Mike Irwin
Member
(I've always said, give me a .243, and winter would be over REAL quick...)
Organized Crime Connection Feared as "Louie the Lizzard" Sought for Questioning
Punxsutawney, PA, February 2, 2004 -- Cultural icon Punxsutawney Phil, who was believed by many to be able to perform long-range weather forecasts based on his shadow, was found dead in his burrow this morning, the victim of apparent foul play. Phil's age was unavilable, but he, and members of his family, have been forecasting the weather on February 2nd for at least the past 50 years.
Punxsutawney Chief of Police Roscoe "Goober" Skeetums said at a hastily assembled press conference this morning that Phil's death appears to have been homicide and was being investigated as such, but declined to elaborate on the manner in which Phil died or to speculate on a motive in the death.
"There are certain aspects that just don't add up to a natural death," said Skeetums. "I can't say more at this time, but we're certai nwe're dealing with foul play, and we are looking at several suspects."
Unnamed sources with the Pennsylvania State Police this morning confirmed that an all-points bulletin has been issued for the arrest of the former Budweiser spokescritter Louis "Louie the Lizard" Gecko, who has rumored ties to organized crime.
"We are looking very closely at Mr. Gecko," said the source. "He has motive in that he hasn't worked for several years after Budweiser fired him, and he has a history of past violence."
Several years ago Mr. Gecko allegedly attempted to electrocute the Budweiser Spokesfrogs in their swamp, and then was implicated in the hiring of a hit weasel to kill one of the frogs so that he could take its place. Although investigated, no charges were ever brought against Mr. Gecko. Some crime experts have speculated that Mr. Gecko has powerful connections with the Budweiser Clydesdales, which have shielded him from prosecution.
Organized Crime Connection Feared as "Louie the Lizzard" Sought for Questioning
Punxsutawney, PA, February 2, 2004 -- Cultural icon Punxsutawney Phil, who was believed by many to be able to perform long-range weather forecasts based on his shadow, was found dead in his burrow this morning, the victim of apparent foul play. Phil's age was unavilable, but he, and members of his family, have been forecasting the weather on February 2nd for at least the past 50 years.
Punxsutawney Chief of Police Roscoe "Goober" Skeetums said at a hastily assembled press conference this morning that Phil's death appears to have been homicide and was being investigated as such, but declined to elaborate on the manner in which Phil died or to speculate on a motive in the death.
"There are certain aspects that just don't add up to a natural death," said Skeetums. "I can't say more at this time, but we're certai nwe're dealing with foul play, and we are looking at several suspects."
Unnamed sources with the Pennsylvania State Police this morning confirmed that an all-points bulletin has been issued for the arrest of the former Budweiser spokescritter Louis "Louie the Lizard" Gecko, who has rumored ties to organized crime.
"We are looking very closely at Mr. Gecko," said the source. "He has motive in that he hasn't worked for several years after Budweiser fired him, and he has a history of past violence."
Several years ago Mr. Gecko allegedly attempted to electrocute the Budweiser Spokesfrogs in their swamp, and then was implicated in the hiring of a hit weasel to kill one of the frogs so that he could take its place. Although investigated, no charges were ever brought against Mr. Gecko. Some crime experts have speculated that Mr. Gecko has powerful connections with the Budweiser Clydesdales, which have shielded him from prosecution.
Gimme at least a day or two were its above thirty so I can get outside and shoot something.