You might try .38 Spec. loaded with wad cutters in a light weight S&W 5 shot revolver or the Ruger LCR in .38. Wad cutters are for target shooting and have low recoil but should be on equal par with a .380 or a little more. I would try to try out the combination prior to buying, maybe rental or a friend. The lightweight 5 shot revolvers do not weight your pants down during pocket carry and with a good pocket holster can be carried without much printing.