GF does NOT like guns...

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Hay man,

Everybody thinks they know everything and you know nothing. They are the masters and you are the slave! It life.. Thats why smart people ask questions.

This is how I got my wife (then girlfriend) and my best friends wife to enjoy the world of shooting. Ok I bent alittle. I submitted to her first demand! Made her think I was giving in on the subject. I bought a safe, 100 dollar K-mart brand one!... So now the guns are safe from all (hahahaha).. Now it was my turn!!... Next I gave her a hard time. "I'm going shooting"... She would get pissy. Then I'd ask her to come with me.. For 2 weekends she wouldn't do it. Ok... So this might not be the one. Fine... Maybe she'll get the clue. Then the third weekend came and I was going to be gone for a while.. because I bought 3 cases of clay pigeons and a case of bird shot. Told her I was going again but this time alittle further away. She didnt want me to go again!.. So I asked her again! "Do You Want To Come?" This time she said "Fine.. I'll go you, but know how I feel about this!!!" I said "Yep"..

So we got there and it was a pretty quiet ride... Got it all set up and went to town!.. Well a box of clays later she was out of the jeep!.. "Ok I might have been a little wrong" came out of her mouth!!!! I was shocked... Next thing you know shes holding the gun after 10 minutes of instruction and hands on (non-fire) training shes taking shots at some clays... Well she hit one and that was it. Took her out to dinner.. Made a day of it (kind of like shopping hahahaha). She was going to be on are side. I was determined now ...

Couple of times at the indoor range for some pistol time. You know the temperature controlled ones, that gets them all happy because they arent freezing or boiling. Try to keep them from other girls for the first couple of times though.. because when they see each other they get feminine (I know I didnt spell that right) as hell.. quotes like these pop up "O Its too loud!" , "I dont think I could do this!", and "Is this going to hurt"... Trust me I got those just 7 days after shooting a shotgun! Put her on the 9mm... Leave the 45's home... So keep it cool! No magnum cal's the lower the better for the beginning. Its just like training kids! Plus you want to shoot the same gun. If they see you trying to show off its done!... Stick a fork in it!! They want you to be equal.. So play the mind game!

Expand from there as you see progression. Mine got her girlfriend involved and it be came a weekly thing!... Shooting and Dinner! My weekends have been great ever since.

After 2 years of that all that she goes with me on all my little adventures!... I even have her shooting magnum cal's... she loves my Model 65. I hate it, but she loves it... Go figure!


Give it ago... If that doesnt work... Yahoo Personal's!!!

Willyboi
Better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6
 
You could cook up some nice long scheme to try and maybe convince her to change her mind, you run the risk of making the both of you miserable. Or you could resign to the fact that you two dont have all that much in common and resolve to go your own seperate ways.

You could also just "not talk about it" and have an ever-present source of tension playing into your relationship.

Alternately you could simply knuckle under, sell your guns and any other neat toys you may have (motorcycle, ATV, boat, monster truck, muscle car etc) and resign that you will never again do anything fun.

There is simply no sure-fire means of "changing" a person. You pick a person based on who they are. If who they are doesnt work with who you are, then you need to find someone else.
 
my suspicion is that she is unworthy of your affections. she shows no care or respect for your views. however, if you insist on winning her over you need to undestand that to win an argument with a woman you have to fight dirty - just like they do. so if she lives with you, this is what you do:
ask a VERY good friend to kick in your door at night and steal your television. when the door is kicked in she'll tell you to USE that gun of yours at which point you point out that you sold it because she didn't like it or that it isn't loaded and the ammunition is on the far side of the house or whatever. a couple weeks later you pick up your tv from your friends house and tell her you found it at a pawn shop. :evil:
if this doesn't work, she's not only a control freak, she's a stupid control freak.

still think you should pop smoke.
 
I must agree with the convert-or-dump

comments. No one should be reduced to buying vital self-defense equipment "under the radar." If you want to push the issue. Go buy one of the other firearms you want and have it sitting out on the table when she comes over and tell her you want to buy even more. Do not try to persuade her you are correct. Do not argue. Just do it. She will either 1)cave in, 2)stick around and either complain openly or sabotage your relationship in subtle ways, or 3) split. Options 1 or 3 are acceptable. The problem with option 1 is that it may really be option 2 but you won't know it until it's too late.
 
Look At It This Way:

There's a big war going on out there. It's called The Culture War.

And you are in opposing armies.

And, frankly, these two armies may never get along very well. No, we can't just play nice-nice. Whenever we've tried that, the strain eventually crumbled the foundations.

Guns, 2A issues, and individual liberty are at the heart of this war. And, it ain't gonna be settled tomorrow over brie-and-chardonnay with "Kumbaya" playing softly in the background while she displays you like a stuffed trophy for her admiring friends.

