Is it rude to ask someone if they are carrying?

I think I can understand the question in that context but I do think it is rude to ask someone in passing unless you are well acquainted. He was just trying to make a sale and was giving you an excuse to not remove your coat.

It's not a question I would ask.

I think it was fine in that place and context. At a gun show and he's trying to sell you a holster. If carrying was the reason, he would have probably told you why that was OK etc.

No, it's not rude. Bit tacky maybe. But I'd just smile and say you have to have a 'need to know', and you don't need to know.

Deaf

A question like that wouldn't seem out of line to me at a place like a gun shop, or range, or any place where I would assume nearly everyone to be a firearms enthusiast. I sometimes find myself wondering if, or what, a guy might be carrying, but my curiosity is not overwhelming enough to go bothering people about it.

Now if a stranger inquired about such things while strolling through the grociery store I would be a little concerned about their motives and probably try to answer as vaguely as possible.

I wouldn't feel comfortable asking someone personally, but on the other hand I'm not very social to put it mildly (some where my mother just scoffed); but if someone asked me I wouldn't think there was anything wrong with it unless they were some anti-gun nut who wanted to chew me out or something.

The guy is at a gun show trying to sell holsters (for a gun you might be carrying); what else would he ask?

I don't like being asked. My GF introduced me to her aunt & uncle a couple weeks ago, at Disneyland of all places. She told them I was a cop. Guess what their first question was...

I gave the vague answer that "I generally carry all the time".

Absolutely. Extremely rude.

Jeff Cooper said, many years back, that it was rude to ask to handle another man's gun, as it put him in the uncomfortable position of having to say NO. He said that IF the other man wanted you to handle his gun, he would volunteer to let you do so.

This is the same thing. If I want you to know whether or not I'm carrying a gun - I'll volunteer that information. Asking if I'm carrying is right up there with asking if I'm wearing underwear. It ain't none of your business.

It's not rude because the other person doesn't have to answer.

TruthTellers said:

It's not rude because the other person doesn't have to answer.

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The other person doesn't have to answer anything. But, just because you don't to answer doesn't mean it's not rude.

12131 said:

The other person doesn't have to answer anything. But, just because you don't to answer doesn't mean it's not rude.

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Well, I don't think it's rude. Is it rude to ask someone if they have AIDS? Again, I don't think so.

I really don't think it's rude to ask anything.

If the first word out of a person's mouth in response to something I've said is, "Why?",
especially if said with an attitude indicating that they think my response was wrong,
then I think it's rude, and ramp up my response to help them understand why.

Condition orange.

In that context and setting(crowded place with many an ear,) I'd say rude.

Hey TruthTellers, What's up with that huge wart on your nose?

Sounded rude to me.

Having got that off my chest, I'm sorry for being rude. Largely I think you are correct.
If you are asking a question that is not demeaning, it's not rude. Are you carrying a gun?
Doesn't sound demeaning to me.

It's a "that falls under the heading of my business" question making it rude by definition.

Depends on the circumstances. In that context, a sales venue involving firearms and possible sale of a holster, not in my opinion.

At a social gathering, where you might prefer to keep that info to yourself, I think it would be.

I would not face the Opening Post situation at the local gun show. There is a rule: no loaded guns at the gun show, and I do not concealed carry at the gun show. (Local gun shows are where people who have inherited guns they don't want go to sell them to licensed dealers or collectors. I watched the cop safety checking and cable tying guns at the door clear an inherited gun carried in fully loaded by an heir with no experience with guns. I've heard it happens often.)

Theoretically speaking, though:

If someone asked, "Are you carrying a gun?" so they could call 911 and report "I feel threatened by a man with a gun" and get me SWATted, would that be rude of them to ask?

If I answered "Why do you ask? Are you looking for an unarmed victim?" would that be rude of me to answer?

To me, to answer "Why do you want to know?" is certainly no more rude than to ask "Are you carrying a gun?"

In that setting no,he was just being a pushy salesmman.
I was at a friends house one day for a party and during a conversation my frienld brought my pistol permit up,his wife(who' about as liberal a person as I care to know),blurtts out "do you have a gun with you right now",that was rude and out of place.

Normally my answer is N.O.Y.B. (none of your business), but at a gun show with a guy selling holsters it is a valid question.

IMHO some of you guys need to take a deep breath and relax.

You choose to go to a event whose purpose is to buy, sale and trade guns and firearm accessories. There are rows and rows of tables with guns displayed, patrons walking through the isles packing guns and folks carrying guns lined up outside the doors waiting to get in.

Then you stop at table, look over the holsters and the vender suggests you try one on. Sounds like a good suggestion to me. When I have a gun I am looking for a holster for I bring the gun with me so I can check how well it fits the holsholster and me.

If other folks in a gun show knowing you are carrying a gun why are you running the risk of being seen in the parking lot where the assumption by others is you must be a gun owner since you are attending a gun event?

I rarely buy firearms at gun shows. I am after accessories such as magazines, grips and, yep, holsters so I carrying a backpack. I can't begin to estimate the hundreds of times a vender has asked me what kind of gun do I have in my bag.

Yeah, take a deep breath -

It's poor sales technique. Nice conversation, things going along, the vendor offers you a holster to try on.

1) you don't micromanage the customer on what article of clothing he needs to take off.

2) if he declines you don't escalate the situation by making an assertion - one that should be freaking obvious inside a building filled with people handling, holding, carrying, and wearing guns.

The guy was at least being obtuse, not smooth. It WAS rude because it's calculated to get the customer to either be offended and move on, or try on the holster to prove his manhood. It was probably the rudest attempt at qualifying a buyer at a show I've heard of recently.

First Rule of gun shows - don't touch anything, just look. Second rule, don't talk to the vendor unless you are trying to buy it. There is no casual conversation at a gun show - they are trying to watch 50 people all of who are handling their merchandise (Rule 1) and they know by being at a show for months on their weekends that people steal stuff - buy distracting them with conversation while a confederate pockets an item off the table.

That's why all the glass cases.

He was rude. Not the best way to handle it. Which brings up the usual questions about why, because we only have this one-sided story about what was going on. I'm thinking what was "casual conversation" wasn't, from his perspective.

But, we'll never know, will we?

So i was at a gun show today, and i got to chatting with a fellow selling holsters, after a few minutes he hands me a holster and told me to take off my coat and try it on.....well i wasnt terribly interested so i declined, and he says to me "why? are you carrying?"......

and that just struck me as kind of odd......i wasnt what youd call offended....but it just seemed like kind of a rude question to ask someone you dont know...

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In that context no, I don't think it's a rude question.

In almost any other context it's a rude question and one I would answer with a flat "No" regardless of who (Apart from law enforcement) asked

. No, it's not rude. Bit tacky maybe. But I'd just smile and say you have to have a 'need to know', and you don't need to know

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This is one of those questions where (IMO) any avoidance of the question will be taken as a yes. So, my default answer is no regardless. It’s a lie but it’s one I’m willing to tell in the interest of Opsec.

I view it as generally no one's business, and thus a little rude.

It's like asking someone how much they weigh, or how much money they make. He was trying to make a sale, but sounds pushy, which might have added to your irritation from the question.