SC: Woman Killed In Random Attack

[Fred Fuller]

http://www.wcnc.com/home/Police-Man-accused-of-rape-murder-of-30-year-old-woman-136264578.html
Police: Man killed SC woman in random attack
by MICHELLE BOUDIN / NewsChannel 36 Staff

He held the convenience store door open for her when she came in. Then he waited in his car for her to come out, and followed her car when she left. She called her grandparents, frightened, saying that a man was following her. Apparently she was forced off the road, kidnapped, sexually assaulted and then beaten to death with a baseball bat.

This kind of crime just keeps happening. Many people simply refuse to believe that a complete stranger will select them as a victim, and proceed to stalk them and attack them. They refuse to prepare themselves in any degree to try and deal with the unlikely possibility that such a thing might in reality happen to them. They don't want to think about unpleasant possibilities.

And so there are always more victims to be chosen by the predators on two legs.

I keep harping on mindset. That's because mindset is the most critical component of self defense. Without it, nothing else will really help. I saw a quote from one of the blogs a few days ago that I liked - it said Attitude will get you through times of no skill, better than skill will get you through times of no attitude.

Attitude. Pass it along to those you care about...

 

[heeler]

As a man that has a 28 year old daughter you have no idea how much things like this trouble me when I read them.
At least my daughter can handle a gun.
Unfortunately she wont carry daily.
Maybe she will one day.

 

[sm]

Lee wrote:

This kind of crime just keeps happening. Many people simply refuse to believe that a complete stranger will select them as a victim, and proceed to stalk them and attack them. They refuse to prepare themselves in any degree to try and deal with the unlikely possibility that such a thing might in reality happen to them. They don't want to think about unpleasant possibilities.

The sad reality is, one cannot change people places and things, the only thing they can change, is themselves. Another sad reality is, folks often do not change until something tragic happens to them, or someone close to them.

I blame some of today's attitude on parents not "parenting". There is a difference in being a "parent" and "parenting" a child in my book. I also blame some of the lack of attitude, and complacency to schools and gov't "shielding" kids to the reality of life, and coupled with gov't is gonna take care of them.
i.e. Security cameras will keep them safe, being a deterrent.

Ask any victim, or relative of deceased victim how well a Restraining Order kept them /relative safe from a criminal intent on doing harm.

We share in S&T all the time how "not everything defaults to gun" [Jeff W], instead one should train the brain, which is the only "default tool" one is assured of having 24/7/52.

Steve

 

[sidheshooter]

The opening lines of Cooper's "Principles of Personal Defense" are "Some people prey upon other people." He then goes on to offer an approximate number (1 in a hundred) with the caveat that it is not pertinent to dispute the mathematics of his calculation.

Cooper may well have been an optimist (certainly he was optimistic about the fairer gender, who he leaves out of his calculations) or, depending on what type of town you live in, he might be a bit pessimistic; regardless, his basic premise-upon which the book is built-remains stone cold true.

Plan well and accordingly, so that you may get on with life without dwelling upon it.

 

[Bobson]

Thanks for sharing this, Lee.

I had always intended to discuss this type of thing (and Mindset/Skillset/Toolset, etc) with my loves ones, but wasn't sure how to approach it without coming across as paranoid. I know my parents, siblings, and wife don't have the same attitude that I do in regards to SD. It's not that they think you shouldn't defend yourself - just that they don't actively pay mind to preparation or training, and certainly don't carry firearms.

Something clicked just now, and I realized I can use these types of threads to great effect in opening the eyes of my family members, even if that's a bit of a process that takes a period of time. I'll be keeping my eyes out for similar threads to forward to my family members - to serve as seeds of thought regarding SD being planted, if nothing else.

 

[Serenity]

I have a read a ton of stories over the last few weeks since I joined this forum. For some reason this one struck a chord with me, too. I have been reading the stories on gunssavelives.net, as well. I think a lot of people go into carrying with baby steps; it has been a year and a half since I got into shooting and I am just now signing up for the prerequisite course to get into a defensive course. I have no plan to carry without more training.

 

[mitchell11]

A self deffence weapon its better to have it and not need it then to need it and not have it you may only get one chance

 

[1911Tuner]

What a shame and tragedy, when a 150-dollar High Point and the will to use it could have changed the story.

The preponderance of women refuse to believe that it can happen. Even more believe that it never will...but it happens to some woman somewhere...every day of the year.

It brings to mind the tale that Paxton Quigley told in her book, of the young girl who was taken at a self-serve car wash and forced into her trunk. For several miles, her kidnapper shouted to her of the things that he planned to do to her once he got out of town.

He made one mistake. He let her keep her shoulder bag.

When he got to his chosen spot, and opened the trunk to retrieve his prize...the lass emptied the Model 36 that her father gave her into his belly and walked back to the main highway with her reloaded revolver in her hand.

