I agree that a CCW weapon is GOING to require compromise. I prefer a full size gun, currently the CZ75B Police is top of my list, but I can't comfortably conceal that weapon. I have been down the same road you are on and, believe me, it is a looooong road. I probably own 30 pistols that I planned to CCW and now most of them hang out in a safe.
I prefer pocket carry so I don't want a hammer. I prefer no external safety so I accept the long trigger pulls on the "pocket rockets". I like the shield and the XDS, especially for IWB carry. I am not a Glock fan. I really like the Colt Commander but the hammer rules it out for me. Wheel guns are too "fat". Seems you and I are on the same road.