How likely are you to shoot me?

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Nushif

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Been reading a different thread and a lot of talk is going on about how any kind of stranger is to be instantly classed as potentially hostile. Talk about "circle around him, so that his friend can't get you from behind" and "only thing you should say is "I don't know" or "Not interested" and keep walking."

Now, this is an issue for me.

Why, you may ask ... well ... I'm a talker. I'm from the PNW, don't believe in "Sir or "Ma'am" outside of military tradition (Pacific Northwest) and I have a beard.

Now an honest question here, since these things have happened. First lemme give a description of myself not in uniform and between drills.

I weigh in at 200 pounds about, am 5'10" and mildly athletic. Usually I wear cargo shorts, hiking boots and a metal band shirt. If weather requires it this gets augmented with an overshirt (which conceals my gun real well) a zipper hoodie or a normal hoodie. All in black or dark colors. My hair is shaved, but I do have a beard. I have a mild accent that really only people who spent a lot of time in Germany can place as very near the french border. I am tattoed on both shoulders, the back and one arm. If you're lucky and a sudden gust of wind blows my shirt up, you may spot a black 1911 in a holster on my strong side hip, if you're really looking. No watches or jewelry.


Situation 1:

Now, I have pulled over when people were on the side of the road, usually with a flashlight in hand and I walk towards the car asking something along the lines of "Hey, what's the problem?" in a friendly tone. Yes, at night.

Am I as good as dead?

Situation 2:

I am in a city, meandering along, my tattooed wife on my arm and stop you in a large-ish city saying "Hey, we're looking for a nice restaurant around here in walking distance, can ya recommend something?" (This was on our anniversary, by the by)

Same question, am I tasered or shot yet?

My question here being how much of this "Stranger Danger" do you guys really apply in everyday life? Have you found your interactions with people suffering for this? How does it make *you* feel to treat strangers with hostility in mind, essentially?

What's your take on this? Do I need to be scared for my well being at this point?
 
I think you're taking some of the things people say as way out of context. Being approached by someone on the side of the road could mean they have an innocent request or offer; or that they are trying to scam/intimidate you. It is unwise to trust completely every stranger you meet. With that said, I don't think anyone in this forum is advocating shooting you just for walking up to them, but rather to be on the alert for a potential attack or scam.

Personally, your description isn't what scares me. A beautiful girl my age that I do not know is the person I would trust the least.
 
Serious actually.

Remember, any stranger who approaches you on the street wants something and it is never to your benefit. Don't talk to strangers.
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Stranger danger! This definitely applies to anyone approaching me for any reason. I rarely respond to anyone with more than "no" or "I don't know", or brief eye contact to acknowledge their presence.
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Also, if ANYONE you don't know approaches you on the street to ask directions or whatever, immediately circle to his outside as you engage him.
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And these are some of the mild ones that I've read on this board.
 
Sure. But this is about likelihoods, however low. Do I literally expect people to shoot me? Hopefully not, but you will allow me a small bit of humor here?

Opening a thread "How hostile will you be to me?" is a lot more leading, because people will say "I'm not hostile to strangers, so obviously I would be perfectly nice and polite." while still posting how to best potentially shoot me. Whereas a thread titles "How likely are you to shoot me?" is a lot less leading because shooting random strangers is clearly not socially acceptable. Hostility though is.
 
When I am approached by a stranger in a potentially hostile environment I circle to maintain my distance and give a quick glance to make sure no one has slipping up behind me. As long as the stranger does not continue to try to get within hands reach (very obvious to a trained fighter) nothing happens. I am a talker myself and have no problem with friendly strangers. After 25 years of training I am subtle enough that you would never notice that I am sizing you up and keeping you at a safe distance unless you really force the issue. If you continue to encroach on my personal space even though I keep moving away the next step would be a verbal warning such as:
“ Hey, I don’t know you stay back.”
If you still kept moving towards me I would probably throw a medium power sucker punch to the solar plexus and then back away. This does no perminate damage, leaves no evidence and you will get over it in a minute or two and by then I will be gone.
 
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Sorry,I dont get the question I guess

UNLESS you step into 'that zone' where your in MY space,I dont care how you dress or look.

If I see a gun I might be a "bit" cautious and yes I might blade you as a target.

But if you are not giving me the 'target' stare and stepping into MY space,then why would I Tazer/shoot you ?.
 
I don't know what it is about me, but people ALWAYS ask me directions. At least twice a week I get asked, and the type of person ranges the full spectrum of characters. I will admit to profiling, but not based on what they are wearing or look like.

Usually it is pretty clear if it is someone from out of town who is lost. I still don't get in too close. But there have been 2 occasions where they kept asking to clarify, if I could show them, if I could show them on a map....it just seemed sketchy. I tried to keep my general movement in the same direction, never really stopped moving, pointed them the right way, politely said I was in a rush and was on my way.

UNLESS you step into 'that zone' where your in MY space,I dont care how you dress or look.
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You must live in a rural area. In the city, your zone can be reduced to zero pretty quick.

Nushif I get what you are saying, that we shouldn't be prejudiced by how people look. I think you may have taken some situational awareness strategies (which I admit seemed a bit extreme) and extrapolated some ideas that people are profiling, and based on the way you present yourself it seems you may have been the victim of negative profiling which is unfortunate, I have as well. It stinks but I'd hope that even if people are a bit more skittish based on how you look, that your friendly demeanor immediately sets them at ease.
 