This is the way these things are supposed to go.

 

[MuleRyder]

Quote:This is the way these things are supposed to go.

Yes, but unfortunately it seems more likely to go the other way. People are so consumed with their own lives and their cell phones that they have no awareness of their surroundings.

 

[Derry 1946]

Thanks for spreading the word, Lee. Very, very sad.

 

[Plan2Live]

Always Armed, Always Aware. I won't hijack the thread so minimal details but within one day of this attack, within 50 miles of this example, another incident at a convenience store leaves one wounded and one dead when they walked in on a robbery in progress. So far, no suspects. I'm sure it's true of many places in the US but it is getting increasingly violent around here. You gotta pay attention and take warning signs seriously.

 

[Mikhail Weiss]

...The preponderance of women refuse to believe that it can happen.

I spoke to one such woman once. She asked about a fight I had with a burglar, and what I might do differently were it to happen again. I said I'd probably poke an eye first. She said, “Oh, I don't know if I could do that. That could rally damage the eye.”

I said, If he's coming to do you harm, he doesn't deserve any of your kindness or consideration.

She nonetheless thought that she'd be able to reason with such a fellow and talk him out of whatever he had in mind. I said I had tried, and it hadn't worked. I even went into detail about every opportunity I had given the guy to leave and that, in pretty short order, he simply attacked anyway.

That gave her pause, as if she'd never conceived of such a thing.

 

[JohnKSa]

The preponderance of women refuse to believe that it can happen.

Not just women and not just attacks like this. From what I can tell, the vast majority of people refuse (or can't bring themselves) to believe that really bad things can happen to them, to their family or friends, or even in their general area.

I base that assessment on the first words out of the mouth of anyone being interviewed after witnessing a disaster/tragedy/atrocity/etc. They all say:

"I never thought something like that could happen ________________!"

(Fill in the blank with one of the following choices: to me/in this country/in my neighborhood/to my family/to my friends/etc.)

 

[cane]

Instead of calling her grandparents, why didn't (rhetorical question) she call 911 or drive to a well lit populated place?

 

[1911Tuner]

People are so consumed with their own lives and their cell phones that they have no awareness of their surroundings.

But she was. She noticed the guy shadowing her, and called her grandparents about it.

Instead of calling her grandparents, why didn't (rhetorical question) she call 911 or drive to a well lit populated place?

If she'd been thinking clearly, she'd have called the police and stayed in an already lighted place. Point: She didn't really really think anything would happen.

 

[JoeMal]

Point: She didn't really really think anything would happen.

I think this has a ton of merit and needs to be seriously considered. She had enough gut feeling to know something was up, but was thinking 'this will never happen to me' and she paid for that thought. If you ever get to the point where you're in that sort of situation, you think something might be wrong, you need to take action go get away from that scenario.

 

[1911Tuner]

Like my salty old grandpappy used to say:

"If it feels wrong, it probably is."

As cold as it sounds...and I truly hurt for this girl and her family...Darwin works in both directions.

 

[Plan2Live]

Instead of calling her grandparents, why didn't (rhetorical question) she call 911 or drive to a well lit populated place?

Calling Grandma was definately not the right choice. The stalk and attack occured during the day so the well lit part doesn't apply to this attack. The area is pretty rural so drivng to a populated place wasn't real convenient. From what we have heard through the local press, her car was found near grandma's house so it appears she was trying to get there. It also appears she was run off the road.

As others have said here, our thoughts go out to the family. I just hope she didn't die in vain. Hopefully someone else will hear this and start taking their personal saftey more seriously.

Over the past 5 years or so I have chatted with some of the women I work with regarding their personal safety. Many of them drive deserted stretches along their daily commute. Sometimes cell coverge is spotty. Working in an office, they mostly wear "pretty clothes" and high heels. Not one has ever told me she keeps a pair of flat shoes or sneakers in her car "just in case". I have tried reasoning with them about the difficulty of walking any distance at all in heels but none has ever taken my suggestions to heart and thrown in an old pair of more appropriate walking shoes and/or a pair of jeans, etc. None carry jumper cables, fix-a-flat or even flashlights. None carry weapons. Almost all of them say they would just sit in their car and wait for someone to come by and help them if they broke down and didn't have cell coverage. It's baffling and disheartening.

 

[95XL883]

I survived my felt wrong moment. Mine happened so fast, so last few seconds, I didn't have enough time to fully understand what my gut was telling me. In fairness, I was a small child and easily manipulated. If it wasn't for that experience, I doubt I would have much awareness today.

My point is, imo, awareness training needs to start when children are young. Therein lies the difficulty. How do you let a child be a child and yet still let them be a child.

