I used to be recoil shy. My first handgun was a 9mm, because I heard the .40 and the .45 both had a lot bigger kick. Once I shot a .45, I said, What's the big deal? Moved up to .357. Did NOT like the recoil in a snubby, but enjoy it in my 4" GP100. Got the .357 because I heard the .44 mag was a recoil beast. Eventually got a .44 mag (S&W 629, 4" bbl). Once I shot it, I said, What's the big deal? Shooting the .44 mag puts a big grin on my face, but if I had to shoot constantly, I would pick the .45. But only because my 1911 is the most accurate gun I own. I suppose it helps that don't even notice the recoil on it.