Hey, there's a whole science of how to be polite to people without letting them get inside your guard and/or misdirect your attention from some ill purpose. If you don't know what this person's intents are, you should not be letting them get very close to you, or taking your eyes off of their hands.

However, that's a far, FAR cry from shooting anyone, and I'd think that is very well understood by now.

"Stranger Danger" as you call it is a primary part of human interaction. And it has nothing to do with threatening someone else, or even considering threatening them, and certainly not causing them any physical harm. ... Unless you MUST to stop an attack.

In the end, no one really cares how you choose to look or dress. It's what you DO that matters. If you're seeking to be accepted as a friendly entity, you have to go out of your way to prove your good intents -- no matter what you look like. If you're ok with being kept at arm's length and treated politely but firmly and perhaps a bit distantly -- dress and act however you want. You'll be treated like any other stranger.

But no one's going to SHOOT you. That's silly.
 
I'm pretty heavily tattooed, wear hardcore band shirts, have giant holes in my ears, and generally do not look like your "average law abiding gentleman".

I've yet to be shot or tased.
 
Body language, rapidity of approach, and further interaction has a lot more to do with how you get responded to.

You sound like you wouldn't really set off most people's "spidey sense," although I think you should be careful approaching females who are alone because that is a much more sensitive situation than chatting with someone on a busy street with your wife around.

But seriously this thread is kind of silly. You are basically trolling members here, or the other possibility would be that you take everything written way too literally without reading between the lines or looking for nuance (I will admit some people get a bit out of hand with their online chest beating too, though).
 
You're sure not going to get shot by me.

I spent waaaay too much money on LFI-1 to deviate from the "immediate, otherwise unavoidable danger of death or grave bodily harm" standard.

Asking for suggestions for a place to eat doesn't meet the standard. :rolleyes:

I'll probably move slightly to one side to regain comfort, and then give you a bunch of great restaurant suggestions; many of which you'll love, if you're in my city.

The car thing would probably be a shorter conversation through a cracked window; no harm, no foul.

So long as you don't start hammering on the car with your flashlight, pull your 1911, or otherwise go off the rails, it's a non-issue!


As well, I'm a whole lot more interested in grooming motions, signs of adrenaline dump, target/escape glancing, circling, or felix the cat eyes than I am tats or a metal t-shirt (make it an old-school 70's-80's-era priest shirt, and it might be me talking to you). ;)

I profile *hard* (at least, I'd like to think so) but it has little to do with dress, and more to do with behavior and body movements.

FWIW.
 
And I agree! there *is* a whole science to this, I'm just wondering how the average populace walking away from these training events is translating this into real world interactions.

Because I do tend to be both (dare I say) disarmingly friendly and pretty harmless I haven't personally had issues, but when it comes to some of the opinions people portray here I am wondering how that does colour their interactions with the outside world.

And thus far with some noise in the signal I am getting answers. (Excluding some literality(tm) again) Hoping for more!
 
Nushif, shooting and moving from someone are two different things. I am not going to shoot someone cause they look funny.

As far as asking directions and such, do it like you would like someone to approach you on the street.
 
One of my best buds was a co-worker named Tom Muraski. He was HUGE, probably 6'5", with tattoos and a beard. Looked like a biker. Looked kinda scary.
He was also one of the nicest AND smartest guys you could ever know.

I interact with people of all types, every day, at work. I can get along with just about anyone.

I wouldn't shoot or taser you.

I'm somewhat confused by this thread.
 
Shoot? No. But my hand would be on my carry weapon. Had a moment of "stranger danger" in a Walmart parking lot about a month ago. High crime area neighborhood, mid 20s black male from a minivan ran up to my car asking "Can I have a dollar for gas?" He didn't get the business end of a handgun in his face but the safety was off. I told him I don't carry cash and drove away.
 
None of those scenarios present a shoot scenario.

I think it's questionable to walk around looking like a representative from the Aryan Brotherhood, latently exposing your 1911 during wind gusts.

I don't need to look for problems.
 
When I was a long haired hippie freak I got treated differently than when I was a suit wearing sales rep. You choose how you look voluntarily, don't expect other's perception to match your intent. Though a big sincere smile does help people relax.
 
I have interacted with people ranging from "long haired hippie freaks" to tattooed and pierced yoots. And a lot of people wearing suits and ties. What determines my reaction to them (and you) is how you approach me. Come up asking for directions, don't crowd me, speak clearly, don't get jittery, don't keep moving your hands toward your pockets, we'll get along just fine. Violate one or more of those and we may have words about you backing off. Where it goes from there depends entirely upon you.
 
Nushif said:
...What's your take on this? Do I need to be scared for my well being at this point?
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Perhaps not, but you can probably expect a reasonably guarded, cautious response. It would probably be best also for you to avoid intruding on others personal space. Allow any interaction to unfold slow and calmly. And even if you don't believe in it, a few "sirs" or "mams" won't hurt.

We all do well to remember that being free to communicate how and what you wish, including by your speech, by your actions, or by your dress, does not mean that doing so is without social consequences. You may be free to "communicate", but others are free to either pay attention or not. And others are also free to form opinions about you, your intentions, character, values, or beliefs based on how and what you "communicate."

How you present yourself to the world is up to you. But you can't complain when people form impressions of you or make judgments about you based on the way you do present yourself to the world. It's just how people are.
 
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