Guns are a litmus test. A test of cultural, political, and moral values and a whole bunch of other stuff.

The "other side" plays dirty, tries desperately -- mostly via sneaky games and snarky political maneuvering -- to demonize, marginalize, feminize, and homogenize us. They have their very own Entertainment Wing (Hollywood), Indoctrination Wing (schools/universities), and Communication Wing (the MainStreamMedia) as tactical weapons of attack.

We have Knowledge. Real World Experience. And Resolve.

By capitulating to such a woman, you are ignoring the Culture War -- while giving Aid And Comfort to the enemy.

Strengthen your Resolve.

Strategic Recommendation: Shun women like this. Make them pair-up with weak-knee'd-metrosexual-pacifist-wimpsnot males who lack the testicular fortitude to repell the criminal dirtbirgs who will eventually visit them some dark night.

They'll get what they deserve: a coroner to take photos of their corpses... and a cop to write up a report.

Let THEM re-populate the land with hyper-delicate offspring ("street-food") who will get eaten by the predators. This natural selection mechanism will work to the benefit of the Strong. That's a Good Thing.

Ignore this obvious political incompatibility at your own peril, my friend.
 
You can try this. Take her to one of the Cowboy Shooting Events
where men AND women do trick shooting, riding rodeo, etc. You
might stand a chance if she were to talk to other women besides
her sister, who join in on the cowboy action events.

All else fails here's a lil test for her. Tell her if she won't allow you any
more firearms, you won't stand for her getting new shoes.
Bet that'll go over well. Be interesting to see her reaction..Good luck.
 
WOW....thanks for all the replies :D

she might be a pain in the ass anti, but that could be the only issue that's really a problem for him.
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That statement about sums it up....this is really the ONLY issue we REALLY disagree on.....everything else, politics, religion, paint colors,furniture; we see eye-to-eye on. Maybe should have mentioned this in the 1st post, but we bought a house together last year, so I don't think she's just another passing GF. I'd hate to end this over guns, but I'm hooked, and there's no turning back. Like having sex :D .

The thing is, is that I feel like there's an angle that I could take to help convince her that me having guns is a GOOD THING. I just can't figure out what that angle is. I plan to take her to the range, but there aren't many in MD that I can go to (like, none that would be a good 1st experience for her). I've only got one shot at the 1st impression with the Ruger, so I don't want to blow it.

I guess I will just have to find a place to shoot, and pressure her to come out with me. Hopefully she'll take to it like some of the other significant others in this thread.

Thanks for the replies everyone....I appreciate the help, and comedic relief :cool:
 
My perspective is a bit different. My sister and I were raised around firearms, and I started shooting at age six. My sister, who is four years younger than I, has had an irrational fear of firearms for as long as I can remember.

When my sister was dating the man who is now her husband, my father and I took him shooting with us. He liked it then and does now, but my sister will not allow guns in her home. There is no debate about this (see the "irrational" statement above), and I have long since stopped arguing with her. Suffice it to say that when my family visits her family, she fumes because we (my wife and I) arrive well armed.

Due to medical issues, my father moved into my sister's home last year. I asked for him to come live with my family, but his comfort level was higher with the area in which he had spent thirty years versus my area of the country. At the time of the move, he gave me some of his firearms and he kept the rest (mostly .22's but also his Glock 36 CCW). My sister just about flipped her lid when she realized my father was storing guns (each was securely locked and ammo was stored in a different locked container) in her home. When he passed last month, the first thing she told me was, "Get those guns out of my house". I cheerfully complied since I value the guns that my father owned and used as both great tools and mementos of our shared past.

There is no rhyme or reason to my sister's views on guns. We have agreed to disagree. I cannot understand how my brother-in-law deals with her, but he seems to be happy. It would not work for me, but it works for him. In the end, that is what is important.

The reason for the above tale is simple: Do not try to change someone because it will not happen. My sister and I, raised in the same home, have vastly different views and those views will never be reconciled. If your GF is as adamant as my sister, either she will go ... or your guns will.
 
This may sound harsh.......

but get yourself a new girlfriend. I'm a little older, and maybe a little wiser. I'm constantly seeing young men and young women getting into relationships with a partner who is a little unreasonable, and maybe just a little mean. Believe me, if you begin a life with this young woman, you might as well give up guns. Your life will be a constant battle. One of you will win, and neither of you will be truly happy. Find a sweet, reasonable girl.
I know this is a little simplistic, but I think it's valid.
 
She puts a lot of value in the opinions of others (except me).
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DANGER WILL ROBINSON! DANGER!

