Oxymoron

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Ain't the 'Net great!!

Here we are gathered on THR , a group of responsible firearm owners, with all sorts of interests, and experiences.
We are a varied group of ladies and gents, from kids to older.

We share experiences strengths and hopes, we laugh, we congratulate, we hug and we cry.
We have guns, ammo, knives, gear...

Then again, in speaking with a member of Staff today, we got off on a tangent, and it was funny.

~~

-One has a Surefire in the vehicle, and uses the wife's pig key chain light bought at the checkout at the Book Store to find something in the car.

-New tactical knife is in a blister pack, and the person has to borrow a knife to get the blister pack open.

-None of the screwdrivers in a gun screwdriver set , will fit a firearm, the screw driver for grandma's sewing machine fits that screw perfect.

-The dad is caught using the kids Snoopy Flashlight to find his Surefire the family dawg put under the sofa.

-The Space Pen will not write, so Mom has to use her son's Big Fat Pencil to jot down a phone number.

-The cute young lady is keeping all her shot in a playing card with a Pink Cricket, and the fella two slot over, cannot get his gun to run he built, and when it does go bang he misses the whole target.

-The older gentleman with a old Colt Detective Special is keeping all ihs shots in a playing card. The fella next to him cannot get his custom gun to run and , when it does go bang, he misses the whole target.

-The kid pulls a little red wagon with all the stuff they are going to shoot, and includes the old timey water jug grandpa has.
The cart the fella has, has a wheel come off, and his camelback is leaking.

-The son goes to visit his mom, and his new tactical knife will not cut the rope in the back yard.
Mom comes out with a Old Hickory kitchen knife and cuts this rope.

-Said son shares about the new expensive sharpener he has at home.
While mom touches up the blade on the bottom of a ceramic cereal bowl.

-Boyfriend cannot believe how sharp his girlfriend's SAK Tinker is.
He sees the stone and starts reeling off words in Japanese.
"No, I use a part of a Terra Cotta flower pot I broke" she replies.

-New 4 wd camo truck has to be pulled out by a 75 Chevy 2 wd truck with recapped mud tires on the back.

-Leatherman won't work, wifes dull butter knife does.

-The Japanese Water Stones come by UPS and the knife won't cut well to open, but the wife's disposable ink pen opens the box.

-Grandpa has gotten a deer ever year with a Model 94 he bought before grandson was born.
Grandson has a neat gun, just it never hits deer, maybe that tube thingy atop the barrel is messing the boy up.

Oxymorons...
 
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

Why do they call them apartments when they are together?

Why do people park in a driveway but drive on a parkway?
 
In answer to the first post. Some folks just know what works and don't care about "cool factor" etc, especially the older folks, and double especially if they were raised in the country. :)

I can't think of an oxymoron other than a quote from the movie "Oscar". "He's right, your an Ox and a Moron", in response to Dr Poole, the Linguist, telling him, "be carefull, that was an "oxymoron". :uhoh:
 
Please don't cringe.

I once dropped my Argentinian Mauser while taking it out of the truck on opening morning of deer season. It landed upside down and broke the rear open sights completely off.

All my friends who had brand spanking new rifles laughed and ribbed me with lines like "I guess you'll just have to point shoot!" HA! "That probably won't matter, you couldn't hit anything with that piece of crap anyway!"

They really yukked it up after I drove back to my house and came back about a half hour later WITH THE SAME GUN. I had taken a hot glue gun and GLUED THE BROKEN SIGHTS BACK ON. My friends and their huge scoped expensive rifles LAUGHED HYSTERICALLY!

Until the end of the day when I was the only one who got a deer. One of my friends had actually taken a shot as well...........but missed.
 
semi truck driver midget who drives truck or driver who completed half the driving course.
Semi boneless ham
Honest politician
John McCain Straight Talk Express
 
If the prefix "re" signifies repeating an action, does that mean that the first time you write in a book or save something on tape or disc, you "corded" it, or the first time you put something in the ice box you "frigerated" it? :eek:
 
:D

From "Land of the Dead": "Nice shooting."

(I'm sorry, I can't resist--it hasn't been said yet---forgive me for what follows---)

"Good lookin' Glock" :neener:
(Actually, I kind of like how Glocks look... is that even worse?)
 
If "pro" and "con" are opposites, than what's the opposite of "progress"?
 
......re---gress :)

civil servant, neither civil nor do they serve:uhoh:
i stand, well sit corrected. my wife points out to me that here in Corrupticut they do serve. recently we have had about 10 doing time in prison on multiple charges. our (ex)Governor, 3 major city mayors on down to a dog pound employee. methinks you all can guess the charges
 
Near-miss

Freezer burn

Jumbo shrimp

Great depression

old news

Microsoft works

government worker

good grief

pretty ugly
 
When I hear "Oxymoron", I sometimes think.."Wow, even the Oxen are convinced that guy is a moron.."
 
-The son goes to visit his mom, and his new tactical knife will not cut the rope in the back yard.
Mom comes out with a Old Hickory kitchen knife and cuts this rope.

If I took one of my mom's kitchen knives out to the yard to cut a rope she would ask for it back and proceed to chase me around the house with it.
 
Why do they put Braille on drive up ATMs?

If 7-11s are open 24/7/365, why do they have locks on the doors?

If the little black box on an airplane is indestructable, why don't they make the entire plane out of that?
 
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