GF does NOT like guns...

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Gamalot and Darth...

I first gave her my H&R 9 shot .22. I wasn't going to start her with my 1911 ;) She seemed fine with that so we moved up to Silverbirds Ruger 9mm. He made the mistake of telling her that if she didnt hold it right it could kick back and hit her in the forehead. I assured her that it would NOT do that but she insisted that I have my hand on hers. Again, she was so scared she kept shutting her eyes when she pulled the trigger. She did this also on the 10/22 then realized that if she kept her eyes open, she could see what she was hitting thru the scope. Thats when she started getting into it.

Darth, like you said....I agree totally that its really strange that she like the rifle but is so shut off to the handguns. I can't stress how much I would like to know what her "exact" issue is with the handguns. I wouldn't be surprised if there was some kind of "incident" earlyier in her life.

Andy
 
Agreed Darth R! I've been thinking along the same lines with this one.
There could deffinately be a skeleton in the closet we and he knows not of.
A gun is a gun and to be OK with long ones and not with short ones does not add up.
I could see it if she says she does not like shooting hand guns but enjoys the rifle. The part where she is absolutely anti hand gun is a few degrees off.
The part where she puts more faith in what others have to say then what he says is way off!
Very strange indeed but not unheard of. We have a sister who we all agree must have been brought up in a different family or born on another planet.
Ofcourse, being brought up around me and my brothers might have a little to do with it. :what:
Being the youngest of four and the rule was No HITTING or rough housing with your sister. I am sure we did find other means of torture along the way :D
GO FIGURE!
Gary
 
If she doesnt like guns there are probably some other major differences in political views also. My suggestion is to sit down with her and have a serious discussion about your beliefs. It may not be worth you time to continue the relationship.
 
Cost ratio

It costs nothing to replace a girlfriend, you're not married, so no commitment. If you go temporarily brain dead and get rid of some firearms, that will cost you plenty. As several of the other posters here have said, this is just an indicator of some value differences between you two. Get out while you can. The guns themselves are not the problem, the problem is ideological and likely has no palateable solution.
 
Dinner in a questionable neighborhood late at night.
My wife had been poking jabs calling me a gun nut till I took her out to eat at night in such neighborhood. When some of the other customers walked in and looked around she asked me if I had my gun.

PS: This place wasn't really bad - to me anyways but made her nervious enough to appreciate my being prepaired.
She has no problems about it (my guns) anymore.
 
I've been married for almost 38 years.

Before marriage I observed that if you entered into matrimony thinking you are going to CHANGE the things that you didn't like about your wife to be you were just fooling yourself. No more than she could change the things she didn't like about you.

Some things are deal breakers. I have been brought up and had firearms since I was 12. I had them when I met my wife to be, and If she had said what she was or was NOT going to allow after our marriage, there wouldn't have been a marriage.

This is going to really get me some heat I think, but the absolute truth of a marriage is just this:

SOMEBODY IS GOING TO BE THE ALPHA MALE IN THE HOUSE..... If you choose to relinquish testicle control of that position, that's your problem.. And IT WILL be a problem. Most women do not want to be the "man" in the home. They want, expect, and need YOU to be that person. They will try you at different times, just as a 2nd male dog would try the Alpha. But, they don't want to win, they just need reassurance someone is in control.

I love my wife with all my heart. I try to keep a 50/50 relationship in all aspects of our marriage. BUT, when the chips are down, I make the hard decisions. I don't mean I'm better, smarter, whatever, than my wife, but I AM the dominant personality in our home.

You simply MUST make all of this clear before the "I do's", or you will forever regret it. You will be entering into a marriage that is generally either doomed to fail, or guaranteed to emasculate you.. Either option sucks.

I have no problem with a wife that might want the firearms kept in a "safe" fashion, because of small children, whatever. But in today's society you need to have the potential to protect yourself, and your loved ones, and you need to have access to a firearm for that to be a reality.

Get it worked out, or you will be facing a crappy, short duration marriage, or a crappy, long duration nightmare where you have to sit to pee......

Just my old fart opinion.. Dissenting opinions welcomed, and cheerfully ignored.

