I like the lighter stuff because it recoils less, is more likely to expand due to the higher velocity, and due to that expanding and possible fragmentation, is more likely to do damage to a greater cubic area of flesh and thereby more likely to kick the attacker's body into shock due to pain, etc. stopping them. At least, that's my reasoning.
It does recoil less and it does go faster. Velocity in and of itself is pretty useless though. Lighter rounds penetrate less because of their lesser momentum. A lighter object decelerates faster when it meets resistance. As for fragmentation, if a bullet itself can fail to penetrate deep enough, imagine what small, light fragments of that bullet do. Fragmentation makes a light bullet even lighter. Fragmentation doesn't make up for lack of shot placement and in fact, can make perfect shot placement less than perfect if the now-lighter bullet fails to get deep enough into the boiler room.
Years back I did a lot of testing of handgun loads on gelatin, then took to the field and tried the same loads on live hogs (several hundred, in fact). Alot was learned. First off, I learned that gelatin is a great way to compare loads against each other, but it's a bad way to predict what they'll do in real flesh. For example, if load A penetrates 10% more than load B in gelatin, it'll generally penetrate about 10% more in flesh also. If it expands 10% more than load B in gelatin, it'll probably expand more in flesh (assuming it expands at all...flesh is more unpredictable). The fact that both loads did 10 or 12 inches in gelatin is pretty irrelavent though. Flesh penetration is often much less than gelatin penetration, but it depends on what it hits. Lungs don't offer much resistance, as they're mostly air, but skin is the equivelant of 2-4 inches of gelatin just by itself.
A few things to note about ballistic gelatin. It's tough and stretchy, but you can push a finger into it pretty easily. You can also get it to "rip" pretty easily. Try both of those the next time you're handling a roast. Cavities in gelatin and cavities in flesh are very different. Do a little hunting and that'll become evident in a hurry.
Lastly, energy and velocity in general are pretty meaningless. Let's change mindset from "stops" for a moment and take a look at failures to stop. They have happened with every cartridge from mild to wild, even multiple hits with 12 gauge. It doesn't matter if the perp took several thousand foot pounds of this mythical "energy" or not. If he didn't go down, he didn't go down. What do ALL of these reports have in common? Simple. The projectiles either missed the vitals, or they didn't penetrate deep enough to get to the vitals. That kinda disproves "energy" as any form of incapacitating mechanism and puts the burden of effectiveness on one thing; reaching the vitals. Hence why penetration is the first and foremost goal of a load. A load that both penetrates and expands is better yet, as the more the vitals are damaged, the faster the perp goes down. All the "energy" in the world is pretty useless if the vitals aren't hit. That's all been proven.
As a last observation, we're too focused on "stops" when the real thing we should be looking at is "failures". Any cartridge can produce "stops" and look good on paper. Let me explain for a moment. I doubt many people would hunt a Kodiak bear with a .22 short. Yet a few decades back, the largest Kodiak on record at the time was taken with one (kinda shows how important shot placement is). If you don't believe that, feel free to look it up yourself. Anyway, by the flawed math that is "one shot stops", that would make the .22 short a very effective Kodiak bear hunting round, since the majority of single shots taken, resulted in a stop.
I had an acquaintance many years ago that had taken 6 125 gr. .357 magnum hollowpoints dead center to the chest at point blank range during a burglary attempt on his 18 wheeler while he was asleep in it. He was able to end the threat and get himself to medical attention. He took several thousand foot pounds of "energy" yet was still able to function. Why? Because nothing immediately vital was struck. He was severely injured and it took a lot of surgery to save his life but he was able to function long enough to get help.
If we take a look at failures, things become a little clearer. A "stop" can be caused by anything from fear of being shot again, to the pain from the initial shot, or maybe he just fainted. These aren't "forced" stops. The perp simply lost interest in continuing hostilities. Yet they're counted in the statistics.
You'll never see a perp having take a serious central nervous system hit, or having their heart blown out, continue hostilities, simply because they're unable to.
I guess what I'm trying to say here is that you can "fake" a stop. Hostilities can end for a number of reasons not related to the effectiveness of the round that hit the perp. You cannot, however, "fake" a failure when a round has taken out something immediately vital.
What's this got to do with the 9mm? Everything and nothing. If the bullet makes it to where it counts, it works. If it doesn't, then it doesn't. That's the same with any cartridge. I use 9mm and .45 ACP both and I don't see any major benefit of one over the other if you choose your ammo wisely. Myself, my friends, and my family ate a lot of pork over many years while I learned that lesson. A lesson that was staring me in the face all along, but I chose to put my faith in silly paper numbers instead of using my common sense.