervous sending that in though. Does her other work come across that well written? Just thinking the teacher might accuse her of not writing it herself? Sorry if I'm being a buzz kill lol.
 
Overall, very well written. What grade is she in? The length does not match what I would expect for the kid in the pictures.
She is now in 8th. The bow pic was from before my last deployment, and the rifle was her gift for straight A's while I was gone for it. That was 2011.

For some reason I don't catch pics of them shooting much. Usually having more fun shooting against them! It is getting hard to beat them and I am a 246/250 average shooter (USMC range)!
 
Great essay!

I have to say, I would be nervous sending that in though. Does her other work come across that well written? Just thinking the teacher might accuse her of not writing it herself? Sorry if I'm being a buzz kill lol.
She is still an "A" student so I don't think they will question her too much. Especially, when they asked her the wrong questions and got the wrong answers during her introduction last year.

"What do you do for fun?"

"Shoot my bow"

"Huh?"

"And I want to kill a coyote this year with it!"

"I need to talk to your dad"

"Why? You want to go too?"

And a few minutes later I have the phone on speaker in front of my XO with both of us laughing our butts off as the teacher is having fits explaining NC's laws about minors and weapons. The school called her old one, who informed me, and were told very simply not to antagonize me or it just get worse. No more issues since. And I have refrained from sending her in with pics like this one to show her weekends.
481522_475302095854244_502654058_n.jpg
 
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That's better than most of what I put together at that age. If she's half as lazy as I was, get her into more serious writing!

Also, 'alot' is still not a word. It's two. Still a pet peeve of mine. Just pointing that sort of thing out before a teacher does. :)
 
If it has not already been said, I will. Please let us know the outcome and what grade she gets. Good to know their are parents actually being parents and teaching real values.
 
I will. She turns in an outline tomorrow, the rough Thursday, and final on Friday. I can't wait!

The last time I met this teacher she told me that a narrative of a deer hunt where we both got a deer "was not what she expected from quiet little MaKala." She was stunned when Kala told her she got a muzzleloader for Christmas, and it was her favorite gift over a tablet, TV, and phone.

I love all three of my kids, but this is Daddy's Girl! My son is young yet for a gun (though Kala had one at his age-its a maturity thing). My middle child loves shooting her rifles, but not so much hunting and archery. This one loves her bow more than her guns (like I do to be honest), would pick a cold day in the woods over a warm day "wasted" on TV, and the smell of earth cover scent over roses.

Edit: Oh and did I mention she hates boys who can't out shoot her!
Her old sig on an archery site:
If you can't pull back my bow, don't bother asking me out.
If you can't out shoot me, quit wasting my time,
If you can out shoot me, RUN! My dad's already aiming!"

Gives me a bit of hope for her future! LOL.
 
I'm working on my fourth draft for my senior thesis on gun control. I'm losing heart because the more discussion had on the topic at my school the more it's obvious that 99% of the students, and even teaches, are pro gun. I was hoping I could shed light for some classmates but they already seem to have the same values as me. I have to present it in February. I prefer to debate than to have people agree with me.
 
I brought a copy in to work and my OIC is using it this afternoon in a meeting about the rules concerning our unit, firearms, and the Marines. He read it to the shop and company command staff and it went over excellently.

I couldn't care less what grade my daughter gets. She has an A from me. I managed to motivate three more NRA memberships out of people too. I guess she should be a recruiter for us. Her essay was much better than my original one.
 
Did anyone else notice the deer is being butchered above a mattress. That mattress looks like a crime scene.

EXCELLENT essay. BRAVO to you for the way you have raised your daughter. Well Done Sir !!
 
Excellent essay. So she doesn't get nit-picked should the teacher not like the thrust of the essay, I offer one suggestion (taken from John Lott's essay here). Key part emphasized below...

"With just one single exception, every public shooting since at least 1950 in the United States in which more than three people have been killed has taken place where citizens are not allowed to carry guns."

I can't source it at the moment, but I believe the one exception described was the Giffords shooting.
 
Did anyone else notice the deer is being butchered above a mattress. That mattress looks like a crime scene.
Yeah, I put nine in the freezer this year. Kala (pictured) put three, and her sister Kenzie put two. We don't eat beef, just venison.

All of them were cut up on that mattress. We had to keep it off the floor as we are renters here in NC. Backs in OH we would just clean up the cement after hanging three or four at a time during gun season.
 
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