Best Wishes,
JP :D
 
Well PX15, I certainly can't see where you will get any heat over speaking the truth. Well said and this is the way it works around my house. I get to be the Boss when a Boss is needed. 99.9% of the time this never comes into play but my wife has told me many times," I am so glad we did it your way" or went with your gutt feeling on that one.
She could care less about guns, one way or the other but she has been well trained on every gun WE own, posesses a concealed carry permit and all guns are dual registered in the event one of us goes.
She loves Venison and I love to hunt large racks. Many years went by when I did not see a trophy and she did not get venison. Her decision was to take the hunters safety course and get her own tag and get her own venison.
She is not fond of killing anything but she does understand all the meat we eat was once alive and she got over it. We have not had a year since when there was not venison in our freezer. Now for the best part. If you find a woman who goes out and gets her own deer and then cooks it the way she likes it you are sure to end up enjoying a great meal. I never really cared for it until she learned how to hunt and then really learned how to cook it best.
Before she hunted, she never put alot of effort into the preparation of the meal and hence, I never enjoyed tough venison. Now, she has it down to a science, knows exactly how to cook each cut of the meat and is as proud as a peacock when she wipps up a special meal from the 5 pointer she shot.
Life is good!
Gary
 
If you decide to marry her despite all this wonderful advice, could you contact me about the 1911, and the rifle.
 
I didn't read the other responses.

Son, you need a new girlfriend. This girl not only is disrespectful she's stupid. These two conditions are not likely to change. You should run, not walk, trot, or slip away.

On the other hand. I have a daughter, age 29, who was brought up with hunters and shooters and realizes that reason is an acceptable way of life. ;) Seriously, my point is that reasonable women are out there. They understand reality, they reason (think logically) and don't simply react to every one of life's hardships AND they are flexible enough to adapt to changing conditions. They also are respectful of the feelings, interests, beliefs and thoughts of those that they "love". Your GF no more loves you than Hillary loves George.
 
Silverbird,
I don't claim to know a lot about women and most of what I do know is wrong, but I have been folowing your thread and here is what I would do. I think it would be easier to get a new girlfriend, but the easy road is not always the best road (although sometimes it is). If you truly care about the girl, and it sounds like you do, I might make the effort to try and work through the problem (no duh, right). The first thing I would do is back off the conversion attempts and give her some time to internalize the experience of shooting with you guys. Second, I would determine if I had enough funs to protect the home front for now. Third, when I felt I needed/ wanted a new gun, I would say, " I'm thinking of geting a ..., how do you feel about that?" and let her vent her spleen about it. Do not answer her concerns, just listen. Sometimes, if you let someone talk long enough, they will tell you what the real issue is. when she is done, say something along the lines of, " I guess you've given me something to think about" and if she asks you if you are still thinking about buyingthe gun tell her you don't know, you need to think about what she said. Think about what she said for a couple of days. Likely what she said is not the real issue, especially if the real issue is a painful one, it is a test to see if she can make you bend without having to deal with the painful truth. If you give in or else treat her like her opinion doesn't matter, you likely will never know what the real reason is. Come back and let her know that you are still wanting to get the gun, but you acknowledge that she has some strong feelings against it. Tell her you don't want to hurt her (you don't) and you need to understand why she feels that way. At this point understanding her should be more important then getting her approval to get the gun, so respond accordingly. If she trusts you enough to tell you the bottom line reason, you know what you are dealing with. Maybe she's afraid of you getting hurt (with cars and guns), maybe someone put a gun in her face, maybe she had a ND as a child, etc. I f you care about her, put the gun purchases on hold and help her past it (not as a ploy to get more guns, but because you don't want her walking around scarred). If her reason is that she is drinking the anti's Koolaid, better you know now. In other words, if you love her, then be loving to her (note: that does not include being a doormat) and you do that by finding out what is troubling her and working through that together. If you can do that, maybe she's the one for you. If you can't work out problems together (she doesn't trust you enoughto share her true feelings, you can't listen to her without trying to counter every statement she shares) " 'til death do us part" will seem like an awfully long time!

KJ

ps - reread the first sentence of my post! :neener:
 
Sheesh!

I've followed this whole thread. :eek:

Henceforth, Otherguy's opinion, venture forth, but do not abandon all hope.
---

Here's the deal:

The mating game is work.
The mating game works much better when one maintains objectivity.
If you lose objectivity... you lose.

Wanna meet a good mate? Work for it. Take extension courses, adult ed, just do something. The people who tell you to be patient and wait, "someone will come along," "it will happen" may well be in unsatisfactory relationships and in denial. You, most likely, will NOT find a good mate through friends (waiting). And, you most certainly won't sitting on your couch.

Be an interviewer, not an interviewee.

The absolute best strategy is to teach something. I taught adult ed for a number of years... :) Can't do that? Become an NRA Instructor. Women are now interested in self defense and guns.

Anyway, get of your butt, get out there, work at it and you just might find a treasure. You certainly won't, if you don't.

Ditch the bit*!
 
The best part about becoming an NRA instructor is that you KNOW that the people there aren't antis.
 
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