How to talk to politicians.

[Oleg Volk]

A few bits of advice on talking to people trying to get your vote:

>>Ask them several questions, with RKBA being only one of them. Use neutral terms instead of pro-gun terms to get a more accuate response

>>Ask open-ended specific questions like "Which of the current gun laws would you change and how?"

>>Require that they go on record, in writing or on video, with thatever statements they make about RKBA. They should not be bashful about their positions.

 

[HankB]

Sage advice, Oleg.

But where do I inject tar and feathers into the conversation?

 

[Jac]

That's how you start a conversation with a politician.

"Now that I have your attention, Congressman... tell me why I should reelect you."

 

[Monkeyleg]

Oleg, I've been doing what you describe with candidates for several years.

It's very important to not let on to your political philosphy. Ask about generic issues, such as school funding, property taxes, etc.

Then gently segue into the question of what to do about high crime rates.

I had one candidate for a state appellate court position tell me that she thought that only active or former military or law enforcement personnel should be allowed to own guns.

"So," I said. "Your position is that Timothy McVeigh and Mark Furhman owning guns is acceptable, but I cannot?"

For an educated woman, she was awfully dumb to fall into that trap.

 

[Telperion]

Another useful tip is to familiarize yourself with your representative's pet project. Every legislator has one; for example, my Congressman is very interested in international human rights. Everyone likes to have their work recognized, so discussing it with them helps build some rapport and credibility.

 

[Barbara]

When talking to politicians, especially in a social setting, under no circumstances should you tell them you are a Muslim lesbian if you are, in fact, neither of those things.

I've been warned about this. Just last week, actually.

 

[Waitone]

Respect the office regardless of your personal opinion of its occupant.

 

[taliv]

this thread was kind of a let-down. i was expecting an oleg poster of a large-caliber machine gun "talking" to politicians.


edit: yeah, don't give away your position BEFORE you hear theirs, but obviously, after you do, make sure they know how you feel.

 

[Hoppy590]

logic, a cool head, and emotional seperation will always win an arguement. wether the other person knows you won or not is a whol nother deal

 

[RealGun]

It will need to seem likely that you will vote for them or are not antagonistic from the outset. Could be a short conversation.

 

[Werewolf]

When speaking to any politician if one expects to have any chance of positively influencing said politician one must:

1. Pucker Lips.
2. Attach said lips to the bare posterior of the politician to be influenced.
3. Apply negative pressure thru the lips to said politician's bare posterior while slipping paper money (preferably large denominations) into said politician's back pocket.
4. Remove lips from the posterior of said politician maintaining negative pressure while removing said lips (they like that loud smacking sound for some reason).
5. Speak to politician in a calm mild tone being careful never to raise your voice. The occasional baaahhh-bahhhh or sheeplike bleat has been shown to positively effect the mood of a majority of politicians.
6. If results of step 5 are unfavorable repeat steps one thru five until desired result is achieved.

NOTE: Re: Above Procedure: It has been regularly documented that anytime a politician's lips are moving that there is a high statistical probability that said politician is taking liberties with the truth (they're lying dummy). One must take this into account and evaluate carefully the results of the application of steps one thru 6 above before concluding success. In the event that success is concluded it may still require that steps one thru 5 above be repeated at regular intervals in order to assure continued and necessary action on the part of said politician.

In the event that repeated application of steps 1 thru 6 above fail to achieve the desired result then:

7. Offer said politician booze, and/or your wife and daughter's naked bodies (substitute son and/or drugs as situation requires). If the politician happens to be female adjust as necessary to achieve desired results.

In the event all of the above fail don shackles, bend over and present bare bottom to said politician because brother you're - well - use your imagination - you'll figure it out.

NOTE to Readers: Statistical evidence reveals that in recent years the application of the above procedure is becoming less and less successful (some researchers have theorized that politicians are for some unknown reason becoming hard of hearing). In addition it should be noted that threatening to vote for or support the politician's political opponents will result in little more than laughter from said politician which will take what little mind they have off the subject at hand and make your task of influencing said politician much more difficult. It is recommended that in order to save time and embarassment one skip the above procedure and just don shackles and bend over.

 

[AZRickD]

We've had the requirement that candidates must pose for photographs with an ugly black rifle before addressing our membership.

Some do, some don't.

Rick

 

[Art Eatman]

But remember to keep the thought simple. Complexity creates confusion. Don't use too many polysyllabic words, and keep the sentences short. Overall, it's helpful if you're an elementary school teacher...

Art

 

[GrammatonCleric]

How to talk to a politician

I talk to them very slowly as if I am talking to either a very small child, or someone who is mentally impaired. Politicians are not worthy of being treated like adults anyway. Besides, talking slowly is the only way to let your idea soak through their thick skulls and rattle their pea brains anyhow.

 

[LAR-15]

Offer them a bribe first.

 

[GeorgiaGlocker]

From what I understand you have to use $20 bills.

 

[Deanimator]

Prior to the AWB sunset and the 2004 elections, I just asked Senators DeWine and Voinovich in emails whether they were looking forward to a John Kerry Presidency. I told them if they WERE, they just needed to reauthorize the ban, and I'd do my part at election time by staying home... along with millions of other gunowners. I sent a similar email to the White House.

They seem to have taken the hint...

 

[Johnny_Yuma]

Dang, Oleg

I was really hoping "How To Talk To Politicians" was going to be the title of one of your posters!

 

[No_Brakes23]

We've had the requirement that candidates must pose for photographs with an ugly black rifle before addressing our membership.

Some do, some don't.

I wonder if any of them check the breech after receiving the weapon. That'd be big fat clue about their hoplophobia/hoplophilia, eh?

 

[FreedomKommando]

Last time that I had a chance to submit a question to some candidates, it was "How many guns do you own?"

 

[bouis]

Indeed. You really do need to keep it simple.

I once had a chance to ask my congressman why he backed Wesley Clark over George Bush for president. The gist of the question was, do you think Clark's promise of fiscal responsibility is more important than values. Unfortunately I opened the question by listing the General's various left-wing stances on issues, and my congress critter responded by explaining to the mostly-black audience why he thought affirmative action wasn't always bad.

Suffice to say I didn't get a chance to clarify the question -- in fact, I got cut off by the moderator, who wanted to make sure that at least TWO other people would get to ask "So, who do you support for President?"