Seriously, this one sentence ought to be a warning sign - heck, it should be a red flag, siren, and flashing red strobe - that this girl is bad news.

Read your own statement - by your own words, you must recognize on some level that she clearly places NO value on YOU at all - you're simply a thing, a meal ticket, someone to serve Her High and Mightyness.

Are you so desparate that you can't stand the thought of breaking up, that you'll do anything to please her, like some sort of lonely puppy?
 
I would say dump her.I was married to a woman who didn't like guns,and actually told me once that "either the guns go,or I go."Well,she is gone my gun collection is much larger,and my new girlfriend is a nursewho,on our first date,asked if we could go to the range.Life is much happier now.And the fact that she values everyone's opinion but yours should set off the alarms big time.Save yourself the headache and find a gal who likes the smell of gunsmoke and Hoppe's 9.You will be much happier,and your sons will grow up to be men,instead of Democrats.
 
She also is hearing from her friends that she cannot cave on this issue, because she needs to exert her right to make decisions and stick by them or some crap.
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She has the right to make decisions for HER. You have the right to make decisions for YOU.

She may not realize what she's doing, but she is violating your personhood. She wants to make YOUR decisions for you. If she doesn't want to own a gun, fine, but she has no right to make that decision for YOU.

If the roles were reversed--i.e., if she wanted to own something for herself, something she valued very deeply, and YOU wouldn't let her because YOU didn't like the item in question, your attitude would be rightly considered misogynist, controlling, and wrong. She's doing the same thing, she just doesn't see it.
 
You have bigger issues with her than guns. As others have said it all about control and authority. It's only going to get worse if she gets a ring on her finger.

If you really like her, confront her about your concerns and suggest couples counseling to get all of the issues out on the table. If she doesn't want to do it, break it off.
 
Its about Control!

It is all about control. What happens down the road when she wants control over something else in your life, say, where you work? Where you live... What will you do then? I also find it very troubling that she listens to her "friends" and not to you. When she gets angry about you having guns, she's not "exerting her right to make decisions and stick by them." She is manipulating you. Do you want this the rest of your life?

I agree with some of the other posters who've suggesting having a heart-to-heart talk with her. If she doesn't listen, then you had better be prepared to be manipulated and bullied like this as long as you are together.

Good luck, and I hope it works out for you.
 
My $.02;

This isn't about guns, this is about mutual respect. My wife and I (25yrs) both have interests the other does not share. She doesn't forbid me and I don't forbid her from pursuing them. She is not anti-gun, she just doesn't get the same thrill out of shooting as I do. She does shoot with me occasionally. I have never cross-stitched with her. Her only conditions are that food comes before guns and I keep them secure.

Last time I was in MD, I saw lots of unattached young ladies. Maybe you should find a new girlfriend.
 
It is interesting how quickly so many responses were generated by Silverbird's post. This is something that resonates with lots of guys.

The brutal truth is that most young men fail to seriously analyze the compatability of values (or lack thereof) with their girlfriends and the long term consequences that arise from that.

Most guys suffer from relationship creep (a relative of mission creep) where the relationship advances on its own momentum. Once reality sinks in a little and problems are noticed the guy next suffers from the "sunk cost fallacy". The guy is overwhelmed by the fact that he has so much invested in the relationship that he ignores or glosses over the storm warnings in the hope that things will work out. It is almost always better to pay the terrible price of admitting you've made a mistake rather than wait until the mistake become much, much bigger.

"Yes, well, everybody in Casablanca has problems. Yours may work out."
 
I fancy myself as a decent "case presenter" (read: arguer). I've presented the self-defense side, all of the "what-if's" that I know of, including hiking with bears, intruders, riots, New orleans-type scenerios, and Armageddon.
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The thing is, is that I feel like there's an angle that I could take to help convince her that me having guns is a GOOD THING. I just can't figure out what that angle is.
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The phrase you're looking for is "wishful thinking."

Logic does not work on those who choose to base their decisions on emotion.

There is exactly one argument left to try:

You should know me, and know that I am a good man -- caring, careful, prudent, responsible and trustworthy. If you don't trust me to safely own and use guns, you clearly don't trust me enough to stay with me. And I'll miss you -- for a while, anyway.
 
Man you are in deep. You can have sex with a lot of women. There are others out there. If you agree on all of those other things, conversation around your place must be pretty boring.

You are also in a financial mess. I get the sense you are lost. Too bad, we need all the shooters we can get.

My wife never even blinked when she saw my guns. Her family never hunted or had anything to do with guns. But she could tell it was important to me. She now has her own pistol, has "protected" the livestock, and shot a .410 shotgun. She thinks my AK-47 is a very beautiful gun. NO, I am not telling anyone where she is!!!! She is mine!!!! :rolleyes:
 
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