I need to up the training level of my 13 year old now. I know my wife won't like it because this is going to start getting more specific. eg. "Are we being followed?" "Are we being watched?" "Is there anybody, or groups of anybodies, just standing around or sitting in cars?" "Is there anything out of place at this gas station as we pull in?" "What would you do if mommy and you were being followed?" "What would you do if mommy wasn't being smart if you are being followed?" But it is necessary and I'm starting whether she likes it or not. I think I can teach him and let him still be the happy kid he is. I'm just not sure exactly how I'm going to do that. I guess it is going to be mostly a matter of how I say what I say and making a game out of being aware.

 

[Loosedhorse]

Where to begin...

Unless you've actually been attacked, it is hard to break out of the mindset that, since it hasn't happened so far, it won't happen now. We don't generalize that way only about interpersonal violence; many driving fatalities are caused by incredibly risky behavior that, one can only suppose, the person engaged in (in part) because of the notion "well, I've done it before, and it hasn't killed me yet."

In short, as we all know, the young think that they will never die. And they are correct...but only for a while.

Even soldiers and police often report, during their first firefight, an initial feeling of disbelief, even incomprehension: "Why is that guy shooting AT ME?"

We all understand that our efforts are best spent on prevention, and maybe some of us figure, "Well, I'm in a good neighborhood, and I have my phone, and he can SEE I'm talking on my cell phone...

"So, I'm safe." It is probably true that we gain wisdom through surviving our experiences. But not all of us survive our experiences. Which is why wisdom is prized.

Or used to be. Now, luck is prized; wisdom takes too much effort.

 

[Fred Fuller]

http://www.wcnc.com/video/featured-videos/Video-shows-kidnapped-womans-last-moments-136355558.html
Surveillance video shows kidnapped woman's last moments

http://www.wcnc.com/home/Family-members-speak-out-after-brutal-murder-of-SC-woman-136402248.html
Family members speak out after brutal murder of SC woman

http://www.wcnc.com/home/Woman--136425973.html
Funeral held for SC woman brutally attacked, murdered

She was on the way to pick up her grandmother, to go shopping. That might explain her call to her grandparents. Apparently the area where she was run off the road was on the fringe of cell coverage, and her phone may have lost service at the time the attack started.

I don't know what kind of car she was driving, but I doubt anyone ever explained to her how to use her automobile as a weapon, if she ever needed to do so. How to perform basic reverses out of bad situations (backing up fast, J turns etc), how to avoid being rammed or forced off the road, how to ram if necessary, etc. As with most things, professional training is available in some areas.

http://www.shootingillustrated.com/index.php/10184/deal-with-it/

http://securitydriver.com/category/articles/

http://www.ssrsi.org/sr2/Transport/911drive.htm

http://www.edmunds.com/driving-tips/performance-driving-schools-by-state-and-province.html

Years ago (well, decades ago, now) I received training in what was then called high performance driving here: http://www.montevallo.edu/atsc/ . I sent a couple of family members to the school also, paying their fees as a birthday or Christmas present. In later years while I was working at USAJFKSWCSS, the center taught INTAC, the Individual Terrorism Awareness Course, which included a significant driving component. The course is taught in several places by different agencies and contractors now, for government and military personnel who are being sent to high risk areas.

 

[1911Tuner]

Lee...all to often, such training is viewed as paranoia, and the people who mention it are ridiculed and shouted down. Maybe this will be a wake-up call in her circle of friends and family at least.

 

[Deltaboy1984]

Poor kid realized something was wrong but didn't have the skillset to deal with it.

 

[Serenity]

How right you are about ridiculing, patronizing and snideness. It is difficult to stand up and say "I'm going to take what seem to you like random, extreme steps to prepare for any kind of emergency that might come my way" after a lifetime of being one of the contented masses. And then it is a "hobby" and patiently overlooked as long as it doesn't consume too much time or money. I've signed up for a "Refuse to be a Victim" class and a basic shooting skills class, as well, with the intention of working my way through basic classes to self-defense classes. I would really like to take my son to the Refuse to be a Victim class but he doesn't want to go because he's pretty sure it will be all middle aged women (and he's probably correct). So I will bring home the materials and make him read them and quiz him (it HAS to suck being my kid ).

 

[sidheshooter]

I think this has a ton of merit and needs to be seriously considered. She had enough gut feeling to know something was up, but was thinking 'this will never happen to me' and she paid for that thought. If you ever get to the point where you're in that sort of situation, you think something might be wrong, you need to take action go get away from that scenario.

A big +1. Reminds me of something that Kelly "Jim Grover" McCann once wrote, roughly: "that's the real value of less-lethal weapons; if you find yourself fishing around to check your ASP or spray, it's probably time to leave."

Ditto if you find yourself wishing you had ASP, spray, or family around; time to relocate, IMHO.